A Bad Year
by katieyellow
Summary: Haley returns from tour the summer before senior year because of her parent’s deaths. Haley wants to win back Nathan but Haley’s years going to get a lot worse before it gets better.
1. Karma Police

This is my first fanfic and although I'm not very good at writing I do carefully edit my chapters so hopefully the stories an okish standard. This story is set after series 2 but doesn't stick to series 3 or 4 but does have a few bits of story line from them. Couples will be Naley and very minor Brucas and even less Jeyton I'm afraid.

**Summary**: Haley returns from tour because of her parent's deaths. It's the middle of the summer before senior year and everyone's away on holiday. Haley wants to win back Nathan but Haley's years going to get a lot worse before it gets better.

**Karma Police - Radiohead**

**H**aley sat staring across her almost bare apartment, she had been back almost a month but she didn't have much stuff or the money to fill it properly.

It was a lot emptier in many ways then when she had left it to go on tour.

She had a squishy red sofa that she was sitting on and a smallish coffee table that was currently covered in school books that she'd been trying to catch up with, on the work she'd missed from last year.

Although she had been ahead in her previous years after going on tour she was now quite behind. School started again tomorrow and she was going be in her final year.

Too be honest she was dreading it, only Lucas' visit a few hours earlier had made her worry less.

He had been away all summer with his girlfriend Brooke. He had finally admitted to her at the beginning of the summer that he loved her and so she'd asked him to spend the summer with her in California.

Peyton had also been away that summer with her dad. She hadn't spoken to Peyton while she'd been away so she doubted she'd have been asking to hang out with her any way, she knew Peyton had abandonment issues.

Before she had left for tour she'd only really started being friends with Brooke and Peyton and it was more their connection with Lucas that had made them friends in the first place, so she was doubting they were still going to be the best of friends.

It had been great seeing Lucas earlier but painful as it brought up stuff she'd be trying to forget for the last month.

She had not planned on returning from tour after Nathan told her he didn't want her back but one phone call had changed that.

She had just come off stage after finishing her 30 minute set when her tour manager had pulled her over to a corner. He had explained that while she was on stage her sister Vivian had called to say that her parents had been in a road accident and she needed to ring her straight away.

Haley's stomach had dropped; she couldn't believe that they hadn't told her right away that was one of the things she hated about the industry some of the people were only interested in how much money they could make and not real people's feelings.

When she had called her sister and heard her crying down the phone she knew without words they were dead. She had grabbed her small bag and left the tour for good, she left her guitar behind knowing she would never play it or sing again as she now associated her music with losing people she loved.

She had returned to Tree Hill the day before the funeral and had gone to Lucas' to find comfort but Lucas had left with Brooke so she had broken down in Karen's arms instead.

Haley had known if she had called Lucas he would have come back but she wanted him to be happy and she knew Brooke made him happy. Karen and Keith had supported her and gone with her to the funeral which had all passed in a blur to her as her parents deaths hadn't really sunk in.

All the financial assets had been divided between the siblings and Haley had got a size-able amount but couldn't touch it until she went to college. Karen had offered Haley Lucas' room for the summer but Haley knowing she would need somewhere permanent for the next year had re-rented the apartment she had lived in with Nathan before she left for tour.

Haley had got her job back at Karen's café and been working there for the last month, but she made Karen and Keith swear not to tell Deb about her parents as she didn't want Nathan to know.

Deb had not been working since Haley had been back as she was in rehab trying to break her prescription drug addiction.

Karen had kept her word and not told Deb or anyone about Haley's parents until Lucas had returned and that had been why he had rushed straight over to see her the evening before school started. She had been so happy to see him but he had been surprised as she had not cried once even when she had said all about her parents.

The truth was Haley liked to pretend it wasn't true so when she retold Lucas the story it all seemed detached and like she was talking about someone else. She didn't tell anyone but she liked to imagine that they were still alive and out there in their RV and they just couldn't get to a phone to speak to her.

Lucas had then told her about his summer and how great it had been. Haley had been happy for him but couldn't help but feel jealous and wish she had spent her summer with Nathan.

Before Lucas left she had made him promise not to tell Nathan or anyone about her parents dying. She didn't want people to pity her and to pretend to be nice because they felt bad for her.

Lucas had pointed out that he would have to find out at some point and she didn't want to lie to him but Haley was positive it would be better in the long run. Lucas had tried to convince her that people would support her cause they cared for her but Haley had been stubborn and Lucas had given in, hoping that sooner or later she would let some more people in.

* * *

At 11pm she had decided it was time for bed and walked into her also sparsely decorated bedroom which only contained a double bed, a wardrobe, a desk and a chair.

As Haley lay in bed she couldn't help but think how big it felt without Nathan next to her, there wasn't a night on tour when she hadn't missed sleeping next to Nathan. She hadn't seen him since she had got back as he had been at high fliers all summer.

She had sent him a letter a while after she had got back just to tell him she had returned and that she was back for good. She had hoped he might have come to see her when he had got back but Lucas had been her only visitor.

She eventually drifted off to sleep still anxious about school the next day and wondering what lay in store for her in the next year.


	2. The End of an Anchor

**The End of an Anchor – Dashboard Confessional**

**T**he whispering started as soon as Haley had entered the school. She had been used to a few stares and looks since she had married Nathan last year but this was in a completely new league.

What's more no one was even attempting to keep their voices down. She heard mutterings of "she thinks she's so great because she went off on a music tour" and "you would have thought she would have got some dress sense while she was on tour."

She would have burst into tears by the time she got to her locker if she hadn't been greeted by the friendly face of Lucas who gave her a big hug.

She had missed Lucas so much over the summer and it was such a comfort to her having him there. She tried to remind herself that before Nathan she had just had Lucas and she had done fine, she ignored the small voice at the back of her head telling her that then she'd also had her parents.

Lucas had not stopped worrying about her since his mum had told him about her parents. She seemed to be doing ok but Lucas knew that knowing Haley this meant she was trying to ignore the problem.

"So how's your timetable looking?" Lukas asked in a forced cheery voice as they compared their schedules.

Nathan walked down the corridors of Tree Hill High towards his lockers. He had been back from High Fliers for a few days but had mostly been playing basketball at home or seeing Peyton.

He hadn't wanted to come back to school today he knew he was going to see her and he didn't know what he wanted to say.

As he turned the corner he saw them at the lockers next to his. He silently cursed that the lockers were put alphabetically.

He hated Lucas for seeing Haley without telling him last year and for not leaving Dan alone when he had told him to. He almost turned around but there were too many people around and he didn't want to look weak so he went straight over and started putting stuff in his locker.

Haley only noticed Nathan when he reached his locker right next to hers as she was too engrossed comparing timetables with Lucas. All she could do was stare at him.

He looked great she thought, his summer at high fliers had left him more toned if that was possible and he had recently cut his hair so it was short just the way she liked it.

She watched him rooting through his locker and knew if she didn't say anything he wouldn't either.

"Hi Nathan."

"Hey" he said back softly still looking in his locker. There was a pause.

"How you doing?" she asked nervously biting her lip.

"Fine" he said slightly shrugging, still avoiding look at her.

"How was High Fliers?" Haley asked hoping for more then a one word answer.

He finally turned towards her but didn't look at her directly; he couldn't believe that she was stood there making small talk like nothing had happened.

"What are you doing?" he asked rhetorically running uneasy fingers through his hair "We need to talk" he said as he looked quickly around the corridor "but not here. I'll find you at lunch" he said and with that he grabbed his stuff and walked off down the corridor without looking back.

Haley sighed and turned to Lucas.

"That could have gone worse right?" she asked him.

"Yeah, you'll talk at lunch and you'll sort some stuff out" Lucas replied wrapping his arm round her shoulder although secretly feeling doubtful that any good would come of them meeting at lunch. With that they both set off to their first classes.

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Nathan had spent his classes before lunch planning what he was going to say to Haley but he was torn, he couldn't just pretend everything was the same but he wanted so much to kiss her and hold her in his arms.

As he had gone from classes he had heard the whispering about Haley and people gossiping about why she had left the tour.

The favourite rumour seemed to be that she had had an affair with Chris and once he had got bored of her he had got her kicked off the tour.

He didn't believe any of the stuff that was said but still he was curious why she had come back. He didn't believe it was him as the last words he had spoken to her had been to say he didn't want her back, obviously they had been a lie but he didn't want her back just because she felt sorry because of his accident.

He saw her sitting on a picnic bench alone with a text book open and a sandwich at her side, he laughed to himself trust Haley to be doing work on her first day back, he realised that was probably why she had returned, to finish her final year, school had always been important to her.

He went and sat down across from her and it took her a second to realise he had sat down as she seemed off in a world of her own.

He looked at her for the first time since she had left and felt his heart beating faster. She looked as beautiful as ever but there was a sadness in her beautiful brown eyes that hadn't been there before, he briefly wondered if it was due to him.

"Doing work already?" he asked looking down at the book.

"Yeah" she said closing the book and looking up at him "I've got so much to catch up on and then there are all the advanced classes …." she trailed off knowing he didn't really want to talk to her about her work.

"The joy of being seniors huh" he replied. There was silence for a while as neither person knew what to say.

"I still love you, you know" she said looking into his eyes. Nathan just stared at her; he hadn't expected her to say that, he almost wanted to laugh.

Of course he knew she loved him and he loved her but his pride wouldn't let him tell her that.

"Didn't seem like it when you left me for Chris" he said his voice cold. Haley felt herself get cross she couldn't believe he really thought she would leave him for another man.

"It was the music I left for not Chris. I can keep telling you that but I don't know how to make you believe it" He looked away not knowing what to say, he was still hurt she would choose music over him.

"So why are you back, everyone seems to have a different theory." He said as she looked down and laughed bitterly.

"Yeah I seem to be the talk of the school" She paused not knowing how to answer his question of why she came back. She didn't want to lie to him but she couldn't tell him about her parents, him pitying her would be worse then him ignoring and hating her.

"I guess I just discovered what was important and that's family. You're my family Nathan and I can't lose you" as well she thought silently in her head.

She looked over at him, she wanted a hug from him so bad, she needed her husband, she needed him to help her with her grief and she unconsciously leaned towards him slightly.

He looked at her sadly he had been hoping that maybe if they talked he would be able to just forgive her but he realised he still couldn't.

"I'm still hurting Haley and I can't forgive you just like that, my life since you left has been shit. I just need more time" he stood up "and I need space away from you. I'm sorry. I think its best if I concentrate on Basketball and you concentrate on something you love whether that's school work or music or what ever" Haley watched him walk away and felt like she'd been punched in the stomach.

Hadn't her giving him space been what had lead to how they were now.

"You're the only thing left I still love" she shouted after him but he was too far away to hear. It was only when he was finally out of sight that she let herself cry.


	3. When the Leaves Have Fallen

**When the Leaves Have Fallen? – Willy Mason**

**I**t was the second Thursday evening since she'd started school and she was busy working at Karen's café.

She worked a shift everyday after school Monday to Thursday 4 to 9 and Sundays 10 until 6. She had gotten into a routine since she had started back at school.

Wake up at 6 and go to school. Finnish school and go work at Karen's. Finish at 9 and do homework until about 1 then bed.

She was exhausted but she had no choice she needed to work so she could pay her rent and buy food and she needed to do so much homework so she could keep her head above water in all her advanced classes, she was really enjoying them but there was just so much work.

It didn't help that she only got 5 hours of sleep a night and it made the homework take twice as long to do. After school on Friday she had gone home and fallen asleep on her sofa.

Lucas had woken her when he rang at 8 to ask her if she wanted to go to a party but she had declined feeling too tired to leave the flat. She had made herself some simple dinner and then slept.

Her Saturday had been spent doing homework and trying to clean up the flat. Sunday had been back at work. Karen had questioned her about the hours she had chosen but even with all she was doing at the moment she couldn't afford her rent along with the bills she had to pay and was dipping into the money she had saved from tour and the summer.

She knew it was only a couple of weeks before her savings ran out but she was just trying to ignore it like a lot of the problems in her life.

Brooke and Lucas entered Karen's Café and smiled up at Haley as they took a seat near the window.

"Wow Luke what a romantic place to take me where you can get all the free food you like" Brooke said sarcastically.

"Well" Lucas said "I was thinking the more money I save on eating with you here the more money I have for presents for you" he said and Brooke squealed

"I do love presents" she replied smiling at him. They both looked deep into each others eyes completely forgetting where they were and that there were other people around.

Haley walked over and coughed loudly.

"Sorry guys just wanted to take your order" She laughed as Lucas blushed slightly.

"We will just have a strawberry milkshake and two straws please" Lucas said. Haley rolled her eyes but Brooke smiled happily over at him.

"I love you so much" She said contently. He smiled back equally as happily.

"I know I love you too" He looked over at Haley who was at the counter staring sadly into space, it seemed to be her favourite pass time at the moment.

"You don't mind if I just go talk to Haley a second do you" Lucas asked. Brooke pouted at him.

"But we're meant to be on a date, Haley's busy working she doesn't need you distracting her like I do". Haley walked back over with their milkshake.

"Enjoy "Haley said setting the milkshake down and walking off again.

"I'll just be 5 minutes; you can time it if you like" Lucas replied to Brooke and took off after Haley before she could reply.

"Hey Buddy" Lucas said as he leaned on the counter next to her. "How's it going?"

"Great, I got an A on my English assignment" She replied only slightly enthusiastically, she remembered a time when her school work had meant a lot to her but recently she was too tired to get excited about anything.

"That's great" Lucas replied he looked around awkwardly, he wanted to ask about Nathan but he didn't want to upset her.

"What ever it is you can ask me Lucas" Haley said slightly smiling at him, she knew him too well for him to keep much from her.

"I'm sorry Hales I was just wondering how you and Nathan were doing" Lucas asked, it was hard for him to know at the moment how much of Haley's sadness was caused by her parents death and how much was caused by Nathan.

He was still waiting for the time she would break down and talk to him about her parents' death but he knew he couldn't push her.

"Just super" She said sarcastically "He wants space and says he's going to concentrate on Basketball this year. How about you two, is he talking to you again" Haley asked hoping to deflect his attention.

People always said it helped to talk about your problems but every time she talked about Nathan it just hurt.

"Yeah we're also super. He's still not talking to me" She smiled at him sadly feeling to blame for the brother's broken relationship.

She looked over to where Brooke was and saw a guy attempting to chat her up. Brooke was trying hard to ignore him.

"I think you need to rescue your girlfriend Luke" Lucas looked over for the first time and felt angry that someone would be hitting on his girl.

He stormed over and as Brooke put her arms around him the guy backed off.

"Lets go back to mine Luke" Brooke said with a sexy smile. She knew if they stayed there much longer with that other guy Lucas would kick off.

She also wanted to get away from Haley; she was slightly annoyed that Lucas had left her on their date to go talk to her. They both got up and waved goodbye to Haley as they left the café.

Haley only had 20 minutes left until she could go and she couldn't wait to leave, even if she did have a mini mountain of work to do when she got home. She was wiping down the counter when the door jingled as it opened and two of the last people Haley expected to see walked in.

Nathan had not known Haley was working in Karen's again but he should have expected it as she had rent to pay he rationalised. He and Peyton approached the counter hesitantly, when Peyton had suggested they get some coffee she hadn't know Haley would be here.

"Two take away coffees" Peyton said coldly to Haley. Peyton wasn't happy with Haley and she felt no need to hide it.

Haley was just part of the list of people who had left her and she had also hurt Nathan. Haley went out back to get the coffee.

"You could have warned me she was going to be here" Nathan whispered to Peyton.

"You think I would have brought you if I had known, I don't want to see her either." Peyton replied.

Haley, although out the back heard them. She could see why Peyton was upset with her but she never thought she would hold such a grudge.

At least Peyton was being clear how she felt; all the second guessing around Nathan was killing her. She walked back with the coffees and handed them over.

As she gave Nathan his, their hands brushed and Haley felt a spark jolt down her arm and it froze her for a second.

Nathan seemed to feel the same as he was rooted to the spot as Peyton dug around in her purse for the money. Haley felt light headed and it was just one small touch, this was the closest she had been to him since they had talked.

It was intoxicating being this close and knowing she couldn't touch him. Peyton startled her by dropping the money on the counter and half dragging Nathan out the cafe.

Haley couldn't help but be hopeful, Nathan had seemed as affected by their hands touching as she had. She just had to get him to kiss her then he would never want to let her go she thought.

She rolled her eyes annoyed at herself, he wasn't going anywhere near her so she doubted she would get to kiss him any time soon. She knew she would have to start off small and 'accidentally' bump into him.

She didn't know how he could take it she craved his hard body and his soft lips; it had been months since they had kissed.

She needed to change her attitude she decided, she had been so down since she'd been back, she knew with good reason but no one wants a misery guts.

She made a promise to herself she was going to be more positive and she hoped maybe if she was more positive on the outside she would feel better on the inside too.


	4. Don’t be Shy

Hey, want to say thank you to mistydm and aqualeo2425 for giving reviews and to answer your question nothing romantic is going on between Nathan and Peyton they are just friends. Also Rachel is going to come in in the next chapter or so and in my story Rachel joined the school just after Haley left for tour and is friends with Peyton Brooke, Nathan and others on the cheer leader squad. Anyway hope your enjoying the story.

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Don't be Shy – The Libertines

**I**t was Friday lunch time and Lucas went down to sit with his girlfriend Brooke who was sat on her own.

"Finally I have missed you so much" Brooke said to Lucas and kissed him passionately.

"Well I've missed you too, but I did only see you this morning and I'm seeing you after school too." Lucas pointed out, although secretly he loved that she had missed him.

He was so happy at the moment and it was all down to Brooke. The only thing worrying him at the moment was Haley but he had seen her earlier and she had looked happy.

He had asked her if she had talked to Nathan but she just said she was being positive. He wasn't 100% sure she was really feeling ok but if it was real he was hoping it would last.

"So oh wonderful boyfriend of mine you are going to join me at Nathan's beach party tonight aren't you?" Brooke asked, she knew Nathan and Lucas were still having problems so she needed to check he would still want to come.

"Of course, I need to protect you from all those drunken idiots who think they are good enough for you." Brooke blushed slightly; Lucas wasn't over the top with compliments so when he said one she knew he really meant it. "I was hoping you could do me a big favour though and convince Haley to go." Lucas continued. Brooke looked at him sceptically.

"I don't know, Nathan doesn't want to see her at the moment and she hasn't exactly been cheery lately she probably doesn't want to party" She said.

"Ahh yes but have you seen Haley today, she's looking positively chipper. Plus you can convince anyone to do anything. It will be good for both Nathan and Haley I promise" He asked in his best begging voice. "It would mean a lot to me"

"Ok, just for you. We can even escort her to the party." Brooke gave in, she didn't really know Haley but she would do most things to make Lucas happy, plus she always loved being the centre of attention and she knew arriving later with Haley would make her just that.

Nathan was eating lunch on his own today. Tim was off chasing some girl who had let him borrow a pen in class, Peyton was still in the art room finishing off some work and Rachel, well he had no clue and didn't really care to be honest.

Those were the three people he seemed to be spending all his time with lately when he wasn't training for basketball. That's what he was going to be concentrating on this year, it was his final year and he wanted to win the state championship this year, for himself and Whitey.

It was good he had basketball to think about because it distracted him from Haley. It was so strange seeing her around school but not with him.

She had seemed really down which hadn't really surprised him but today for reasons unknown to him she had suddenly seemed happy.

He had seen her talking with one of her tutees and she had been smiling. It had made him pause for a second and smile; it was nice to see her looking happy.

He had not forgiven her but he didn't want her to be unhappy. He had wanted to go over and talk to her and have a happy normal conversation but he knew that wouldn't happen that it would be awkward and strained. Last night at the café he hadn't been expecting to see her but when they had briefly touched it had felt so amazing for the millisecond it lasted.

It was a better feeling, that small touch, then most of the kisses from random girls he'd had. It was his annual party at the beach house tonight and his secret wish was that she would come, in class when he wasn't paying attention that day he would imagine half way through the party her arriving and him taking her upstairs and forgiving her and making love to her.

He was broken out of his fantasy again by Tim joining him. He sighed, he doubted Haley was even going to go tonight so he knew there was no point thinking about it and so instead listened to Tim talk about getting turned down, again.

Haley was at her locker at the end of the day trying to fit all her books in her bag, she turned round to see Brooke approaching her.

She put on her best smile and reminded herself to be positive. It surprised her a bit though Brooke normally only talked to her when Lucas was around although to be fair she did normally only see Brooke when she was with Lucas.

"Hey tutor girl I have got an offer you can not resist" Brooke said flashing her her million dollar smile. "There is a party tonight and Lucas and I really want you to come." Haley hesitated slightly; she knew it was Nathan's party and was about to reject the offer but then she remembered she was being a positive normal teenager.

"That sounds great Brooke; I could do with a good night out." Haley said.

"That's great" Brooke replied hiding her surprise. Lucas had been right Haley did seem much happier today maybe she would be some fun tonight. "We'll come get you at 9, see you later"

With that Brooke was off down the corridor. Haley felt slightly nervous; people at school were still talking nastily about her so she didn't think they were suddenly going to be nice to her just because she turned up at a party.

But she convinced herself that she would see Nathan and that would make it all worth it.

Haley's clothes were in heaps all over her floor. As soon as she had finished talking to Brooke she had rushed home and it was and hour later and she had no clue what she was going to wear.

Since she had been back from tour she had not really cared what she was wearing as long as it was clean and as she looked at all her clothes her positive attitude was going. She had not been shopping for months and the nice clothes she had worn on tour she had left behind.

She finally found a light denim skirt that stopped just above her knee and wedged sandals but she had no tops she could wear.

She sighed and knew what she had to do. She picked up her phone and dialled a number.

"Hey Brooke, hope I'm not interrupting something." Haley said politely.

"Nah its fine me and Lucas were just having a make out session" Brooke responded, Haley cringed at the thought Lucas was like a brother to her and she didn't want to hear about him kissing people.

"I wanted to ask you a huge a favour but you can say no, I mean I'm sure I could find something or ask someone else, I mean maybe…."

"Haley you're rambling. What is it?"

"Oh yeah sorry, I was just wondering if I could borrow a top for tonight as I seem to have nothing to wear."

"Yeah that's fine, you know I have the perfect top for you, Nathan will love it. Me and Luke will be over in an hour and I'll even do you make up" Brooke squealed down the phone, she loved dressing people up.

"Sounds great" Haley replied slightly regretting calling Brooke she knew she could go a bit over the top when it came to make up and clothes "I'll see you soon then bye"

Haley put down the phone and started packing her clothes away. She wanted to look really good for Nathan but she didn't want to draw too much attention to herself, she got enough of that as it was.

It took her 20 minutes to fold all her clothes up and put them away. She walked into the kitchen and briefly looked in the fridge.

She hadn't eaten anything since breakfast but she was too nervous to eat now so she just started on some homework and waited for Brooke and Lucas to come.

Brooke had picked a black top with a clingy waste and a low neck line. Haley had reluctantly gone and tried it on and came back looking nervous.

"I don't think it's me Brooke" Haley said showing off the top to Brooke and Lucas.

"I agree I don't think its something she should be wearing to this party she'll get groped all night." Lucas added, he wasn't used to see Haley wear stuff like this and it kicked his brotherly instincts into over drive.

"Come on Haley I know it's something you wouldn't usually wear but just for one night you can wear it and be someone else and be brave and talk to Nathan." Brooke said she knew the top looked great on Haley and thought Lucas was overreacting, she wore stuff like that all the time, after all it was her top.

Haley went and looked at herself in the mirror; it would be nice to be someone else for a night that didn't have to worry about bills or lost family. She didn't know if she would be comfortable wearing it all night though.

"Look Nathan will not be able to keep his hands off you I promise, he just needs a little reminder of how sexy you look and he won't be able to resist you." Brooke continued, she did really want to see them back together.

"Ok I will" Haley gave in, it was true Nathan would not be able to resist her in this top and that's what she needed.

"Yay" Brooke squealed again "Time for make up. Lucas go watch TV." She ordered. Lucas took off with a sigh. "Ok but we are leaving in 30 minutes." He reminded them. Brooke finished off Haley's look by lightly curling her hair and giving her smoky eyes.

"Thanks Brooke it's really nice of you to do all this" Haley said when she was done, she had to admit she did look great.

"It's what I do best and I know I'm amazing. You can thank me later when you get back with Nathan. Come on lets go before Broody gets cross" Brooke said heading out to find Lucas.

Brooke also looked amazing she was wearing a red silk corset top and a short flowy black skirt. They all piled out of the apartment and Haley locked up, she couldn't help but feel so nervous.

Deep breathes she told her self and big smiles, you're someone else she told herself who doesn't have any worries. You're just a normal teenage girl.


	5. Just a Girl

**Hey just a quick note, pulling is kissing, I don't know if you really use that term in America, we do in the UK even though it does sound pretty gross. Also thank you again for everyone giving reviews I appreciate it lots. I also would like to apologise now as this One Tree Hill party will not involve a game of I have never :P**

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Just a Girl – No Doubt

**B**y the time Haley, Brooke and Lucas arrived at the party it was packed and people were everywhere.

The living room was full of drunken people either dancing or pulling in corners. They walked into the kitchen after not seeing anyone they really knew in the living room. All the kitchen counters was filled with kegs of beer and bottles of spirits.

"Drink Haley?" Brooke asked making herself a vodka and coke.

"Ok just a little one" Haley said, she didn't normally drink much, in fact she didn't drink at all but she needed some courage. Brooke handed her the drink and she pulled a face as she drank.

"Brooke I said not much alcohol" Haley said. Lucas gave Brooke a look.

"What it's the same amount I've got" Brooke said defending herself "Live a little Haley it won't kill you" Brooke said smiling and finishing off her drink.

Brooke poured herself another one while Lucas got himself some beer. They chatted a while in the kitchen and Bevin joined them, Haley only half listening as she sipping her drink.

Lucas had wondered over to where Skills and Junk were and they were having an animated conversation about basketball. Haley felt awkward there with Bevin and Brooke but she knew she would have nothing to add to the guy's conversation.

As she was watching the boys she noticed that Skills kept looking over and checking out Bevin. This made her smile, Skills had always been a great guy and she also liked Bevin, although it made a strange match she thought it would be good.

She didn't really know Bevin but she had always been nice to her and hadn't treated her any differently since she had returned from tour. Bevin and Brooke excused them selves while they went to the bathroom so Haley spent a long time make her next drink, putting little bits of what ever she could find in her glass, she knew girls took ages in the bathroom and she didn't have anything else to do until they returned.

She was wishing she hadn't come, she hadn't seen Nathan yet and she was just having awkward conversations.

Nathan walked into the kitchen to get another beer when he saw Haley in the kitchen absorbed in making herself a drink. She looked amazing, but completely unlike her.

She had a low cut top on and smoky eye make up, it made her look great in a completely obvious way, as he looked around the kitchen he could see two freshmen checking her out.

This seriously pissed him off. It also pissed him off to see two girls behind Haley obviously bitching about her.

He could tell Haley had noticed as there was a definite pink tinge to her cheeks and it explained her absorbed attention to making a drink. He saw her finish making the drink and down it in one, this worried him Haley didn't usually let people she didn't know get to her.

It was funny really as the Haley he knew didn't drink and she didn't wear clothes like that, although he guessed maybe he didn't really know her any more, as he would never have guessed in a million years she would show up tonight.

But he had wanted her to he told him self. As he stood there in the door frame he knew he could made his classroom fantasy come true he just had to walk up to her.

As he was thinking this Haley suddenly looked up at him and seemed surprised to see him staring back at her, she took a step towards him but it was too much for him.

He backed quickly out of the room and headed up stairs to find his secret stash of expensive booze, this was all too much for him he needed another drink.

Haley had been making her drink when she had heard the girls behind her, it was really stupid because she didn't even know them, she guessed they were juniors.

They were calling her a whore which she found amusing as they were dressed pretty much the same as her only their skirts were a lot shorter. She finished making her drink and downed it in one; she was defiantly going to need a lot of courage if she was going to survive this party.

She started to feel light headed as she turned around and saw Nathan standing there staring at her, he had an unreadable expression on his face.

She used her new found courage from the alcohol and stepped towards him but no sooner had she done that that he ran out of the room.

She heard the girls laugh nastily behind her and she headed out the room to look for someone to talk to. She walked into the living room and saw Lucas so she headed over to him.

After 40 minutes of talking to Lucas Haley looked over to the dance floor and saw where Brooke, Peyton, Bevin and Rachel had been dancing Skills and Bevin were now kissing.

She had never properly talked to Rachel but from what Lucas had told her she seemed really fake, Haley also didn't like the way she was always hanging around with her husband.

Nathan had also come back down stairs and was on the other side of the room talking to Tim and some other members of the basketball team.

Haley wasn't really enjoying herself but she still felt a bit tipsy from the alcohol which was giving her a bit of a buzz. She didn't really want to stay but kept thinking that maybe later she would have a chance to talk to Nathan.

Brooke finally dragged her onto the dance floor and she began to enjoy herself a bit more as she ignored Peyton and especially Rachel giving her death stares.

Guys she didn't know kept coming up to her and trying to dance with her but she kept pushing them off, it was really frustrating her though so when Brooke offered her another strong drink she took it.

After another 20 minutes of dancing Haley reluctantly followed Brooke, Peyton and Rachel over to the sofas to rest.

She really wasn't having a good time now, every time she tried to join in with the conversation Rachel would glare at her. She found this especially annoying as Rachel seemed to dislike her even though she had never done anything to her.

Lucas who had been over talking to the river court guys, minus Skills who had gone for a walk down the beach with Bevin, walked over to them and tickled Brooke, She smiled widely at him when she saw who it was.

"Hey you I have some think to show you, upstairs" Brooke said to Lucas seductively. Lucas smiled and followed Brooke as she guided him out the room.

The second they left Peyton and Rachel left her to go talk to Nathan and his friends. Haley sat there for a minute on her own, sipping her drink. She looked over at Nathan and saw Rachel with her hands on his arm laughing at something supposedly hilarious thing he'd said even though everyone else was just smiling wryly.

Haley had had enough, she was fed up of all the stares and the whispering, she had enough of that at school she didn't need to put herself through it here as well. She stood up and swayed slightly, she made her way for the door but as she passed the girls from earlier she felt a foot suddenly stick out under her and because of the alcohol she'd had she went flying forwards her head crashing into the door frame.

She lay on the floor for a second feeling stunned. Then suddenly she felt herself being scooped up and carried upstairs, her head was throbbing and she kept her eyes closed.

She assumed Lucas had seen the whole thing and was taking her to safety but when she looked up when she had been placed on a bed up stairs she found her self looking into deep blue eyes and a mop of Black hair.

Nathan was not enjoying the party; he kept wishing the whole time that he could talk to Haley but although his heart wanted to his head said no. He kept looking over at her dancing and balling his hands into fists every time he saw a guy approaching her.

Luckily though she would push them off straight away, he was tempted to go dance near her and maybe accidentally bump into her but he hated dancing. Peyton and Rachel came over and joined him and his friends and he saw Haley left all on her own; he tried to distract himself by telling an awful joke. He felt slightly taken back when Rachel starting laughing hysterically and touching his arm, it hadn't been that funny. That's when he noticed Haley get up and start to walk towards the door wobbling slightly, he also noticed the girls from the kitchen earlier whispering and smiling and just as Haley passed one of them stuck their foot out.

With out hesitation Nathan ran forwards but he was too late he saw Haley tumble forwards and her head hit the door frame.

He closed the distance between them and scooped Haley up. She was holding her head and had her eyes closed. He took her upstairs and put her gently on his onto his bed.

He saw her open her eyes and the look of shock when she realised who had rescued her.


	6. This Scene is Dead

**Once again thank you for all the reviews and I hope you enjoy this chapter.**

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Chapter 6-This Scene is Dead – We Are Scientists

**H**aley just stared up at Nathan, her head was throbbing and she felt tired, she didn't know if it was because of the alcohol or the knock to the head. She still had her hands covering her forehead where she had hit the door frame. Nathan looked down at her lovingly, for the first time in a long while not thinking about their past but just worried about Haley's safety.

"Hales" Nathan said softly to Haley kneeling next to her on the bed "Take your hands away and let me look at your head." It made her feel weak him using his old nickname for her, she slowly lowered her arms and leaned back on the bed.

His voice was too soothing, it made her feel safe and she just wanted to sleep with him there protecting her. He looked at her head, a big red bump had appeared on her forehead but it wasn't cut or bleeding.

He gently stroked his thumb over the bump but Haley flinched in pain.

"I'm sorry" he said moving his hand lower so it was cupping her cheek. Haley felt like she was in heaven, she didn't care that her head hurt she would go through this everyday just to have Nathan touch her like this.

He tenderly stroked her cheek and her eyelids began to flutter shut and her breathing started to become more even.

"No Hales" Nathan said a bit louder "You can't go to sleep now you might have concussion" Haley just continued lying there so he gently pulled her forwards towards him.

Her head came to rest on his shoulder and her breath tickled his neck. It was driving him crazy having her this close to him he just wanted to kiss and touch her.

He decided to go get some water to sober her up a bit, he lay her delicately back on the bed and she moaned softly at the lose of contact with Nathan. He went down stairs and got some water when he bumped into Lucas

"Is Haley ok? Where is she?" Peyton had filled Lucas and Brooke in about what had happened in the living room.

"Yeah I'm just looking after her upstairs, she's going to be fine" Nathan replied gruffly, he knew how to look after his own wife.

Lucas just nodded still looking worried but Brooke pulled his away to the corner saying on the way that Haley would be fine. He went back upstairs and found Haley sleeping on the bed she looked so peaceful so unlike she had been looking when she was awake recently.

He sat next to her on the bed and gently shook her shoulder to wake her up; she stirred slightly but didn't wake up.

"Haley come on it's wake up time" Nathan said but she still stayed asleep so he did the thing that used to wake her straight up, he tickled her sides.

She sat bolt up and put her hand to her head she looked around the room slightly confused.

"I thought it was just a dream" Haley said softly, she was loving the way Nathan was looking at her, like she meant everything to him. It was too much for her though the past few weeks had been so hard and she was so tired she just wanted to tell him everything and have him look after her.

"Nathan I" She started as tears began to fill her eyes.

Nathan didn't want her to continue though it was fine being here with her as long as he didn't have to think about the past, he did the only thing he could think of to stop her talking.

He closed the small gap between them and pressed his lips against hers. Haley was shocked for a second but soon joined in the gentle kiss. The kiss started to get harder and more passionate as both of them wanted more from the other, Nathan was leaning over Haley kissing her like there was no tomorrow.

One of her hands was in his hair the other rubbing his muscled torso. The touches of her small hands were driving him crazy. He had one hand on her cheek and the other stroking her thigh. She moved up and started unbuttoning his shirt but paused when she noticed his wedding ring on a chain round his neck, she had thought that he had got rid of it, it made her feel happy and confident that things were going to work out.

Nathan was in heaven, the feeling of Haley all over him was amazing, he had missed this so much. She had just started unbuttoning his shirt when she had paused and he saw her looking at his ring and smiling.

It hit him like a punch to the stomach, he shouldn't have done this, Haley thought this meant something more then it did. He pulled back from her and sat on the edge of the bed looking down at his hands.

Nathan hadn't meant to but he knew this would really hurt Haley and he wanted to be the one to make stuff better for her but he didn't trust her, trust that she wouldn't leave him again.

Haley was just staring at the space on top of her where Nathan had been a second ago. It had only been a few seconds but she missed him madly already, her body felt cold and her head was still throbbing.

"I thought" Haley started but she was interrupted by Nathan.

"It was just the moment Haley, it doesn't mean we're getting back together, it was just..." Nathan stopped he didn't know what it was that they had just done, his heart was aching and he felt guilty but he just sat there staring down.

Haley's heart was breaking into a million pieces, she had been sure that if she had kissed and touched him that he wouldn't be able to let her go but he had. She felt so ugly and disgusting, Nathan had rejected her and suddenly being this close to him was making her head spin.

She jumped up off the bed and shakily ran out the room, Nathan felt her leave but he couldn't bring himself to stop her, he knew she'd probably go find Lucas and he would look after her.

Nathan took his shoes off downed some more alcohol and got into bed and tried to sleep.

Haley ran down stairs in search of Lucas but when she found him he was in a corner with Brooke, they looked so happy just absorbed in each other.

She also found she was cross at him for not coming to find her when she was hurt she hadn't known that he had.

She felt so awful and she didn't think she could take it, she went into the kitchen and scanned the counter, she picked up a ¾ full bottle of whiskey and headed for the back door, she wasn't watching where she was going and bumped square into Rachel who spilt her drink down herself.

"You bitch; you did that on purpose and no Nathan here to protect you this time." Rachel said.

"Just leave me the fuck alone Rachel" Haley shouted and ran out the back door onto the beach.

Rachel smirked as Haley left, things had obviously not gone well with Nathan, ever since she had moved to the school she had wanted to get with Nathan and what Rachel wanted she got.

She didn't think Nathan would have chosen Haley if Rachel had been there last year. Lucas and Brooke entered the kitchen with Lucas looking slightly worried.

"Have you seen Haley anywhere, she not with Nathan." Brooke asked her.

"Um yeah, I think she left she was looking pretty happy too." Rachel lied.

"Oh ok" Lucas said looking surprised, maybe things with her and Nathan had gone well he thought.

"Come on then pretty girl I will escort you home" Lucas said kissing his girlfriend and leaving the party.

Haley ran down the beach until she ran out of breath then she collapsed on the sand and took a big gulf of whiskey, it made her throat and stomach burn but she took another gulp.

She just wanted the pain to go away. Now she was away from everyone she couldn't help but cry.

She gulped more whiskey in between her sobs. It was on her sixth gulp that she started to feel better, it wasn't because she felt happy it was because she was beginning to feel nothing.

It was after her eighth gulp that she started to feel sick; with her last bit of energy she stumbled down to the sea and was sick over and over again. If she had been thinking straight she would have been glad no one was there as she was a complete mess.

She staggered back up the beach next to the whiskey bottle and drank some more. She felt so lonely, Nathan had rejected her, he didn't even want to sleep with her.

Wishing she hadn't come to this stupid party was her last thought before she passed out.


	7. Sleep Don’t Weep

**Chapter 7-Sleep Don't Weep – Damien Rice**

**T**he first thing Haley noticed as she regained consciousness was her pounding head. Then that she was soaked through and freezing, it had rained during the night but she had been so out of it she hadn't woken up.

It took her a few seconds to remember how she had ended up there and when it hit her she wanted to cry all over again.

She felt like crap and every part of her ached, she slowly sat up but was hit with a wave of nausea and she threw up again. She slowly reached into her pockets to find her phone or wallet but then remembered that Nathan had taken them from her after she hit her head.

She was torn, the last thing she wanted was to see Nathan again after last night but if she didn't go back she would have a 20 minute walk home.

She got up to her feet gradually and swayed gently as she waited for her eye sight to stop blurring.

She looked at her watch; it was 6.30 am if she walked back now she probably wouldn't bump into anyone so no one would ask any questions.

By the time she had taken 30 steps she was seriously considering going and getting her phone and purse, but the memory of Nathan rejecting her, hurt too much.

She didn't need him she told herself she just needed to get home to bed and some dry clothes and those were the words that kept her going on her walk home.

It took Haley 40 minutes to walk home and when she finally got into her apartment (using the spare key as hers was in her purse) she was shivering. Autumn had come early this year and brought with it a bitter wind which had been blowing into her the whole walk home.

She had been grateful that she hadn't bumped into anyone as she looked at herself in the mirror in the living room; she was very pale with bright red rings around her eyes which were puffy and the bump on her head was bruised. She managed to pull her clothes off and collapse onto the sofa pulling the throw over her before she fell into a deep sleep.

When Haley woke 5 hours later she didn't know how it was possible but she felt 50 times worse then earlier.

Her headache was worse, she still ached all over, her throat felt raw, she felt sick and she felt suffocating hot.

She needed some water but she couldn't move, she started to cry again.

It was one of those times she wanted her parents so much, she was only 17 not even an adult yet and she didn't have them to look after her any more. She continued to sob but her head and throat were in so much pain she forced herself to stop but still the tears rolled down her cheeks.

She tried to think logically, the living room was too hot, so she needed to be in the coolest place in the flat which was the bathroom.

She got up and grabbed the throw from the sofa; she grabbed some aspirin from the kitchen and a glass.

When she got into the bathroom she filled up the glass and lay down in the bath on top of the throw, it was so cold and for a second she felt good again. She took some aspirin and drank some water before putting the glass by her side and tried to fall back to sleep.

Although the bath wasn't that comfortable, nothing felt comfortable to her and it wasn't long before exhaustion clamed her again.

Nathan had woken up the day after the party feeling like shit and it wasn't just the hang over, he was used to those.

It was because he knew he had hurt Haley. He continued to lie in bed, he didn't want to have to get up and start the clean up down stairs he looked over to his night stand and saw Haley's phone and purse.

He sighed knowing he would have to return them to her which would mean going over to her apartment, their apartment well at least it had been. Suddenly the cleaning seemed a lot more appealing. He walked down stairs and was surprised to find a group of 20 male freshmen from school tidying up his house.

It was then he noticed Rachel in the kitchen giving orders.

"Rachel what's going on?" Nathan asked running his hand through his hair.

"There you are lazy bone, well I thought that you could use a hand cleaning up and these guys jumped at the chance to help me when I asked them" Rachel replied smiling sexily at him. "Plus you deserve a break after last night it must have been really tough for you having Haley here and you were so great looking after her like you did" She said sucking up to him and appealing to his male ego.

Nathan smiled slightly, Rachel was right no one seemed to be appreciating how hard this was for him and it had been really good of him to look after her.

"You deserve a day off, why don't we go for a spin in my dad's boat for the last time before winter" Rachel suggested to him, hoping a day alone with her would take his mind off a certain petite tutor.

"I don't know" Nathan said, it did sound appealing to get away from stuff for a day and he hadn't been out on a boat for ages.

"Come on I'll let you drive" Rachel wheeled.

"Ok then" He said smiling "I'll just go grab my stuff" He knew that he should go return Haley's stuff but it seemed at that moment Rachel was the only one who understood how hard this all was on him, little did he know Rachel didn't really care and just wanted to get closer to him.

It was 10.30 pm when Nathan returned home, he had had a good day but at the back of his mind he kept thinking about Haley.

He had deliberately stayed out late with Rachel so he could put off seeing Haley until tomorrow.

He had had fun with Rachel but she was a bit too touchy feely with him. Rachel was always nice to him but he didn't like her in that way, he didn't think he would like anyone again in that way.

He woke up at 9 on Sunday and decided to get it over and done with. He went for his morning jog came back and got showered.

He picked up Haley's phone and saw that she had three missed calls from Lucas he grabbed the wallet and drove over to the apartment.

Although he had a key he decided he should probably knock. He knocked then waited but no one came, he decided to open the door to check she was ok after all he rationalised to himself she had a bang to the head on Friday. That made him feel guilty again, he hadn't looked after her like he told Lucas he would.

He walked into the flat and saw the living room and kitchen were empty although the clothes Haley had been wearing at the party were wet and on the floor, he hesitated before heading towards the bedroom; he glanced into the bathroom as he went and did a double take.

The door was open and he saw Haley lying in the bath, her face was completely pale apart from her red eyes and the bruised bump on her head. She was asleep and her breath was slightly strained, she looked so fragile she had beads of sweat on her forehead. He went over to the sink and wet a flannel before gently pressing it onto her forehead.

She moaned slightly and he carefully stroked her cheek, her eyes suddenly shot open and she looked confused.

When Haley woke up to feel a cold wet towel on her forehead and Nathan there she was sure she was hallucinating. Her head was still pounding and she was so hot, her throat was also dry as hell.

She reached over to grab her water but her hand was shaking so Nathan helped her guild the water to her mouth.

"Hales what's wrong?" Nathan asked returning the glass to her side and crouching down beside the bath.

"Ill" was all she replied, she didn't like him being this close at the moment. When he had helped her with her glass of water it had brought back Friday night with force and she didn't want to see him.

She also felt self conscious, she knew she looked like crap and she also felt exposed, she was just wearing her underwear and although they were married he hadn't seen her like this for a while. She just wanted to get him out of there and let her deal with being ill; she didn't want him to feel obligated to look after her.

There was an awkward silence.

"I came over to return your wallet and phone, you left them at mine" Nathan said suddenly feeling like he had to justify himself for turning up. "I can stay you know, you need someone to look after you, you don't look good."

"Thanks" Haley said weakly and sarcastically. She didn't want him here just because no one else was so she did the first thing she could think of and lied. "There's no need though, my parents are here looking after me." Nathan looked around as if suddenly expecting them to be stood in the corner.

"Haley there's no one here" Nathan was worried she was hallucinating.

"No they've gone to the shops to get some food they'll probably be back soon so you can stay and see them if you like" Haley said, she knew there was no way Nathan would want to stick around to see her parents considering how things were at the moment.

"Actually I should probably go let you have some rest, do you want some help getting to your bed" He asked.

"No it's nice and cold here." She said closing her eyes hoping Nathan would get the hint and leave.

When she hadn't heard him leave she opened her eyes again, she saw him looking down hesitantly at her.

"I was thinking maybe we could try being friends, you know until.." Nathan said.

She knew what he meant; he wanted to be on speaking terms with her with out having to deal with their feelings.

She always thought when they started to make progress she would feel happy but she just felt like crap and at that moment she just wanted him to leave.

"That sounds great" she said and with that he finally left.


	8. Like Eating Glass

**Chapter 8 - Like Eating Glass – Bloc Party**

**I**t wasn't until Monday lunch time that Lucas came and visited Haley. She had phoned Karen to say she couldn't work as she still felt awful, although now instead of being boiling hot she was freezing.

When Lucas had arrived he had immediately scooped her up and carried her into the bedroom. He made her drink some water, she seemed a bit out of it and was mumbling a bit but nothing he could really hear.

He was really worried about her and felt bad for seeing Brooke that weekend instead of checking his best friend was ok.

He had brought some soup with him that his mum had made but he didn't think then would be a good time to give it to her.

He decided to come visit her after school so he smoothed her hair and kissed her forehead and went back to school.

Lucas felt better when he returned after school to see that she wasn't shaking any more.

The image of her lying in the bath tub fragile and pale had been haunting him all afternoon. Haley had always been so small but when she was ill she seemed like she was about to break.

He remembered when she was younger and ill and Haley's mum would sit by her bed all day reading her stories and it made him feel really sad that Haley didn't have that any more.

Haley seemed more alert then at lunch time too, and when he entered the room she had woken up and greeted him softly.

He managed to get her to eat some of the soup too, although she only managed half.

Lucas had offered to call a doctor but she had protested and said it was just a bit of flu and it would be gone soon. So he stayed with her for a few hours and brought her fresh water bottles and read her her favourite childhood story the little prince.

Although Haley had said there was no need Lucas had got the doctor to come over on Wednesday as Haley had not improved, the doctor said he couldn't do anything and she should continue taking aspirin and she should keep her fluid levels up and keep warm.

It was not fun in the slightest staying in bed all day and being looked after because she still felt like death warmed up, although she wasn't warm at all she was still feeling freezing all the time.

Time also seemed to be going very slowly for her, she was getting less sleep and she just seemed to be half awake and just drifting through time where every minute seemed like an hour.

The only highlight for her was when Lucas came to visit her after school. When he was there he would talk to her and for a little while she would forget that her head was killing and that all her bones ached.

She was so grateful to him and he always brought her soup that his mum had made, she knew he was also working extra hours because she couldn't come into the café.

It was also nice just getting to spend time with him, it kind of felt like old times when it was just the two of them against the world. Karen had also come to visit her on Wednesday and commented on how skinny she was looking, although partly due to the fact she hadn't eaten much since she had been ill it was also dues to the fact she hadn't been eating much before she was ill too. Haley didn't want to worry Karen though so just agreed that it was due to her being sick, this made Karen fuss over her more and promise that when she got better she would have to eat her evening meals at the café so Karen could make sure she had something decent.

Haley had weakly agreed but secretly was thrilled by the prospect. Although she had felt really sick it was nice to be reminded that there were people out there who still loved and cared about her.

It was Thursday and Haley was still sick and Lucas was getting a bit tired of looking after her, he really cared about her and wanted her to get better but felt a bit put on that he was the only one expected to look after her.

Also Brooke had been moaning because she hadn't got to see him so much, he had gently suggested earlier in the week that she come help but she had said she didn't want to get sick.

On Thursday however he convinced Brooke that if she came along they could leave early and go back to his so she had given in. When they had got to Haley's Lucas went to her room and found she was asleep so went to the kitchen to warm up her soup.

"She still sleeping, she doesn't look much better though." Lucas told Brook who was sitting by the kitchen counter.

"Well if she's asleep then we can go, we don't want to disturb her" Brooke said.

"Brooke" Lucas said getting slightly annoyed as Brooke had been whining all the way to Haley's "She needs to eat or she's not going to get better." Lucas said looking through a cupboard for a bowl.

"But she needs sleep more then food right now maybe you can come back later when we've had some fun" Brooke said suggestively. Lucas slammed the cupboard shut louder then he meant to.

"Brooke I have to do this now" He replied getting cross. His anger made Brooke defensive and cross too.

"It's not like you want to be here either you don't have to be a saint all the time." Brooke said snippily.

"She's my best friend Brooke and currently she has no one else so I have to." Lucas said less angrily, he didn't want to fight with Brooke. She responded to Lucas' lighter tone and felt a bit bad.

"I know just would be nice to know you prefer spending time with me then looking after sick people" Brooke said coming close to Lucas and wrapping her arms around him.

"I know baby and I would rather be at home with you right now more then anything" he said hugging her back.

Unfortunately for them when Lucas had slammed the cupboard shut he had woken Haley and because they had left the bedroom door open, she had heard the whole conversation and was feeling hurt.

She didn't want to keep him here if he didn't want to be, she felt cross she didn't want to be seen as some burden and if Lucas didn't want to be here she didn't want him here either.

She sat up in bed and her head spun violently and for a second she felt like she was going to be sick. When the world was only spinning slightly she moved herself to the edge of the bed and put her dressing grown on.

She was so cold, even with her thick pyjamas and dressing grown she couldn't help but shiver but she knew she had to control herself or Lucas wouldn't believe she was feeling better.

She slowly walked down the short hall to the kitchen and took deep breaths trying to feel less sick.

"Hi guys" Haley said leaning against the kitchen wall for support.

"Haley you shouldn't be out of bed I thought you were asleep" Lucas said looking concerned he was stirring the soup on the stove.

"I just woke up and I'm actually feeling a lot better, I'm surprised to be feeling this good actually" she lied, hoping she didn't look as bad as she felt.

"Really you kind of look the same." Lucas said.

"Yeah you look icky" Brooke added.

"Cheers guys that makes me feel great that does. But as I'm feeling better you don't have to look after me any more I mean as much as I love you company Lucas I could probably be doing some homework or something." Haley said, Lucas had been bringing all her homework but she knew really there was no way she was up for doing homework.

Her determination to get rid of them was all that was keeping her going at the moment. Brooke's eyes had lit up at the prospect of going; it wasn't because she didn't care if Haley was sick it was just because she had missed having quality time with Lucas.

Lucas still felt unsure, he had no idea that Haley had over heard the conversation and she still looked just as bad.

"Come on Lucas you can't turn down your girl friend for me." Haley said knowing this would get rid of him.

"Yeah don't you want to spend time with me" Brooke said pouting.

"Of course I do, ok then well I guess I'll see you tomorrow then Haley" Lucas said walking toward the door with Brooke.

Haley panicked slightly then thought of another lie, she seemed to be lying to the people she loved a lot lately.

"Oh there's no need I think Nathan said he would come over, then the weekend I'll probably be pretty much better so I guess I'll see you on Monday at school." Haley said quickly inside her head just screaming for them to leave.

"Ok then, well if you need anything just call me." Lucas said and left. The second they left Haley staggered into the bathroom and threw up, she couldn't stop herself shaking, she knew it was mostly because she was ill but also because she was still upset about what Lucas had said.

She had completely lost any appetite she may have had, she turned the pan on the stove with soup in off and made her way back to bed and passed out from exhaustion.

Haley didn't wake up until Saturday morning and did feel a bit better. She ached less and she seemed to be back to a normal temperature also she felt hungry for the first time in a while.

She managed to get out of bed and didn't feel as bad as on Thursday. She went to the stove and reheated the soup from the other day.

She was slightly disappointed that Lucas hadn't come to see her because she had been hoping he hadn't meant the stuff he said the other day but she guessed that she had been leaning on him more then she should have been. You need to be stronger she told her self, you can't rely on anyone any more she thought sadly.

Although stuff was better with Nathan she mused, he wanted to be friends which was only a step below something more, kind of.

Doubt crept into her mind as she remembered Friday night and thought bitterly how he couldn't even touch her for too long. She was still sad he hadn't come back to visit her and regretted getting rid of him so hastily on Sunday.

She finished her soup and went back to bed with some homework. She sighed, now had been a bad time to get sick she had got so much homework this week which just added to the pile she already had.

She worked on the homework for the rest of the day until she fell asleep in the middle of doing a maths equation.

She woke early on Sunday morning shivering slightly and with papers all around her. Although she still felt better she knew if she had any hope of going back to school tomorrow there's no way she could work today.

She phoned up Karen who said it was fine as Deb had returned to work so there was enough staff also Keith had been helping out and was wishing Haley well; Haley thanked Karen and promised she'd be able to work tomorrow but Karen insisted that she couldn't come back until Tuesday and that she wasn't to go to school.

She put the phone down and smiled she loved having Karen around and Keith too, she was so happy they had finally got together. Although it wasn't the same as having her parents it was the next best thing, but she quickly pushed that thought away she didn't like to think about her parents.

She spent all of Sunday working in bed on her homework again and even managed to find some old leftovers in the fridge that Lucas had brought over a few days before.

By the time she went to bed on Sunday night although she still had a bit of a headache and her nose was runny she felt better and knew with a good nights sleep she'd be ready for school tomorrow.

She had promised Karen she would spend another day at home resting but she couldn't afford to miss any more school, if only Haley had known what was going to happen the next day she would have stayed in bed.

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Thank you again for all the lovely review, it's nice to see some of you are really getting into the story. Sorry that the stories pretty much all doom and gloom but it will get better for Haley, eventually.


	9. The Kids Aren't Alright

**Hey everyone thanks for the reviews. I got a few suggests of stuff for the story but I've already pretty much planned out what's going to happen in the next chapters I'm afraid. I'm away tomorrow so I'm putting up two chapters today and hopefully I should be able to update again on Sunday again. A warning that in the next two chapters violence, death and gun's are involved so if you don't want to read about that you should skip the next two chapters.**

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****Chapter**** 9 - The Kids Aren't Alright **

**W**aking up on Monday morning Haley still felt exhausted and was tempted for a minute to just stay in bed like Karen had told her too, but she was Haley James Scott, Tutor girl and she would not miss more school then she needed to. She checked her kitchen for some breakfast but found nothing, she really needed to go shopping but she also really needed to work so she could have some money to go shopping with. She had some change in her pocket so she knew she could get some lunch later which she supposed would have to do, she wasn't too worried as her full appetite hadn't returned yet. She got to school early and decided to go to the tutor centre to get some homework done, it was empty in there as most tutors choose to work with people at either lunch time or during free periods. Mouth arrived 20 minutes after she got there and came and sat with her.

"Hey I heard you've been ill, feeling much better now" He asked.

"Well yeah I'm ok, would have liked a few more days at home but got work to do" She said smiling sadly.

"Yeah you do look a bit like crap" he tried to say delicately looking at her concerned.

"Yeah well as I'm not here to win any beauty contests I should be fine" she replied half smiling, it was nice talking to someone naturally who didn't have any issues with her.

"Good point, apart from the whole being ill thing how's everything else. You and Nathan any better." Mouth asked they hadn't really had a chance to catch up in a while.

"Well you may have seen him swoop down and rescue me at that party and he says he wants to be friends, which I guess is good." Haley said not mentioning the part where he rejected her at the party.

"That does sound good, at least he wants to talk to you it wont be long now before your back to how you were." Mouth said trying to be encouraging, he thought Nathan was being an idiot if he ever found a girl he loved he would forgive her.

"Yeah that's what everyone says, although since Nathan suggested we be friends he hasn't come to see me once." Haley said sadly.

"Well if it helps he's seemed a bit happier this week and I'm sure it's down to that." Mouth added, it was true this week Nathan had not been as grumpy as the last few months.

"It might just have been because I wasn't at school." Haley said half teasing him, she guessed he hadn't visited her because he hadn't wanted to bump into her parents.

Mouth looked flustered

"I'm sure it wasn't because he wasn't see you, maybe he hasn't been happier this week or maybe it's related to something else, I'm sure he does really want to see you." Mouth rambled.

"I was joking plus if Nathan's happy that makes me happy to." Haley smiled slightly Mouth was easy to wind up. "You don't mind if I get on with this do you" Haley asked, she wanted to finish the essay before the bell and didn't really want to think about Nathan right now.

"Sure I've got some work to do some too" he replied pulling some folders out of his bag. It was 5 minutes before the bell for homeroom and she was just done with the English essay when she heard a loud bang from some where far off. It made her jump but she tried to reassure herself that it was just a car back firing in the car park when over the tannoy system she heard the principle saying it was code red, it was not a practise and people should make their way to designated areas. Haley jumped to her feet packing her stuff up.

"This is a designated area right" Mouth asked Haley, fear evident in his voice.

"Yeah" Haley said feeling flustered her headache had been gone since last night but the stress of the situation was bringing it back now. The door came flying open and Skills and some other kids came pouring in the room before Skills locked the door behind them. Everyone looked around unsure what to do now as there were no teachers to tell them. Haley decided to take charge as she had been one of the only people listening during the what to do in emergencies talk.

"We need to keep close to the floor and stay quiet" She said and everyone copied her and sat on the ground she really wished she was still in bed at home. Haley was surprised everyone had followed her with out question even Rachel who since coming in the room hadn't made a snide comment once. There were 7 of them in the tutor centre Skills Rachel and Mouth who she knew well. There was also Abby a girl she had English with but didn't really know, a freshman called Marcus who had a reputation for getting into trouble and Jimmy a guy who she used to be friends with when they were younger but over the last few years had stopped coming to the river court.

"What happened did anyone get shot" Mouth asked the group, Haley held her breath there were so many people who could have been hit that she cared so much about.

"Nah don't think so, I think we were lucky and the wall was just hit." Skills replied, Haley let out the breath she'd been holding, relieved she couldn't take any more deaths.

"What fucking idiot did this?" Marcus asked angrily balling his hand into a fist. Everyone shook their heads it seems no one had seen who the shooter/ shooters were.

"We need to get out of here." Rachel said looking round the room "Can't we go out the window"

"It's just a court yard out there it doesn't lead out of the building" Haley replied not even looking up she remembered once when Nathan had suggested they sneak out of school by leaving through the window in tutor centre but she had just laughed and told him it just lead to a court yard. .

"Plus I think breaking glass will get us noticed" Skills added.

"Skills did you see Nathan or Lucas" Haley asked him quietly.

"They're not even in school yet they had practise before school so they won't even have been in the building." Skills answered, it was a huge weight off her mind knowing her two guys were safe. She leaned against the wall and tried to concentrate on the thumping in her head instead of the fear in her stomach.

"Well the corridor sounds quiet I think we should make a run for it." Rachel said she had been listening at the door.

"We should just stay here, where it's safe." Jimmy said, he had been very quiet up until now and had just been staring down at the ground looking scared.

"Shut it fat ass." Marcus replied glaring at Jimmy before tuning back to Rachel "Yeah there hasn't been any noise for a while so we're probably safe to go." The group seemed hesitant and Haley didn't know what to do in situations like this you were meant to stay put until someone comes for you but on the other hand she wanted to get out of the building as quick as possible. Marcus and Mouth started to stand up so the others joined them slowly, Haley head starting spinning slightly as she got to her feet so she leaned against the wall for support.

"No ones going anywhere" Jimmy said firmly. They all turned around to look at him surprised at his tone and were all shocked to see him holding a gun Haley felt her legs go weak the only thing holding her up was the wall she was leaning against.

"No ones going anywhere" he repeated.


	10. Bullet proof I wish I was

**Chapter 10 - Bullet proof I wish I was**

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"**N**o ones going anywhere" Jimmy repeated, Haley could hold it any more she staggered over to the waste paper bin and threw up. Jimmy pointed the gun at all of them "Don't move." He said.

"I'm sorry I've been ill. I'm ok." Haley said in reply to the worried looks on Skills and Mouths faces.

"All of you to the back of the classroom now." Jimmy demanded although he was slightly shaking. Haley made her way with the others and sat down at a table and Skills put his arm round her shoulder the others were all sitting around the back on the class room all looking pale and scared.

"Jimmy you don't have to do this I'm your friend." Mouth said tears in his eyes.

"You haven't been my friend in a long time, you just forgot about me and moved on." Jimmy replied angrily.

"Oh great so you too had a tiff and you decide to shoot up the school" Marcus muttered sarcastically. Skills looked over at Marcus and muttered

"Keep your mouth shut if you want us to get out of here."

"Stop whispering!" Jimmy shouted making the girls in the room jump.

"It was nothing man, you don't want to do this Jimmy. We used to be friends your not like this" Skills said trying to talk Jimmy down.

"Your right we used to be friends and since then you know nothing about me, what my life's like, you think this is because I lost some friends this is much more then that." Jimmy said with hatred in his eyes.

"Well tell us then what's so bad." Rachel added.

"Ha like I'd open up to you lot three of my ex friends and three strangers." Jimmy replied lowering his arm with the gun slightly as it started to ache from having to hold it up.

"Talking can help, it can make everything seem not so huge as when you keep it to yourself." Haley said and inwardly laughed at herself, how could she even be giving this advice when she hadn't been that truthful lately with the people she loved.

"Because I hate it here, because I hate everyone here. High school it's a joke, is it the best days for anyone. Everyday I come here and I get picked on or teased or ignored and it wears you down." He started off angry but by the end of the sentence he just sounded so sad, his gun was now by his side as he appeared lost in thought. It was in a split second that Marcus jumped up and headed towards Jimmy while the gun was down but as soon as Jimmy saw movement the gun was back up again and Marcus came to a holt just a meter in front of Jimmy.

"Do I need to remind you I have a gun, get the fuck back to where you were." Jimmy shouted again. Marcus just stood there.

"There's six of us I'm sure you can't shoot us all." Marcus said.

"Do you want to try that theory out; huh you want me to see if I can shoot all of you." Jimmy shouted gun still pointed at Marcus' chest.

"For fucks sake just come sit back here now." Skills said firmly. Marcus still stood there for a second before turning and sitting back down at the back of the classroom muttering darkly under his breath but nothing anyone could hear. Haley didn't like how this was going, they couldn't afford to have people keep loosing their tempers.

"They don't all need to be here Jimmy, how about you let them go and we can talk just me and you like old times." Mouth said suddenly speaking up. Haley's heart went out to him he was being so brave, she knew most people overlooked him but Mouth had such a big heart.

"You don't get it Mouth, its not old times everything has changed and it can't all be fixed by a fucking conversation. Nothing in this life is good and there aren't always happy endings so why should this be any different. No one is leaving." Jimmy repeated. The classroom fell into silence no one knew what else to say, there didn't seem anything else that could be said. Haley looked round the room, Mouth was sat at the table next to hers with his head in his hands with Rachel's hand on his shoulder. Abbey was sat at the back of the class room knees pulled up to her chest just staring down at the ground. Marcus was also sat on the floor but in the corner, he kept looking up front and shooting Jimmy dirty looks. Skills was sat next to her keeping his eyes steadily on the front where Jimmy was, ready in case anything kicked off. Haley stared ahead again, she had no idea how this was going to end, Jimmy was refusing to let them go so it seemed that they weren't all going to be able to leave alive.

Haley shivered slightly at the thought but considered it for a second, did she really care if she died, she had been feeling crap lately with being ill and she couldn't remember the last time she had felt truly happy and could she see it getting any better in the near future? These were the thoughts running through Haley's head but as she glanced down at her hand and her wedding ring she felt determined. She wanted to see Nathan again and make things better, she couldn't leave it like this she didn't want to die with her last thoughts being of her regrets. It was stupid she was feeling a lot of the things that Jimmy was, she had been picked on and ignored by the people she cared about but it would never have crossed her mind to do something like this. She was surprised that she wasn't feeling sympathetic towards Jimmy but she wasn't angry with him either, she felt sorry for him he was obviously deeply unhappy and confused. Haley stood up determinedly.

"Jimmy" Haley said looking straight at him "You can't do this." She continued firmly, the others all turning to look at her surprised, gone was the scared look of a minute ago now she looked strong and determined. "It will not make you feel better to hurt us. We all know you're hurting but this is life and bad things happen to good people. They don't deserve it like you didn't deserve to be picked on but this is not going to help. We're just kids and we do and say stuff we don't mean because our hormones are still racing and we haven't learnt how to deal with things properly. You have to let us go Jimmy because we don't deserve this and neither do you." She finished still just staring at Jimmy, he was surprised he had expected this from Mouth or Skills but not Haley and he saw in her eyes something different not just the scared looks like everyone else but a deep pain there too like his eyes. He didn't know what to say he knew she was right.

"I…" Jimmy started but stopped.

"You haven't hurt anyone Jimmy you can stop now before it gets too big." Mouth chipped in also standing up. It was all true Jimmy thought and he didn't want to be here any more, when he had brought the gun in he hadn't really planned what would happen it had just all got out of hand.

"Ok" he said softly "You can go but two at a time and tricks." Haley saw Rachel about to speak presumably to get out first but she knew Abbey was diabetic and she was looking dangerously pale.

"Abbey needs to go first, she needs her insulin." Haley said quickly, Abbey softly smiled up at Haley "You'll take her won't you Skills." She finished and saw Rachel glare in her direction.

"That's fine what ever just take her" Jimmy said still pointing the gun at all of them.

"You going to be ok?" Skills asked Haley he didn't want to leave her here when she was still ill.

"Just go I'll be out in a minute." She replied. Skills walked over to Abbey and helped her up and helped her walk out the room, the door shutting behind them seemed to echo round the silent classroom. Not a second had passed when Rachel spoke up.

"Me and Mouth are going next" She said.

"No your not I'm going out next" Marcus.

"Just let them go next" Haley said she didn't see why they were arguing now, when they were all so close to leaving.

"Whatever" he said angrily walk back to the back of the classroom hitting his fist on a desk.

"Well go then" Jimmy said irritably, he just wanted them all gone he wanted to be alone. Rachel grabbed Mouths hand and started half dragging him towards the door, he seemed reluctant to go, he wanted to some how make his old friend feel better. Rachel finally pulled him out the door, not didn't look back.

"Are we finally allowed to go now" Marcus said moodily, Haley had no idea why he was being so obtuse they were so close to getting out he just needed to keep his mouth shut.

"Just get out of here." Jimmy said sounding weary.

He started walking for the door and Haley followed praying he would keep his mouth shut but just as they were getting to the door he open his mouth again.

"Well it's been fun fat ass but you'll understand if we don't stay in touch" Marcus said sarcastically. Jimmy walked towards them in rage

"You're just as bad as them, even now you can't leave me alone." Jimmy shouted pointing his gun straight at Marcus.

"I.." Marcus didn't know what to say he was stunned to silence for once having the gun so closely pointed at him. Haley stood there frozen wanting to cry in frustration they had been so close to getting out.

"You do deserve this." Jimmy said looking straight at Marcus and pulled the trigger, he was two meters from them. Haley leaned forwards and pushed Marcus out of the way and felt the bullet plunge into her arm before she felt to the ground. She tried to hold on to her injured arm but felt all her strength slowly leave her body. She heard another gun shot and saw as Marcus felt to the ground next to her, his eyes were closed and blood pouring from his chest. She then heard the door open and close as Jimmy left.

"Marcus" Haley whispered "Marcus" But there was no answer and it was all too much for Haley the pain and horror of what had just happened caught up with her and she passed out.


	11. Don’t be Upset

**Chapter 11- Don't be Upset **

**H**aley opened her eyes and found herself in an empty hospital room and for a second could not remember why she was there. She tried to move her arm and felt a searing pain and the memories all came flooding back. There was a clock up on the wall and it said 4pm which meant she had only been out for a few hours.

She had no idea how she had got to hospital and she had no idea how Marcus or Jimmy were. She felt sad when she realised that no one was here with her and there was no evidence anyone had been waiting with her before she'd woken up. She slowly sat up and found she was feeling less ill then this morning but then she supposed they had given her some kind of pain killers.

She found she was in a hospital gown but her clothes were neatly folded on the table by her bed. She got out of bed and tried to quickly get changed although her arm was painful she could still move it slowly. She had been shot in the upper arm but when she put her jumper on you couldn't even tell that a bandage was on underneath.

She didn't waste any time and quickly scanned the room to check she wasn't going to leave any thing behind. She needed to go find Nathan; now that she had survived she needed to go see him this was her second chance. She didn't want to think about any of the stuff that had happened today she just wanted to see Nathan; it was after all her coping mechanism for the last few months to just try and ignore the bad things that had happened.

She walked out of the door and into the corridor she had no idea where she was going so she walked down the corridor until she found a sign which pointed to the lift which lead to the exit.

She quickly followed the signs around a corner and bumped straight into Nathan who grabbed her arm to stop her falling over; luckily it was her good arm. For a second she forgot where she was and why she was there and was just happy to be this close to her husband.

"Thank god I found you." Nathan said looking so relieved. Haley felt her heart leap, he did care and he had come to check she was ok, she also loved the fact he was still handing onto her arm. She felt such relief she hadn't realised she was so worried about no one being there when she woke up until now.

"He's still in surgery and Karen, Lucas, Deb, Peyton and Brooke are in the waiting room." Nathan continued. Haley was confused were they talking about Marcus.

"What?"

"Keith" Nathan said also looking confused "He's been in surgery for an hour and half now and they haven't given us any news. I know Lucas and Karen will be so glad you're here" he said and added more quietly "I'm also really glad you're here its so hard just waiting." Haley was so confused Keith had been shot, when had that happened, why had he been in the building, she was too shocked to even think about why he hadn't asked about her being hurt.

"What happened?" She asked.

"Well no one 100 knows, he went in to building because he knew the gun man was Jimmy and tried to talk him down but Jimmy shot him" Nathan finished sadly.

"How are Skills and Mouth did they get out ok?" Haley asked.

"Yeah I heard they got out fine and their parents took them home which is why they aren't here now. I guess you choose a good day to stay home sick." Nathan finished. Haley just stood staring at him; he thought she was just in shock over the whole situation. He didn't know she was in the school he didn't know she had also got shot. The happiness she had felt earlier when she had run into him was completely gone, she felt numb Keith was in a critical condition and no one knew what she had been through. Nathan broke the silence he was confused, Haley looked like she was just hearing the news for the first time but she must have known or she wouldn't have come to the hospital he knew someone else had been killed but he didn't think Haley knew the guy.

"Are you ok, you look like your hearing this for the first time. You came here for Keith didn't you?" Nathan asked confused. Haley didn't know what to say, she wanted to spill everything to Nathan and cry in his arms but she didn't know if she could be that selfish, Keith had been hurt critically and there were lots of people here who needed her.

"No I was just hoping to hear he was doing better that's all." She answered, she used to be awful at lying but she seemed to be good at it now.

"It's just scary, I mean I was just getting to know Keith properly, Dan never really let me get that close to him and now the thought of loosing him its just so horrible." Nathan said sadly looking down. Haley didn't know what to say, Keith had always been around when she'd been growing up, Lucas and Keith had first taken her camping and it was Keith who had tried to help her beat Lucas at Basketball. Instead of saying anything she just opened her arms and welcomed him into a hug. He didn't notice when she stiffened when he squeezed her arm too tight and all thoughts of Keith and comforting Nathan went out the window for a second.

"We should go to the other." Haley said pulling back, as soon as Keith is doing better I'll tell Nathan about me being shot she thought. It all seemed ridiculously trivial now what she had been through compared to Keith's life hanging in the balance. Nathan looked up and smiled at her slightly.

"Yeah, thanks for being here."

"It's fine" she replied and followed him to the waiting room.

It had been an hour since Nathan and Haley had gone to the waiting room and not much had changed, there had been no news and no one had really been talking. Lucas and Karen were sat together with Deb next to Karen and Brooke and Peyton next to Lucas. Dan was sat next to Deb and Nathan and Haley were sat on the other side of Dan.

Haley was slowly starting to feel quite a lot of pain in her arm because the drugs were wearing off and she should probably be still in her bed but she wouldn't have left for anything and none of the doctors or nurses seemed to notice she was the patient who was missing from her room. It was kind of good as well the pain in her arm was distracting her from the current situation.

She could see Lucas getting more and more frustrated she was surprised he wasn't pacing the room, it seemed the only thing keeping him still was Brooke soothing him by rubbing his leg. A doctor then came up to them.

"Karen Roe" She asked and Lucas and Karen jumped to their feet while everyone else stared intently at the doctor waiting to hear what she said.

"I'm so sorry but we were unable to save him, he lost too much blood and the bullet punctured too many important organs. You can come see him if you want." Karen and Lucas just stood there for a second as if frozen then Karen slowly moved.

"Yes that would be good." She said softly Lucas took her hand and they followed the doctor slowly. As soon as the doctor, Karen and Lucas had left Brooke burst into tears and Peyton comforted her. Deb just stared ahead tears silently rolling down her cheeks. Haley didn't feel anything she turned to Nathan and he looked so lost, she gently guided his head to her shoulder and he cried silently while she stroked his hair. Luckily he was leaning on her good arm; she didn't want this to be the moment he found out about her being shot.

Everything just felt so surreal to her she couldn't believe that it was earlier this morning that she had been in the tutor centre with Jimmy and the gun. It felt like the longest day of her life and here she had Nathan her husband in her arms and although she knew it shouldn't it made her feel a bit happy and even though she was the one consoling him just knowing she could be there for him gave her some comfort. So that's what she did, she concentrated on the pain in her arm and comforting Nathan so she wouldn't think of anything else.

Twenty minutes later Lucas and Karen returned, Karen's eyes were red from crying and Lucas had his arm around her for support, his face was set and held a grim expression. When they got level with them Karen spoke.

"I think I need to just be alone for a bit, I'm going to go for a walk."

"Mum" Lucas started to say.

"Just give me a bit of time" Karen repeated and walked off down the corridor. Brooke and Haley both got up and walked towards Lucas and Brooke embraced him neither girls speaking.

""He looked so serine, you know" Lucas said sadly not really directed at anyone.

"Yeah he's at peace now." Haley said rubbing his arm.

"Do you want to go for a walk, get away from here we can talk." Haley said to Lucas. She knew she could try and help him and if anyone could understand what he was going through then she could and maybe it would help her as well.

"Or we can go back to yours and you can have a lie down it's been a long day." Brooke added. Lucas sighed slightly.

"A lie down sounds good" Lucas said then looked at Brooke and added "Just lying in your arms I need that."

"Come on then I have my car" Brooke said. They slowly walked towards the exit Brookes arms around Lucas and they said a quick goodbye to everyone. Haley stood there feeling hurt, she knew it was selfish and if that's what Lucas needed he should do it but she thought that he would want to talk to her to help him feel better. Peyton broke Haley's train of thought by getting up

"I'm going to go too, I don't like hospitals" Peyton said sheepishly and quickly left. Haley turned around where there was just Nathan, Deb and Dan left.

"I think I should take my mum home." Nathan said to Haley it looked like he had pulled himself together. "I presume you've got a way to get home."

"Yeah" Haley said softly looking down, it was easier that way so she didn't have to explain she come here in an ambulance. Deb and Nathan started walking away and Dan followed behind them and as he passed Haley he made a comment that they couldn't hear.

"Now is defiantly a time for family." He sneered. Haley stood there stunned Dan's brother had just died and here he was making snide comments to the daughter in law he hated. She just stood there and watched them walk around the corner until she was finally alone.

She couldn't believe the day it had been so surreal, she was hoping she could just wake up from it, she was kind of hoping the last few months had all been a dream too. She slowly made her way towards the exit, she didn't live too far away and she needed the fresh air.

When she got back to the flat she rushed to the bathroom and grabbed a bottle of painkillers and took two. Her arm was in agony, she was tempted to go back to the hospital but she couldn't face that place right now and not on her own and as she had no one to go with her she would just have to deal. It was 8pm but she wasn't in the slightest bit hungry at a time like this she would usually listen to music to comfort herself but she knew music would not make her feel any better now so she turned on the television.

She couldn't concentrate on anything though as her arm was throbbing in pain. She couldn't help but cry now and at that moment it wasn't for the people she had lost but simply because her arm was excruciating painful.

At 10 she couldn't take it any more and went to the bathroom and took two more pain killers and carried the bottle with her as she went to the bed room. She lay down on her bed and tried to sleep.

She tossed and turned for hours but sleep would not come and her arm still ached. At 1am she took three more painkillers and half an hour later she fell into a drowsy half sleep where she could still feel the pain in her arm. She managed to stay in that state until the morning.

Over at Nathan's house he could not sleep either. He had never lost anyone close to him before and was having troubles coping with how he was feeling.

He was also feeling disappointed in Haley, he thought she would have offered to come back with them at least to show her support and he had been half expecting her to turn up at the house now for hours but there was no sign of her. He had thought she would need some comfort as well but at the hospital she had not seemed that upset.

He supposed that she was doing ok and that she and Keith obviously weren't that close so it seemed harsh to him that she couldn't be here to support him when he needed it. At two in the morning sleep finally claimed him but he had strange dreams all night where he was chasing Haley down hospital corridors but he could never catch her.

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**Hey hope you guys don't hate me too much, but i assure you everyone will find out about Haley's Parents and Haley being shot eventually.**


	12. I’m Lonely

**I'm glad lots of you are enjoying the story. I know lots of you are saying that Lucas is being a really bad best friend and should have noticed something was up with Haley at the hospital but he was worried about Keith so it's understandable that he was distracted. Also hope the story isn't too depressing and I promise it is going to get happier!**

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**A**fter that first night of little sleep Haley had woken early and although she still felt tired she could not get back to sleep. She had gone to the bathroom and taken a look through the medicine cabinet to see if she could find anything for her arm.

There were the usual pain killers and plasters when at the back she found a prescription bottle. They said they belonged to N Scott so she guessed they were from when he had been in the car accident when he told her not to come home. The bottle was only half used and Haley presumed Nathan being his usual self had stopped taking them earlier then he should because he felt he was recovered.

They were strong pain killers nothing you could get over the counter without a prescription and she knew she shouldn't take other peoples medication but it seemed the best solution to her. The label said take two a day one in the morning and one in the evening so she took one and half an hour later the pain in her arm had lessened.

She didn't know what to do with herself, school had been cancelled for the rest of the week, she wanted to help Karen and Lucas but had no idea how. She thought about going to see them but last night neither one had really needed her and she didn't want to get in the way so she did the next best thing.

She decided she would go open up the café, she had keys as Karen often trusted her to lock up, it would be a little way of helping them and one less thing on Karen's mind. To be honest it would be great for her to work Karen's shifts after not working all last week she really needed the money to cover her rent plus she needed to buy some food.

She knew she could grab some breakfast at work she rang Jack the sous chef and Karen's second in control before going in to explain she would be opening up and getting him to come in, he was happy just to be able to help. She grabbed her coat as it was cold out and left for Karen's. She was able to grab a muffin from yesterday before she flipped the sign and opened the café.

It was approaching 1pm when Deb came in. The morning hadn't been too busy and all of the regulars had expressed their condolences as news spread fast in the small town and they were all saddened to hear of the news of Keith's death.

Deb had been surprised to find the café open and Haley working the idea had only come to her an hour ago and she was slightly put out that Haley had thought of it first. Haley was getting quite tired, she hadn't slept much last night and her arm was aching a bit, she wished she hadn't left the pain killers at home. Deb settled herself in and began serving customers with Haley, although Deb was still being cold with her it was a welcome break to have someone else helping her out.

When it got to 3pm she decided to ask Deb if she could have a break and go visit Lucas and Karen. She walked into the back where Deb was sorting out some food.

"Hey, I was wondering if you could let me go for a few hours to go visit Lucas and Karen." Haley asked slightly timidly, it seemed a bit silly she was asking Deb's permission to leave as she had been the one to open up in the first place but Deb was still technically her boss.

"Oh I'm sorry Haley." Deb said not sounding very sorry. "I was just going to go see them, you are doing so well here and I was going to take them some food. Maybe you can see them later, I'll be back before closing." With that Deb took off out the back door.

Haley sighed she had been working for 6 hours straight and had been really looking forward to the chance of a break plus she wanted to be there for Lucas and Karen. Haley was surprised though she felt a little bit of relief, while she was working she could pretend that Karen was sick and that's why she wasn't working and that everything was fine, the fact that it was busy just meant she didn't have to think about yesterday.

She worked for another two hours and finally it was so quiet she closed up for half an hour and had some lunch/dinner, she hadn't been eating well recently so although she only had some pasta it tasted like the best meal ever.

When she opened up again she kept looking up at the clock checking the time and was surprised that Deb wasn't back yet. At 9.15 when the café was closed and Haley was wiping tables Deb returned. Haley stopped what she was doing to greet her.

"Hey, how are they doing?" Haley asked.

"Oh as well as can be expected, can you make me a coffee please." Deb said sitting down at the counter.

"Sure, how about you are you feeling ok?" Haley asked mostly out of politeness.

"Holding up, you know. It helps being able to look after Karen a bit."

"Yeah, I was thinking of going to visit them when I finish clearing up here." Haley said handing Deb her Coffee and carrying on clearing up.

"I don't think that's a good idea. Lucas had gone to Brooke's for the night and when I was leaving Karen was saying she had had enough visitors for one day." Deb answered.

"Oh ok, I guess I should go see how Nathan is then." Haley said, they had gotten on so well at the hospital

"He went to Peyton's" She answered "You don't mind opening up again tomorrow do you, there's a few things I need to do but I'll come in and join you later." She said smiling at Haley. Deb then left without really waiting for an answer. Haley sighed; she would like to see Nathan but knew she would not get a friendly reception at Peyton's so decided to leave it.

She had finished cleaning up and went behind the counter to get her bag which she had tossed there earlier, she was searching around under the counter which was a bit of a mess when she noticed a photo. It had been taken just two weeks earlier it was of Karen in Keith's arms smiling madly and just off in the corner you could see Haley smiling at them.

She remembered it being taken, Lucas had come in from seeing Brooke and Karen and Keith had been tidying up the café after closing. Lucas had taken the picture while Karen and Keith were messing around like school children and Lucas and Haley had been teasing them. It had been a nice moment for her, she had felt part of a proper family again just for a little while.

She looked at the picture and couldn't hold it in any more, she started to cry and sunk to her knees, she missed Keith, it was him that sat with her at the basketball games when Karen was working it was Keith who would stick up for Haley when she was younger and the river court boys good naturedly teased her.

She continued to cry under the counter until the tears refused to come any more. By the time she had finished crying her head was pounding, she always got a head ache after crying and she was exhausted. She hauled herself up and walked over to one of the sofas telling her self she was only going to rest for a few minutes before her walk home but before she knew it she had drifted off to sleep.

Half an hour later Haley woke up with a start scared out of her mind. She had had a nightmare where she had been back in the tutor centre reliving the moment Marcus and her were shot only in her dream Jimmy just kept shooting both of them.

She was confused for a second until she realised she was in the café. She got to her feet and realised she was covered in sweat, she grabbed her coat and locked up before walking home.

When she arrived home she was still tired but she did not want to go back to sleep afraid of having another dream. Instead she had a shower and grabbed some homework which she had piles of. It was 3am when she could no longer go on with homework as she was so tired, she went into her bed room and set her alarm before she feel asleep almost instantly.

She woke up on Wednesday and felt tired, she'd had another bad dream last night and when she'd finally got back to sleep her dreamless sleep was interrupted by her alarm going off. She went and showered and took another of Nathan's Pain killers and put the bottle in her bag in case she needed another one while she was working.

The day of work was pretty much the same as the last with people coming in and giving their condolences. Deb came in again at 1ish and helped her for a bit, at 3 Haley went into the kitchen to once again ask if she could have some time off to go visit Karen and Lucas.

"I'm sorry Haley but I was just about to go." Deb replied when Haley asked.

"Yes but you got to go yesterday and I haven't seen them since Monday." Haley replied knowing she sounded slightly childish.

"Well I would but Karen wanted me to help with funeral arrangements." Deb said. This is stupid Haley thought she shouldn't be here working they could close the café for a few hours without causing any problems. As if sensing what Haley was about to say Deb said

"Karen is so grateful though for all you've been doing she says it's a massive help." That silenced Haley she didn't want to disappoint Karen.

"I'll see you later then" Haley said.

"Yes later." Deb replied distractedly from the looks of it she was back on the prescription drugs, she hoped Nathan was ok. The rest of Wednesday went quickly and much the same as before. After seeing Deb's behaviour Haley had restrained from taking another pain killer even though her arm was hurting.

She was generally exhausted but when she started working if she just went into automatic work mode she could get through it. Deb did return at the end of the day again and told her Lucas and Karen had gone out somewhere together and that Nathan was with Dan so there was no point seeing any of them.

Haley tidied up quicker that night and did not sit down until she got home afraid she would fall asleep again in the café. She had eaten at work and so when she got home at 10 she had got down to homework.

Again when she could stay awake no long she went to bed and had another restless night full of nightmares of the shooting.

Thursday was much the same apart from Deb didn't come in but phoned instead to say she had other stuff to do and it would mean lots if Haley could work all day.

Haley had agreed and the day had gone by in a blur. She was just sweeping up at closing time when she heard the door open, she guessed it was Deb but when she looked up she found it was Karen. Haley dropped her broom and ran over and hugged her.

"It's so good to see you, I'm sorry I haven't come to see you. I know I'm so awful." Haley said quickly. Karen just gave her a small smile.

"It's ok Haley from the sound of it you've been running this place single handed and I can't thank you enough." Karen said kindly, Haley blushed glad someone had noticed all the work she'd been doing.

"How are you holding together?" Haley asked her as they went and sat at the counter.

"I'm still not good, it hasn't really sunk in yet, I guess that's what the funerals for. It's on Sunday." Karen said sadly her eyes getting slightly teary "It's good to leave the house I've been going crazy over the last two days." Haley smiled at her sympathetically

"I am really sorry I haven't been over. How's Lucas?" Haley asked.

"He's doing ok but how about you you're looking very pale and tired." Karen said looking concerned.

"Don't worry about me, you know it's just been a long couple of days, I'm fine just happy to be able to help." Haley said earnestly "I'm a bit surprised though I thought Luke would want to talk to me about this stuff as I kind of have experience" Haley said trailing off. Karen looked at her sadly.

"You shouldn't have lost someone else so soon Haley and I think Luke's head is a little all over the place at the moment he's not thinking straight." Karen said.

"I guess I should just be happy he's got someone who can help him through this" Haley said with only a hint of jealousy in her voice partly because it wasn't her who was there for Lucas and partly because she wished she had someone.

"Me and Lucas have been talking and were going to go on a bit of a road trip from Monday for a few weeks. We need to get away from here for a while and look at some colleges for Lucas and we were wondering if you would like to come with us, as it's a family trip." Karen asked her. Haley felt tears come to her eyes again and she thought about how wonderful a trip right now would be with Karen and Lucas but she knew she couldn't.

"Karen you don't know how great that sounds but I just have too much school work to do I'm already behind. I can't take the time off" Haley said sadly.

"I thought you might say that, well I've hired some part time staff for the café from next week so you only need to do your normal shifts and if you wanted you could stay at ours." Karen offered she could see Haley looked tired and thin and she was worried about her.

"I would take you up on that but I'd still have to pay rent so I may as well stay in the flat. Plus it would be weird being in your house without you and Lucas there. I will check up on it though make sure its ok." Haley said. Karen smiled at her again she loved the way Haley was always doing things for other people always trying to help.

"I found this." Haley said getting up and bringing Karen the picture she had found the other night "It's such a great picture." Haley gave it to Karen and smiled sadly. Karen looked at the picture for a few minutes in silence as tears rolled down her cheeks.

"It was just so sudden." Karen said sadly.

"I know one minute everything's normal and the next they're gone." Haley looked down letting a few tears escape her eyes. Karen got up and hugged Haley.

"I know this is going to be hard for you Haley I know you haven't been to the cemetery since the summer but we'll get through this together." Karen said gently.

"You don't need to look after me on Sunday ok, I wouldn't do that I know it's going to be so hard for you too but just don't worry about me ok. You need your closure." Haley said looking up at her, she appreciated so much what Karen was doing for her but on the day of Keith's funeral she did not want to be a burden on Karen.

"Ok" Karen said. "Have you been talking to Nathan much have you thought about telling him about your parents?" She asked gently.

"I'm always working or he's with Peyton or his dad so I don't seem to be able to see him, I think we are ok though, we're friends." Haley said trying to sound happy about it "and now's not a good time to bring up stuff like that." She finished sighing.

"Ok" said Karen she knew it was best not too push these things. "I'll send Lucas over to give you a hand here, I know Deb's not being great at the moment."

"Well everyone's dealing with it in their own way but don't force Lucas to come over if Brooke's helping him then just leave it be." Karen just nodded.

"It looks all done here how about I give you a lift home." Haley just nodded. She felt happier though that Karen seemed to be dealing with things and she was glad that someone had come to see her to make sure she was ok.


	13. Hide and Seek

**Chapter**** 13 - Hide and Seek **

**I**t was the morning of the funeral and Haley did not want to go at all. It was a grey day and there was a light drizzle. She was still having nightmares every night but they had changed slightly now instead of Marcus falling dead next to her it was always her parents or Keith.

The rest of the week had been pretty much the same she went to work all day had a bit to eat and came back in the evening and did homework before she went to bed late and tried to sleep. When Karen had said it would be hard for her to go she had not believed her but now she knew Karen was right.

She didn't want to be dealing with this she didn't want to feel the emotional pain so that morning she didn't take any pain killers, she was hoping her arm would distract her from what was actually going on. Although her arm was hurting less and less as the week went on it was still aching and it didn't help that she wasn't resting it because of her work at the café.

She arrived at the cemetery with 5 minutes until the start and she could see everyone milling around over by the freshly dug grave where the coffin was although no one appeared to be saying much, she paused not wanting to go join them yet.

It was still drizzling and most people had umbrella's Haley hadn't bothered it wasn't raining too heavily and the damp feeling suited her mood. She saw them slowly going to take their seats with Karen, Lucas, Deb, Dan and Nathan at the front. She saw there was a space in between Karen and Nathan and guessed it was for her but she hesitated not sure she wanted to be so close to the coffin.

She was quite relieved when she saw Deb move from her place at the end of the row next to Dan to sit in her seat, there was no way she was going to sit next to Dan so she sat in the third row back next to Skill's who had Bevin on his other side.

Skills had come and visited her on Friday at the café to make sure she was ok after the shooting. She had told him that she hadn't really been thinking about it which was true and that it didn't seem to be affecting her which was a lie.

They went on to talk about Lucas and how he'd been keeping to himself pretty much all week. They had also talked about Keith for a little bit then he had left but Haley had appreciated him coming to visit her and given him a big hug before he left.

"How are you doing?" He asked her quietly.

"I'm ok." She replied "You."

"Ok." He replied and then the service started.

It was a lovely but sad service and Dan and Lucas both spoke about Keith. Although Lucas' speech was full of love and about fond memories Haley could pick up on the angry undertone in his voice.

It felt weird and unreal to Haley she hadn't spoken to anyone but Karen, Skills and Deb since Monday at the hospital. She felt like she was going to cry most of the way through the service but every time she would concentrate on the pain in her arm and it would distract her from her feelings.

She didn't know why but she didn't want to let herself cry. The service finished and the coffin was lowered into the ground and everyone went to the front to go speak to Karen and Lucas.

When Haley got to the front she just gave Karen a big hug and a small smile she didn't need to say any words of condolence to the women as they had already talked the other day.

She next spoke to Lucas who pulled her into a big hug, although her arm was hurting she didn't mind as it was so good to see Lucas again and being in his arms was comforting.

"Hey Buddy." He said "Shall we head back to mine." Haley nodded and followed him to his car, there was going to be a small wake after the funeral at Karen's. Brooke had already gone with Peyton, Rachel and Nathan so it was just the two of them in the car. Karen was going with Deb and Dan. Lucas paused when he got to his car and turned to Haley with a serious expression.

"Do you want to do anything else while we're here, I could come with you?" Lucas asked looking off in the direction of her parents graves. Haley looked down then back up at Lucas.

"No this is Keith's day its fine don't worry about that." Haley said getting into his car and quickly putting her seatbelt on . They stayed in silence as they drove towards Lucas' house. Haley decided to break the silence it seemed like forever since she had last seen him.

"I'm sorry I haven't seen you in a while I hear you've been in good hands though." Haley said

"Yeah Brooke's been great and I'm sorry I didn't come see you at the café stuff's just been a bit crazy lately, I hardly know where I am half the time. Thanks though for being at the café I know it's meant so much to my mum." Lucas said half smiling.

"I'd do anything for you two you know that. I wish I was coming on your trip but I have too much work." Haley said sadly.

"How's catching up going?" Lucas asked glad they could turn to a topic that wasn't painful.

"It's ok actually; I'm getting quite a lot done at the moment. Give me two weeks and I should be caught up. I might even still be able to be valedictorian if I continue to work hard." Haley said, she didn't tell him that the reason she was getting so much work done was because she wasn't sleeping because of her nightmares.

"I guess I'm going to have to talk to all the people in there aren't I?" Lucas asked sadly as they pulled up outside his house.

"Any time you want to get out of there just give me a sign and we can leave or I'm sure Brooke will leave if you want her too." Haley said, she knew he would rather leave with Brooke but she wanted him to know she would be there for him too if he needed it.

"Thanks." He smiled again at her. They walked up to the house together and just before he opened the door she hugged him again and had to restrain herself from breaking down in his arms.

"I'm going to miss you so much." She whispered. Lucas just stroked her hair and kissed the top of her head. The thought of Karen and Lucas being gone suddenly felt really scary to her, she knew it was only a few weeks but they were practically the only two people she was on good speaking terms with.

She finally let go of him and went inside, Lucas went off to find Karen and Haley went over to a corner where Nathan Brooke Rachel and Peyton were sitting.

"Hey" she said softly. They all smiled at her softly. They were in a middle of a conversation but Haley wasn't really paying attention, she arm was really aching and she was beginning to wish she had brought the pain killers with her. She was just staring out the window when what Brooke was saying caught her attention.

"and she was shot in the arm but she disappeared from the hospital before they could find out who she was as she had no id on her."

"They don't know who she was, that's stupid surely they know who was in the building." Nathan said slightly irritated.

"Well that's the thing they didn't find her and Marcus until a few hours later when only the police were around so there was no one at the scene to identify her. Plus they had no idea how many people were in the building that day." Brooke said her eyes twinkling slightly as she loved gossip. Haley started to feel sick she didn't want anyone to find out right now that it was her and with Rachel just next to her she couldn't help but think she would make the connection any second now.

"I'm sorry Brooke but I don't think now is an appropriate time to talk about the shooting." Haley said sternly Brooke looked slightly taken back by her tone and sudden participation in the conversation. "I need the toilet." Haley said and got up and left.

Haley went to the Bathroom but found no painkillers; so she just splashed some water on her face. She looked in the mirror and was surprised to see how pale she looked and she had big bags under her eyes. She sighed there was no way she could go to school looking like this they would pull her into the principles office so quick, so she decided to buy some foundation later.

She was walking out of the bathroom head down when she bumped into someone with her bad arm, she groaned in pain and looked up to see it was Rachel she'd bumped into. Rachel was staring at her very strangely then a knowing smile suddenly appeared on her face and she walked off to the bathroom before Haley could say anything to her.

Haley went back and sat with Nathan, Brooke and Peyton and waited nervously for Rachel to get back. Rachel returned 5 minutes later but said nothing about what she had just found out.

Haley sat there for another 10 minutes sure Rachel was just about to spill the information but then it dawned on her that there was no way Rachel was going to tell anyone. Rachel hated her and wouldn't want Haley to get any more attention then necessary. Haley let out a small sigh her arm was still aching but she realised she was really hungry.

"I'm just going to get some food." Haley said to the others even though she hadn't been joining in their conversation.

"Yeah I'm going to get some too." Nathan said joining her. As they were walking away she heard Rachel say bitchily

"I don't think it's an appropriate time to eat."

There was a buffet set out in the kitchen and it was pretty quiet in there and looked like most people had already eaten who were going to. They both picked up plates and got some food before standing around in the kitchen.

"I'm sorry I haven't been there for you much week. I've been really busy with work." Haley said, it seemed that's all she was doing at the moment was apologising.

"It's ok my mum told me and I've had Peyton she's been great. Plus Rachel was in the tutor centre so we've been looking after her which has been a good distraction." Nathan said picking at his food.

"Yeah poor her" Haley said without much feeling, she wondered what he would say if she told him right now that she had been too. As Haley stood in the kitchen a feeling of dread came over her, she was tired and her arm ached and she was reduced to have stilted conversations with her husband.

The tears poured down her face before she could try and stop them and her hand came up to cover her face. Having not spoken to Haley all week Nathan had followed her into the kitchen to find out how she was doing, she looked awful but then she had been working all day everyday last week. When Haley started crying he reacted without thinking and pulled her into his arms.

"I'm sorry." Haley muttered between sobs. "I'm just so tired" Nathan rubbed her back muttered soothing things. When she had calmed down a bit he sat her down on a kitchen chair and crouched in front of her.

He gently used his thumb to wipe the tears from her cheeks, Haley just stared into his eyes, she just wanted to forget everything so she moved her head forwards and kissed him. Nathan kissed her back and for a few seconds all she could think about were Nathan's soft lips on hers. They were broken out of their kiss by Deb's arrival in the kitchen and Nathan moved almost guiltily away from Haley.

"Do you think that is appropriate?" Deb asked crossly "There people here who are very upset and they don't need to see a pair of hormonal teenagers." With that she left the kitchen sighing as she left. Both Haley and Nathan felt guilty, also Haley was worried about Deb her behaviour had been very uneven lately and she was worried how it was affecting Nathan.

"Is Deb ok? She's seemed a bit off at the café." Haley asked carefully.

"Well of course she would be Keith just died." Nathan said sounded a bit defensively.

"I'm just a bit worried that maybe she was back taking medication she shouldn't be." Haley said. Haley at once regretted asking him as he had such an angry look on his face.

"She's fine ok, she's a bit off because of Keith's death and that's all. Don't even pretend like you care, I haven't seen you all week and now you go making cruel accusations." Nathan said angrily and turned and walked out she tried to call out to him but he ignored her.

She sighed and went to find Karen how could they have gone from kissing to fighting in such a short space of time. She found Karen and apologised but said she wanted to leave. Karen thanked her for coming and told her anytime when she was away to ring if she needed to.

Haley thanked her again and gave her a big hug. Haley stopped off on the walk home and bought some foundation for school tomorrow.

It was 3pm when she got home so she did some homework but she couldn't concentrate she was too angry. She had only been trying to make sure Nathan was ok earlier and he had blown up in her face. She decided to watch tv instead and turned on and watched MTV.

It was mindless television and that's what she needed at the moment.  
She continued watching late into the night even thought she knew she had school the next day but lately she hated going to bed. She eventually fell asleep and had another night full of bad dreams.

School the next day was surreal. In the halls everyone was quieter then usual and entering the school were metal detectors and bag searches.

She was so tired from her lack of sleep that the day went by in a bit of a blur, she had enough concentration in class to make notes and in the hall way she was just like a zombie, functioning enough to go to her locker and get what ever books she needed. At one point she passed Nathan who was walking with Rachel and he just looked past her with a firm look on his face while Rachel smirked.

This upset Haley but she was too tired to chase after him and apologise so she just left it, that was how she was functioning at the moment just leaving everything and hoping it would all sort itself out.

At the back of her mind she wondered though how long could she keep going on like this. She knew she couldn't but didn't know how she could end the rut she was in. The café was busy as word had spread round now that the café wasn't closed even though Karen was away. Haley was immensely glad she had bought and put on some foundation earlier she looked just about normal now and certainly no customers seemed to notice anything was wrong with her.

The help Karen had hired was a friend of Deb's called Mary which meant every time she made a mistake or if she wasn't smiling enough when serving the customers Mary would criticise her.

At lock up time Haley was at the end of her tether not only had she made Haley do all the bad jobs because she said Deb had put her in charge but she left at closing time with out helping clean up because she said she needed to go home and see her children.

Haley wouldn't really have minded because she found it easier tidying up with out Mary in the way but she took all the left over food home with her leaving nothing for Haley.

Luckily by now Haley had a bit of spare money so she bought some groceries on the way home although she only had enough money to but herself breakfast and dinner for the rest of the week. When she got home she made herself some Mac and cheese and spent the rest of the evening and into the night doing her homework.

The week passed in a whirl of bad dreams, homework and working at the café. Nathan still wasn't talking to her and she hadn't made any effort to talk to him either although she hadn't been making an effort with any one.

She would smile in the corridors to Skills and Mouth and if stopped the conversations were always short and awkward as Haley could never think of anything interesting to say. It was Friday of the first week back at school since the shooting and Haley's arm was feeling quite a lot better she had checked under the dressing and the wound didn't look infected or anything.

She was also only taking one of Nathan's pain killers a day now for the pain which was good as she only had a dozen or so left.

It was before classes had started for the day and the corridor was quite empty, she was walking to her locker and she saw Nathan walking towards her with Rachel and Peyton and as usually he ignored her.

It didn't faze her any more she was used to this treatment and in a way she preferred it at lease then she didn't have the effort of having an awkward conversation with him. She had just got to her locker when she felt herself be sharply turned around.

"Haley what the hell is wrong with you. I thought you wanted your husband back I thought you cared about him." Peyton angrily said to Haley. Haley just stood there surprised at the irritated girl in front of her. Haley didn't say anything so Peyton continued.

"He's not going to wait around forever Haley and why should he when his wife obviously doesn't' care about their relationship or about him. You couldn't even apologise to him or try and explain why you said stuff about his mum. Why even come back if you're not going to fight for him." Peyton finished still looking extremely pissed off.

Haley still didn't know what to say how could she explain to Peyton that she was having trouble putting one foot in front of the other let alone talking to people let alone talking to Nathan.

"It's complicated." Haley said trying to explain.

"No it's not" Peyton said interrupted still angry "If you love him then you need to fight or you will lose him for good." Haley just stood there saying nothing. Seeing that Haley wasn't going to say anything else Peyton stormed off sighing loudly.

A few tears slipped from Haley's eyes but she wiped them away quickly she couldn't help but think maybe this was all her punishment and she deserved all the bad stuff that had happened to her. It was probably better off that she didn't have Nathan as she obviously didn't deserve him.

* * *

**Ok so very sorry to end it on such a depressing note but tomorrow's chapter is going to be good and lots of Haley's secrets are going to come out. Just a few things but I'm afraid to say but Marcus is dead. Most of you aren't very happy with Lucas but just to say again he has been grieving. Also thank you so much for the reviews and also a lot of you write long reviews which are great and I really enjoy hearing what you're thinking about the story.**


	14. I'm Not Ok

**Chapter 14 - I'm Not Ok**

**I**t had been a month since the shooting and Haley was lying awake in her bed. It was 7am and she was exhausted. She had awoken 2 hours earlier from another bad dream and she had been too scared to go back to sleep, her mind just refused to switch off even though her body ached with tiredness.

Another reason she couldn't sleep was the aching in her stomach because although she had worked yesterday Deb had been in charge. Karen and Lucas were still away on their trip and Deb never let Haley take food with out paying. Deb had always been very cold towards Haley since she had been back but lately Deb had been worse, she had been behaving irrationally and always seemed distracted.

Haley guessed that Deb was back abusing prescription drugs, she presumed Nathan must have suspected something too and that's why he had got so cross when she'd tried to talk to him about it at the funeral.

Since the shooting she hadn't seen that much of him but when she had he had always been with Peyton and Rachel which she knew was kind of her fault but she didn't have the energy to make an effort with him. Haley's alarm went off and she slowly got out of bed little knowing that was the last time she was ever going to sleep in it.

She had a quick shower and put on some clothes, her arm had pretty much stopped hurting now which gave her little comfort as now the physical pain was gone it just left the emotional pain.

She wouldn't have thought it was possible but since the shooting she had felt more alone then at the beginning of year. Lucas had been away for the past few weeks and she didn't have the energy to talk to Peyton or Brooke not that they seemed to make much effort to talk to her. Skills and Mouth were the only ones that really seemed to talk to her any more but they kept wanting to talk about the shooting and that was the last thing Haley wanted to think about.

She wanted to talk to Nathan but ever since the funeral he seemed to be ignoring her. Once dressed she grabbed her bag and headed straight out the apartment. She didn't bother getting any breakfast as she knew the cupboards were empty. Deb was working later but she was locking up so she knew she'd be able to sneak a little something.

She shivered slightly as she got outside; wishing she'd had been able to afford a thicker coat and started the 30 minute walk to school.

Skills walked out of class towards his locker and smiled to himself, it was the end of the school day and that meant he was seeing Bevin.

He was at his locker putting his books away when he saw Haley at hers just a few meters away. She looked so pale and tired he thought, it didn't really surprise him as he had also been in the tutor centre when it had happened and it was still affecting him.

He looked across from Haley down the pretty empty corridor and saw Nathan, Brooke, Rachel and Peyton. Nathan was looking angry with his body facing the opposite way to Haley, Peyton was getting stuff out of her locker and Brooke and Rachel kept shooting cross looks over at Haley.

He felt sad for Haley that Nathan and her still hadn't worked things out but it's only a matter of time he hoped. He looked back inside his locker and smiled when he saw the big chocolate muffin Bevin had made for him, he loved her so much. He looked over at Haley, she looked so small he grabbed the muffin and walked over to her.

"Hey Haley, how's it going?" Skills asked when he was next to Haley. She jumped slightly obviously she was off in her own world.

"Hey Skills" she replied "I'm good" she lied. It was what she replied when ever anyone asked her how she was it was an automatic response. Skills held out the muffin towards her.

"Do you want this, Bevin made loads this morning and I thought I would share the love." Haley looked down at the muffin; she then grabbed it and pulled Skills into a big hug. Rachel looked over in disgust. Haley pulled away and smiled up at Skills with her first proper smile in so long. It made Skills smile too seeing her so happy.

"What can I say I know what women want" he said.

"Thank you so much Skills you have actually made my day" Haley said still smiling.

"Well at least you're still nice to some guys" Rachel called over bitchly. Nathan sighed he didn't want a fight started in the middle of the corridor and it hadn't escaped him how fragile Haley looked at the moment. That's why he had been avoiding looking at her a minute ago.

"Bitching at me isn't going to make it any more likely that my husband will screw your plastic ass" Haley spat back, she was used to Rachel being a bitch and just the thought of having this muffin gave Haley the energy to bother responding to Rachel. Rachel angrily stormed over to where Haley was and grabbed the muffin and chucked it in the nearest bin.

"I wouldn't be eating that muffin if I was you or Nathan will never want to sleep with your fat ass again." Rachel replied.

She knew Haley wasn't fat, especially at the moment but calling others fat was her defence mechanism. Haley just stared at Rachel and felt like she was going to cry. A piece of food had never meant so much to her before but her sadness quickly turned to anger.

"What the hell is your problem" Haley screamed. Rachel stepped back, she had never seen Haley look that angry. Brooke and Nathan looked taken aback but Peyton walked up next to Rachel also angry.

"What the hell is your problem Haley?" Peyton shouted back "Nathan has really needed you recently, since the shooting." By this point Nathan and Brooke had joined them and were right behind Rachel and Peyton.

They hadn't noticed Lucas walking down the corridor and join them to see what the commotion was. He had only come back last night and had wanted to catch up with Haley quickly before practise. Haley laughed bitterly.

"It's true I haven't been there for Nathan as much as I should have been but none of you have been here for me either." Haley said, she was loosing her temper and was trying to calm herself.

"Well you're the one meant to be building bridges with people you should have made more effort." Peyton said from what she had seen of Haley since she had been back she had not been trying as hard as she should have to win back the people she loved.

"And it doesn't look like you've been that upset Haley, it looks like you've been dealing with stuff really well." Nathan added although he didn't want to gang up on Haley but he didn't like being accused of not being there for her. Nathan joining in on the onslaught was too much for Haley she was seriously pissed off.

"You know I have been dealing with stuff really well because this has been one shitty year" Haley raged taking most of them a bit by surprise but not Rachel.

"Oh boohoo it's your own fault Nathan's not being friendly because you abandoned him and Keith's death has affected everyone." Rachel said snidely.

"That's not all and you know it bitch" Haley said then turned to Nathan "when you bumped into me in the hospital it wasn't because of Keith that I was there, it was because I had been in the tutor centre being help hostage and because I was the mysterious girl shot by Jimmy." She shouted anger radiating off her, if she hadn't been so angry she would have been crying by now.

The other looked at her shocked none of them had had any idea she was in there apart from Rachel and Skills. Skills hadn't had any idea that not one of Haley friends had known she was in the tutor centre, Rachel on the other hand had decided not to mention it when she found out no one knew, she preferred the attention on herself.

Nathan was shocked if he had know Haley his wife was in the building then he would have gone in, no matter how he had recently been feeling, it was at that moment it dawned on him how much the thought of loosing her for good upset him, he didn't think he could stand that. Lucas was also upset, after all Haley had been though that year and she hadn't told him he could have tried to help.

"How could we have known? You never told us. We thought you were ill, you hadn't been in school for days." Brooke argued back defensively angry that Haley was cross at them when they hadn't known.

"And it's not like you lost any one, Lucas and Nathan lost someone permanently and you weren't there to help them through it." Rachel replied also cross, she had been in the tutor centre that day and she had still helped other people, even though her intentions hadn't been that innocent.

"I grew up with Keith as practically my second dad, this year after everything that's happened he was so good to me, I miss him everyday" she said looking at all of them then addressing Lucas she said "I tried to be there for you, I thought I'd be the first person you would come to after this summer but you choose Brooke's comfort over mine every time." If Haley had not been so angry she would not haven been having a go at Lucas at that time. Lucas looked down guiltily.

"I just thought it would be too much for you" Lucas said "I needed someone more neutral who wasn't hurting as much as I was." That pissed Haley off more, how could Lucas even think she would be selfish enough to not let him grieve properly.

"Anyway you abandoned all of us last year and then came back and expected everyone to just forgive you. You've made little effort to hang out with us and basically kept to yourself" Peyton repeated, she knew it was weak to keep bringing it up but it really hurt her when people left.

"Peyton" Lucas said trying to stop her from continuing knowing what the others didn't know. But Peyton ignored him and carried on.

"If you really wanted us back you could have tried harder, you're always off in your own little world, probably wishing you were back on tour. If you don't want to be here so much you should just leave."

"Although I bet Chris wouldn't want you back now" Rachel added meanly. Haley had never felt so angry in her whole life, all her friends apart from Skills were standing there having a go at her with Lucas weakly trying to stop them.

"You really want to know why I left tour, why I've been living on my own and having to work all hours god sends just to pay my rent when I can't even afford food any more. Why I can't sleep because I have hours of homework to do and I also have nightmares from the shooting cause I was left lying in a classroom bleeding with someone dying next to me. Why I can never concentrate as I'm always too tired and hungry. You really want to know why I came back from tour." Haley paused as they all took in what she had just said and all looked alarmed. Lucas knowing what was coming next stepped forwards but Haley backed away from him.

"It's because my parents died in the summer. I wanted to come back to be with the little family I had left. Everybody deserves a second chance; I only wanted to follow my dream but apparently that's me being too selfish.

But you know what I don't need any of you. I'm fine on my own. And you" She turned to Rachel. "I want you to stay the fuck out of my way, all year you've seen stuff happen to me, you knew I was in the tutor centre during the shooting, you knew I was shot in the arm and you knew I had stumbled out onto the beach when I was drunk which was what caused me to be sick for a whole week but you never told anyone. If you even look my way again I will not be held responsible for my actions. I have to get to work and I don't want to see any of you and I don't want any of your pity" Haley screamed and stormed off out of the school leaving them all standing behind shocked.

Haley arrived at work 10 minutes late still just running off the adrenaline of her anger. Deb didn't even notice when she arrived and started work which she counted her blessing for.

She had been working for 15 minutes and was starting to get tired, her big outburst earlier had taken a lot out of her and Deb was not helping with customers but merely fiddling with her purse.

What Haley didn't notice was that there was a gun in the bag, Deb had recently admitted to Dan that it was her that had tried to kill him and so she had purchased a gun to protect herself.

This was not a good idea as in Deb's current state of nervousness and her drug dependency she was very skittish.

When the café was slightly quieter Haley walked up behind Deb to politely ask her to get some more coffee but she startled Deb causing her to knock her handbag off the counter next to Haley, the gun went off loudly startling Haley and the bullet hit her in the leg.

She felt intense pain for a second before it was all too much for her and she passed out.

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**Yay so finally everyone knows everything, hope you're all pretty much happy with how it came out. People were wondering how no one knew that it was Haley that was shot but I think it's just because the people who knew she was in tutor centre presumed that Haley would have said something if it was her. Maybe it is a bit unrealistic but I think what happened is plausible. Also a lot of you are very cross at Peyton and think she's being a bitch which she is but she is still trying to help Haley get Nathan back. She's getting cross at her but only to try and get her to fight for her man, if she was a complete and utter bitch she would have told Nathan to move on which she hasn't been, but your right tough love isn't the best for Haley right now. **

**Now I'm afraid I'm going to be away until Sunday so I will upload another chapter later then on Sunday you'll get two chapters. Thank you again for all the reviews and especially to the people who regularly review my chapters. Also the suggests of how people should find out about Haley being shot were really great as well but unfortunately I already had a plan maybe you guys should write your own stories as your ideas are great. **


	15. First Day of My Life

**Chapter 15 - First Day of My Life **

**T**hey all just stood there after Haley had left too surprised to say anything. Then Nathan slowly turned to Lucas, since Keith's death they had got closer again.

"You knew didn't you, about her parents" Nathan's voice was low but filled with anger. The others turned to look at Lucas.

"She made me promise not to tell, everyone was away this summer when it happened and I only found out when I got back and my mum told me." Lucas explained.

"I knew it, that look in her eyes, she was so sad. And look at her she's a mess, she's pale and tired and skinny. Why weren't you looking after her better Luke?" Nathan angrily accused Lucas trying to rid himself of the deep burning feeling of guilt.

"I was the only one who helped her at all, she was always so busy and since Keith" he trailed off looking guilty. He knew it wasn't his entire fault but he still felt bad, he had been spending too much time with Brooke too caught up being in love.

"I don't mean to interrupt guys but we have cheerleading practise and you guys have basketball" Rachel said, she didn't really care about Haley so the news of her parents death hadn't hit her hard at all. They all turned to look at Rachel, ready to vent their anger at someone.

"You can go, you are no friend of ours anymore. I thought you were trying to help Nathan but you're just a selfish bitch." Brooke said

"None of us want to be your friend so just leave us all alone." Lucas added. Rachel turned to Peyton and Nathan.

"Come on guys, Peyton its not like you would have helped her either she's been a bitch to Nathan and Nathan come on you can have this body why do you want a mess like Haley." Rachel said confidently feeling sure of at least Peyton's support.

"If I knew half that stuff I would not have said a bad thing to Haley. You really are a cold hearted bitch" Peyton said angrily at Rachel and it was true she knew what it was like to loose a parent she would have been there for her.

"I would never choose you ever Rachel, my wife is a hundred times better then you in every way. Like Lucas said don't talk to any of us." Nathan raged.

"Whatever." Rachel replied unfazed and headed off to practise. They all just stared after her all lost in their own thoughts until Nathan broke the silence.

"I can't go to practise now I need to go speak to her, I need to fix this make her feel better again" Nathan rambled. "I don't pity her, I love her. I can help her feel better in time, it took this to realise how stupid I've been. I'm going to go talk to her" Nathan said almost daring anyone to stop him.

"No you're not." Skills said "She doesn't want to see you right now and I kind of don't blame her, sounds like she's been having a bad year. As I'm the only one she's not cross at and I don't have practise I'll go talk to her. Just all go to practise. If she's really bad I'll call you Nathan."

"Fine but I am going to see her later no matter what." Nathan stated as he and the others headed towards the gym he knew Haley needed some time to cool off and at least he knew someone would be there for her.

By the time Skills had got to Karen's the ambulance was there. He saw Karen and went running over.

"What happened?" He asked. Karen looked at him upset.

"It's Haley she got shot in the leg and she's unconscious, I don't know who to ring" Karen replied.

"I'll ring Nathan, go with her in the ambulance and we'll meet you there." He said pulling his phone out of his pocket.

Practise was not going well for the Scott brother's and Whitey had noticed. After they had messed up some easy shots he had assigned the whole team suicides for the rest of practise. They were half way through when Nathan's phone started ringing; he had left it on the bench at the side when Whitey hadn't been looking just in case Skills had needed to ring him.

He was half way across the court but he stopped what he was doing and ran towards the phone ignoring Whitey shouting at him. Lucas also stopped what he was doing and started jogging towards Nathan. Brooke and Peyton also turned to face them.

"Nathan you have to come to the hospital now, Haley's been shot in the leg and unconscious, make sure Lucas and the others come." Skills said in one breath before Nathan could even speak.

"We'll be right there" Was all Nathan managed to say before he put the phone down. "It's Haley. We have to go to the hospital now" he said to Lucas and the girls who were all standing around him. That said he just started walking out of the gym, Whitey who had heard most of the conversation just let them leave. He hoped that this would help Nathan realise that he would lose Haley if he didn't start looking after her.

In the car over Nathan had explained everything he knew and when they arrived at the hospital Karen was there with Skills and Mouth.

"How's she doing?" Lucas asked hugging his mum who had tears streaming down her face.

"They wont tell us anything because were not family" Karen said sadly. With that Nathan stormed out of the room. He came back 10 minutes later.

"I found her doctor, they told me she was stable and that her leg will be in a cast for a few months as the bullet broke the bone. She didn't hit her head but is still unconscious. They recon its stress and she will wake up when she's ready but they don't know when that will be. We should be able to go visit her in a few minutes but the nurse will come tell us when." He said and dropped down into a chair.

"What happened?" Lucas asked his mum. Karen looked over at Nathan and sighed.

"Deb had a gun in her handbag and it appears it fell on the floor and accidentally went off." Karen explained. Nathan's eyes went wide. This was all too much for him today, after finding out all the stuff Haley had been through and how he hadn't helped her. He felt sick, if only he had forgiven her at the beginning of term, he could have helped her through a lot of the stuff.

"She's been under a lot of stress lately; she basically told us she hated us earlier, what if she doesn't want to wake up?" Brooke asked crying lightly in Lucas' arms.

"Don't say that" Nathan shouted. "Her body is just a run down, the doctor said it seems she hasn't been sleeping and she was malnourished so her body needs lots of rest to recuperate. They've put her on a drip."

He looked down guiltily she had obviously not been eating much for a while but his pride had got in the way of him talking to her, he had been to wrapped up in grieving when Keith had died and wondering why she wasn't comforting him that he had overlooked how she was. She hadn't been looking good lately but the way she was acting made it seem like she was fine.

Everyone in the room felt guilty, they had all noticed the change in Haley but other stuff had always come up so they put it to the back of their minds. The nurse then came in and told them that she still wasn't awake but they could go see her two at a time. Karen and Lucas went in first. They went and sat by her bed. She looked so small and pale. Karen started to cry again.

"I know I don't deserve the title at the moment but when you wake up I will be the best friend ever, I will not see Brooke and I will wait on you hand and foot just please wake up and forgive me for being selfish" Lucas pleaded with her, he was so angry at himself for not looking after her better.

"I'm so sorry I should have done more, I've been a very bad second mother to you and I hope you can forgive me. It's going to be my personal mission when you wake up to feed you 10 times a day. Please wake up Haley you're the daughter I never had" Karen said she was feeling guilty for going away with Lucas when at the funeral Haley had looked so run down.

They sat with her a bit longer until it was Skills and Mouths turn to come in. They stayed with her for half an hour just talking about the old times. They felt the least guilty as they had been talking to Haley the most and had not held it against her for leaving. Although Skills was kicking himself for not realising it was Haley that had been shot.

Next Brooke and Peyton came in.

"I know we haven't been very good to you this year so maybe we don't deserve to be here talking to you. Before you went on tour we had fun but this year we kind of forgot you were our friend too not just Lucas and Nathan's." Brooke said stroking Haley's hand.

"I know I was a bitch but I find it hard when people leave. I should have been grateful as you're the only person who's come back. When you wake up you can talk to me about your parents I know what it's like I can try and help. I want to make up for being so horrible when if the position was reversed you would probably always have been nice." Peyton said and looked at the door and saw an impatient Nathan so they left them.

Nathan walked in the room and sat next to Haley.

"I'm so sorry Haley and I know you're probably sick of hearing that today. My stupid pride got in the way and meant I couldn't help you when I really should have.

Not because I pity you but because I love you so much. It's so stupid of me to push you away when all I wanted was you. I understand why you did it all and I'm not cross. When I had that car crash I didn't want you to come back just because you pitied me and I'm guessing that why you didn't tell me about your parents or that you were in the tutor centre.

I just wish we could go back and instead of telling you I didn't want you back I should have let you come and I would have been able to look after you this year." He was holding her hand tightly and a few tears fell from his eyes "I'm going to stay with you until you wake up then I'm not going to leave until your better then I'm going to beg you to take me back" he promised her.

"I love you and I promise it's all going to get better"


	16. Silence is Easy

**Chapter**** 16 - Silence Is Easy **

**N**athan had been sat in Haley's hospital for two days straight before Lucas was able to convince him to go home to shower and change. He was still in his basketball uniform and sweaty from the suicides and Lucas had promised he would stay with her. Although 20 minutes after Nathan had gone Brooke managed to convince Lucas to go to the cafeteria as he hadn't been eating much over the last two days.

It was while no one was in Haley's room that she woke up. She had looked around the room for several seconds before she realised she was in a hospital, it was when she tried to move that she felt the shooting pain in her leg. She felt a strong sense of déjà vu at waking up alone in a hospital room again.

It was then that she remembered what had happened in the café. She found it ironic how she had never seen a gun be shot in real life before and now in such a short time she had been shot twice. In a way it made her feel lucky though, how many people had been shot on two separate occasions and were still alive.

She was surprised when she looked around the empty room that no one was there, she was sure while she had been out she had heard them talking to her. It was then that she noticed something else, she felt full and not extremely tired although she did still feel weak. It was such an incredible feeling for her since she had been feeling awful for weeks. It was then that the nurse walked in and noticed she was awake.

"How are you feeling dear?" the old nurse asked her. She just looked at her; she had no idea how to even begin answering that question. She felt a million things but didn't know which one she felt the most so instead of speaking she just gave the nurse a small smile.

As Nathan had been walking the corridors back to Haley's room he had bumped into Lucas and Brooke. He was not happy. He had expected Lucas to stay in Haley's room the whole time he was away; he had only been gone 40 minutes. Lucas and Brooke muttered their apologies and they all made their way to Haley's room where they were surprised to find a doctor just leaving.

"Ahh Mr Scott, I was wondering where you had gone. Now you wife has woken up and appears to physically be doing fine." The doctor started to explain.

"She's awake" Nathan interrupted excitedly. "What do you mean is she not mentally okay" he asked starting to worry.

"Well she seems fine enough it's just she doesn't appear to want to talk. It may just be because there is no one she really knows in the room. Although she has been through a lot and she may need some time before she feels she wants to talk again. You will all just have to give her time. Now I think she should be able to be released tomorrow as long as we feel there is somewhere she can go where she will be looked after and to make sure she's eating properly." The doctor finished.

"Well as long as she agrees she will come back with me and trust me doctor I will wait on her hand and foot." Nathan explained eagerly.

"Well that sounds excellent, she will need to use crutches when she leaves and stay off her leg as much as possible. You can go in and see her but remember to be gentle with her." He explained and went off to see his next patient.

The three of them entered the room and Haley turned over to look at them. She was worried, what if now they knew she was better they didn't want to talk to her again she also felt embarrassed last time she had seen them she had told them all she never wanted to speak to them again.

Nathan was also nervous, when he had last seen her awake she had wanted to never see him again. He didn't know what to do so he went and hovered next to her bed before suddenly sitting down and squeezing her hand gently. She looked into his eyes and slightly smiled at him, this simple expression made Nathan's heart want to break with joy.

She could have stared into his eyes forever but suddenly getting back the boy she loved reminded her of all she had lost and her smile faltered and she burst into tears. Nathan immediately gathered her in his arms and let her cry into his shoulder while he whispered comforting things to her.

As Haley broke down Lucas when to the other side of her bed and rubbed her back gently, he didn't want to interrupt the moment for them but he wanted Haley to know he was there for her too. After a while Haley's sobs died down and she was just leaning against Nathan who was sat on her bed.

"The doctor said you can go home tomorrow, so I was wondering if you wanted to come back to my house where I can look after you." He asked nervously. She looked at him slightly worriedly after all it had been his mum who's fault it was that she was here. As if guessing what she was thinking Lucas added.

"Deb's not going to be there she's back in rehab, she feels awful about all this"

"I'll look after you so well and you can have all the room you want, my dads not there either so I can just concentrate on looking after you. Is it what you want?" he asked. She just nodded she really wanted to be with Nathan but his complete turn around in attitude towards her was slightly strange after so many weeks of coldness. He smiled back at her slightly sad though that she wouldn't talk to him but he was still so happy she had agreed to live with him.

"And don't worry about Nathan cooking I think Karen intends to be your personal chef until you go to college" Brooke added laughing. Haley smiled it was nice to have people smiling and talking nicely to her, it seemed like a life time ago that she had shouted at all of them. She couldn't be cross at any of them as all she had craved since she had returned was some love and she still felt she deserved their anger for leaving them but a tiny bit of her felt slightly uneasy. A yawn escaped Haley's mouth before she could stop it.

"I guess that's our cue to leave." Lucas said bending over Haley and giving her a kiss on her forehead "We'll be back tomorrow when you're discharged, sleep well." With that Brooke waved and they left.

"I'll go too and get the house ready but I'll be back first thing. Sleep well beautiful" Nathan said also placing a kiss on her forehead. He didn't want to rush stuff. He wanted to show her that he loved her and wanted to take stuff slow. She smiled at him as he left and it wasn't long before she had drifted off into a dreamless sleep.

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	17. Fix You

**Chapter 17 - Fix You**

**T**he next morning Haley woke to an empty room and with how her luck was going it didn't surprise her. At the back of her mind she had always been thinking, when they get over the shock of the stuff that's happened they will remember they don't like me again.

She was just contemplating leaving and stealing some of the drugs she was on so she could have more sleepless nights when the door burst open and Nathan came stumbling in looking askew. His hair was ruffled like he had just got out of bed, his polo shirt was on inside out and the laces on his trainers weren't done up.

"I'm so sorry." He said panting heavily "I slept through my alarm and then when I realised the time and you'd be up I rushed here and I'm sorry I was going to bring you nice breakfast and coffee but I didn't have time and I didn't want you to wake up on your own but you did and I promised I'd be here." He said it all quickly looking down ashamed but looked up when he heard a giggle coming from Haley.

He looked up surprised and saw her just pointing at his top he looked down realised it was on inside out and blushed. Haley just smiled she didn't mind his lateness she was just glad he had come back at all and the idea that he wanted to go to so much trouble was enough for her.

He excused himself and turned around and pulled his shirt off and turned it the right way round and put it back on again. Haley couldn't help but stare even just at his back and arms, she loved Nathan's body and just seeing his naked skin was mesmerising and made her want to touch it. Nathan turned around again fully clothed and caught Haley staring at him and smirked.

"I am so irresistible." He said Haley just gently smiled at him it was just so nice being around him and there being no hate. It was again too much for her though, she hadn't been this happy for a while and she couldn't stop herself from crying.

Nathan was confused one minute she was smiling and laughing and the next she was crying, he didn't say anything though he just walked over to her, sat on the edge of her bed and pulled her into a hug and gently stroked her hair. Unfortunately for Nathan this just made her cry harder in a way she didn't feel like she deserved this comfort from him and she was paranoid that he might change his mind again about his feelings for her.

She was still crying when the doctor and nurse came in to discharge her. Nathan quickly assured them he hadn't done anything and the nurse simply explained to him that it was just that Haley was a bit delicate at the moment.

The doctor examined her and decided she was well enough to go home so everyone left the room while she got changed, the nurse offered to help but Haley just shook her head she needed a bit of alone time to pull herself together. Putting on the clothes on her top half was easy it was just trying to put on some trousers that was difficult, she had a cast on the top part of her leg that went to just below the knee. It took her 20 minutes of trying to realise that she wouldn't be able to put her normal jeans on as the cast was too bulky.

She finally gave up trying and put the skirt on that Karen had brought for her, she didn't want to wear a skirt though it was practically winter and because she hadn't been eating well recently she really felt the cold. It took her 20 minutes to put the skirt on but she was proud because she did it all by herself. She knew there wasn't much she could do to stop her eyes looking red and puffy so she just brushed her hair.

She opened the door signalling for Nathan to come back in and he entered followed by Lucas Brooke and Peyton. She just sat on the edge of the bed feeling a bit shy. Lucas come up to her and gave her a big hug while Peyton and Brooke hung back slightly awkwardly.

"So you're all set to go?" Lucas asked Haley. She nodded and bent down to pick up her bag but Nathan got there first and picked it up.

"We'll take you out of the hospital in a wheel chair and then you can use your crutches." Nathan said and Brooke and Peyton volunteered to go get the wheel chair.

Haley just nodded again. Lucas sent Nathan a worried look, he thought Haley would be talking by now, Nathan was also worried by this but was just happy that she was safe and coming home with him. The car journey back to Nathan's was filled with Peyton and Brooke telling funny cheerleader stories, trying to fill the silence.

Both of them feeling uncomfortable they both felt a bit hypercritical being friendly with Haley now when just a few days ago they were laying into her. They also felt a bit awkward with Haley not talking, it just seemed really weird to them that now they were all finally there for her she wasn't saying anything.

By the time they got to Nathan's Haley was tired again she didn't know if it was the pain medication or just her lack of sleep in the previous months but it was 2pm and she was yawning. She hobbled with the crutches into the house and then felt slightly uncertain of what to do next. The house was massive and she had been told she needed to stay in bed for the next few days but she didn't actually know where her bed would be.

She turned to look at Nathan waiting for him to say anything, he just stood in the hall way with everyone for a second before realising everyone was looking at him and he snapped to action.

"Lucas and I are going to go to yours and grab the rest of your stuff and Peyton and Brooke are going to stay here in care you need anything, I'm sure we won't be long." Nathan said. Haley just stood there and nodded but didn't move she still didn't know where she was meant to be sleeping, Lucas guessing what the problem was stepped in for Haley.

"So where is she sleeping." He asked Nathan.

"Oh right yeah sorry." Nathan replied. "I tidied my room and changed the sheets and stuff so you're in there." Nathan noticed the death stare Lucas was giving him and quickly added "I'm going to be in the guest room just down the hall in case you need anything." Haley just nodded again, her leg was staring to ache a bit with her just standing there so she started to hobble towards the stairs knowing where Nathan's bedroom was.

Although it was weird for her she hadn't been in his house since before they were married which seemed a long long time ago now. Before she had even reached the stairs though Nathan gently scooped her up and started to carry her. Haley blushed slightly loving being in his arms but then it made her feel sad the last time she had been in his arms was at the party where he had rejected her.

Half way up the stairs Nathan felt Haley tense up in his arms, he had no idea why and knew asking wouldn't help so he just gently stroked her arm. The action soothed Haley slightly and made her arm tingle but she knew that she didn't want to try anything with him like kissing him she couldn't bare to be rejected again.

When they got to the top of the stairs he still didn't put her down even though she could have managed, he didn't put her down until he got to the bed where he laid her down tenderly.

"Ok your not allowed to get out of bed, I put this bell by your bed if you want anything just ring it." Nathan said "I presume you just want to get some sleep now so I'll leave you too it." Haley just smiled up at him in thanks and when he closed the door she started the difficult task of undressing. By the time she managed to get out of her clothes she was so exhausted all she put on was one of Nathan's large t shirts to sleep in. When she finally got back into the bed and under the covers she fell asleep straight away.

Haley woke suddenly a few hours later, she had been having her usual nightmares but they still upset her, every time she woke up from them her heart would be racing she was covered in sweat and shaking.

She had been hoping they would have stopped since she was on better terms with Nathan and her other friends and under less stress. She still didn't feel like talking either, she didn't want to have to talk about anything that had happened she just wanted to move on and she guessed at the moment no one would push her to say anything so she just kept her mouth shut and everything was easier.

She was still a bit tired but she still loved the novel feel of waking up and feeling warm and full and not exhausted. She just lay there for a few hours not sleeping but enjoying feeling content, not ecstatic or great but content. Nathan came upstairs at 6pm with a tray full of food for the two of them.

"Now before you get worried I didn't cook this Karen did, she came over earlier but I thought you would be asleep so I said she could see you tomorrow." Nathan said placing the tray on the bed next to her.

Haley just nodded and looked down at the macaroni and cheese, her favourite and smiled. It was nice seeing Haley smile but Nathan didn't say anything he was kind of getting used to Haley not talking and as long as she was happy for the mean while he was also happy.

"I thought maybe we could watch a movie, I have all three Lord of the Rings extended films." Nathan said he knew ages ago Haley had wanted to see them and he didn't really want to sit in silence with Haley or talk when she wasn't.

Haley just nodded, she couldn't help but feel a bit stupid all she seemed to do at the moment was nod at everything but she defiantly preferred it to actually talking to people. Nathan went over and pulled the fellowship of the rings out of a draw and put it in the DVD player. He had brought the big tv into his room when he knew Haley was coming as he knew she needed bed rest and he didn't want her to get bored.

They both sat on the bed eating their food and watching the film, Haley didn't have that big an appetite though, after not eating much for so long her stomach had shrunk and so she was struggling with the food in front of her. Nathan noticed her struggling with the food and rubbed her shoulder encouragingly.

"It's going to take some time before your back to normal" he said he wanted to say a lot more but he didn't want to upset her. He was cross at himself he had seen her get thinner and thinner but he hadn't done anything, it made him determined now to look after her.

When Haley's plate was half finished she put her fork down and leaned back, as she had taken so long eating Nathan had already finished, he took the plate off her and leaned back next to her. It was distracting for her being so close to him, only their shoulders were touching but any contact with him was great for her.

She didn't really watch any of the film instead she just thought about Nathan, wondering if they could ever go back to how they were. She was getting tired again but she didn't want to sleep she was scared of the nightmares that always came when she slept. By the time the film had finished 3 hours later Nathan was fast asleep.

Haley loved lying there just watching him sleep he looked so peaceful she wondered when they would next both be lying in a bed properly together. Even with Nathan peacefully asleep next to her she couldn't risk going to sleep so she decided to try and take the plates down stairs and clean them.

She didn't want Nathan doing all the work she was worried like Lucas when she was sick he would get tired of looking after her. It wasn't too hard for her to gather the two plates and put them on the tray and she managed to hop along to the top of the stairs but then she was stuck. Instead of trying to hop down the stairs she slowly manoeuvred herself down and holding onto the tray tight she carefully slide down the stairs on her bum.

She got back up when she got to the bottom of the stairs and started to hop towards the kitchen she silently cursed Nathan for having such a big house. When she finally got to the kitchen she leaned against the counter for a second to catch her breath. She hadn't really come that far but she was exhausted already and her leg was aching a bit.

She had been given pain killers this time which she took 3 times a day before meals. She hopped over to the sink and starting running water, she filled the sink to the brim and started washing up. It didn't take her long but because of her standing on one foot she managed to get water all over the floor. She was just drying one of the plates when she slipped on the wet floor and sent herself crashing to the floor plate in hand.

It was only a matter of seconds before Nathan was running down the stairs to her side, the crash had woken him up and after seeing Haley was not in the bed next to him he had run down the stairs to the crashing sound. He picked her up and put her on the counter she was cradling her hand which had been cut when the plate in her hand had broke as it hit the floor.

Apart from the cut across her palm Haley was fine she had always been clumsy so she had gotten good at bracing herself when she fell. Nathan went over to the sink and grabbed a tea towel and gently pressed it on Haley's hand.

Nathan started to pace up and down in front of Haley, Haley just looked down at her hand she could tell Nathan was cross so she just watched her cut fill with blood and at the last moment before it spilt over onto the rest of her hand she would mop it up.

"Haley." Nathan said loudly not quite shouting. "You need to be careful. You don't need to be doing dishes I'm here to look after you; you have to let me look after you." Haley couldn't help the tears that slid down her cheeks; it wasn't because of the pain of the cut because that was only stinging slightly it was because Nathan was shouting at her. Nathan turned and saw her crying and it made his anger melt. He walked up to her and brushed the tears from her cheeks with his thumb. He then held her cheek and made her look in his eyes.

"I'm sorry I got cross, I just don't want anything to happen to you. You've been through enough." Nathan said softly. He leaned his forehead against hers and stroked her hair to sooth her. She wanted to apologise to him for making him worry but she didn't say anything she just lightly squeezed his hand with her uncut hand. She wanted to stay like that forever just staring into his brilliant blue eyes. Finally he pulled back but still kept his hand in hers.

"I should take you upstairs; the doctor said you needed rest." He scooped her up again and she enjoyed having her head rested on his chest so she could smell his scent. She almost felt relaxed in his arms but the thought of going to bed ruined the sensation, she did not want to go to sleep. Nathan left her in his room to get ready for bed and then came in again when she was in bed.

"Sleep well." He said and leaned down and kissed her forehead, it felt weird her being there but them not sleeping in the same bed.

Haley just smiled up at him, it was a fake smile though this was her worse time of the day she hated the night when she was meant to sleep. Nathan left the room and she listen while she heard him go down stairs and she could faintly hear the sounds of him playing on a basketball computer game.

She felt slightly annoyed that he had made her go to bed when he hadn't gone to bed yet especially as it was a week night and he had to go to school the next day. She was taking the rest of the week off and Lucas had promised to bring her her homework. She was still awake when Nathan went up to bed and she closed her eyes and pretended to sleep when he looked in on her.

She heard him go to the spare room down the hall and get into bed. She didn't fall asleep until early in the morning when she could no longer keep her eyes open although she didn't stay sleeping for long before she woke from another horrible nightmare.

She just lay in bed while her heart beat painfully in her chest and she felt slightly sick. She pulled herself out of bed and down the hall where Nathan was, she just wanted to be in his arms and for him to tell her it was going to be ok.

When she got to the room Nathan was fast asleep and she couldn't bear to wake him, she shivered slightly but didn't want to go back to bed and sleep so she went over to a chair by his bed and just watched him sleep. He looked so peaceful and she was envious that most people could sleep soundly at night.

At 7am Haley hobbled quietly back to her room and got into bed the familiar feeling of tiredness back. She didn't know what to do she didn't know how to stop her nightmares and she didn't want to talk about them. She heard him get up half an hour later and get ready, he peeked in at her before going down stairs but she pretended to be asleep. Nathan appeared in her room 20 minutes later carrying a breakfast tray with two bowls of cereal and some toast.

"Wake up sleepy head, I know you need your rest but you also need to eat too so you can go back to sleep when you've finished." Haley pretended to wake up and Nathan put the tray down on the bed, she was still really tired but she was also hungry so she grabbed one of the bowls of cereal. Nathan started eating too and they enjoyed a comfortable silence with Nathan feeling at ease not having to fill the silence. He quickly finished his cereal and was munching on some toast whereas Haley was still only half way through her cereal.

"I was thinking of staying home today and looking after you, you know waiting on you hand and foot and taking care of your every need." Nathan said in an appealing voice. Haley just looked at him sternly but was dying to laugh it didn't surprise her that he was trying to use this as an excuse not to go to school.

"Ok fine I'll go to school." He said slightly pouting Haley couldn't help but giggle at his antics which also made Nathan smile. Haley finished most of her cereal and Nathan took the tray down stairs before heading off to school he quickly came back to check Haley was going to be ok.

"You know where the shower is and there are clean towels but that's the only moving I want you to do." Nathan said seriously "Plus I want you to keep your mobile with you at all times so if you fall you can ring me." He knew it was silly her ringing him as she wasn't talking but even if she rang him and there was no talking he would know to come straight home. "Karen said she would come by at lunch time and Peyton and Brooke are going to come back after school and keep you company and make sure I'm looking after you properly." Nathan finished there trying to remember if there was anything else he should say.

Haley just nodded the idea of having a shower appealed as hopefully it would wake her up a bit. Nathan went over and kissed her on the forehead before rushing out of the room as he was late, he shouted bye as he shut the front door. Haley couldn't help but smile even though she hadn't slept well and was tired just a simple kiss on the forehead from Nathan was enough to make her happy.


	18. Feeling Good

**Chapter 18 - Feeling Good **

**H**aley's week at Nathan's went by slowly although her leg was healing and her appetite was beginning to return thanks to Karen's cooking she was still not sleeping much or talking.

Nathan had noticed the black circles under her eyes that didn't seem to be going but he didn't know what to do he would always ask her if she slept well and she would always nod and smile, he wanted to believe that it was just because she hadn't been sleeping well before the accident but he couldn't help but worry. He was really loving having Haley in his life again although they didn't talk he just loved being around her. They had gotten into a routine after Nathan basketball practise he would pick up dinner from Karen's and go home to Haley.

They would eat dinner then do homework for a few hours and after that they would stay up and watch films. He always stopped what they were watching at 11 so she could get some sleep but she would always pout and look unhappy until he gave her a kiss on the forehead goodnight that was also part of their routine and it was Haley's favourite part of the day.

Every night she also always wished he would ask to stay with her but he never did. Haley usually found the days boring when her friends were at school but Karen had started taking a few hours off in the afternoon to come visit her, she loved the visits and was so grateful that Karen had time to see her.

It was during her visit on the Friday that she had broken some very happy news to Haley. They had been down stairs eating some carrot cake that Karen had brought with her, Karen would normally fill her in with local gossip and how the café was doing. That particular day when Karen came she was quiet while she made them tea and found plates for the cake.

"It's been quite a strange day today Haley and I wanted to tell you something, I haven't told anyone yet not even Lucas although I'll be telling him tonight." Karen said, Haley looked at her curiously she couldn't quite tell if it was going to be a happy or sad secret.

"I'm pregnant." Karen said not know what response she was going to get from the girl in front of her. Haley eyes went wide and as gracefully as she could she hopped off her stool and hugged Karen. Haley was so happy for Karen although she had lost Keith a little part of him was still alive. Haley smiled brightly at Karen and Karen couldn't help but smile too.

"I've had a suspicion for a while but I only got it confirmed this morning." Karen said then looked slightly apprehensive "I'm right to feel happy about this aren't I? it's not disrespectful to Keith to be this happy is it?" She questioned.

Haley just shook her and smiled again she knew that Keith would have been thrilled. There were so many things she wanted to say to Karen like how she knew it would be hard being a single parent but she had done it before and she had lots more help now and how happy Lucas was going to be. She didn't though instead she just hugged her again and hoped that that was enough.

It was Monday morning and it had been agreed by everyone that Haley could go back to school, her leg was still in a cast but she was getting used to her crutches and would be able to get around the school ok.

She had spent the weekend hanging out with Nathan watching films, playing some mini gold with Lucas. Brooke and Peyton had taken her shopping. Brooke had insisted buying some new clothes would make her feel better and she needed some new skirts considering that's all she could really wear at the moment even though winter had officially hit Tree Hill and the weather was chilly.

Haley was nervous about going back to school but she had managed to catch up and was up to date with homework. She was also tired due to her lack of sleep and knew due to her absence from school and her not speaking she would be the centre of gossip once again.

When they arrived at school whispers followed Haley everywhere, she had an appointment with the principle before lessons started as Nathan had filled him in on everything that had happened and about Haley not talking. The Principle had been very nice to her and explained the situation to all her teachers and also told her he had set up a counselling appointment for her, he suggested she might feel better talking to a stranger.

Haley just nodded and smiled at him know that as much as she didn't want to talk to her husband and friends she certainly didn't want to talk to a complete stranger. In her lessons she just tried to keep her head down and take notes, this was ok in her first two classes but in maths her teacher insisted she answer an equation.

She just looked at him blankly and shook her head, she could see him getting fed up, he was a teacher who demanded respect from all his students and he saw Haley's not talking as her disrespecting him. He finally gave up asking her but said he would kick her out of the class if she continued to behave the way she was, Haley fought back the tears as her class mates around her giggled. By lunch time she was exhausted and just wanted to go home and cry but she knew she had to stick it out as this was what she had chosen to do.

Another annoying thing that was happening was complete strangers were coming up to her and asking her random questions. At first she was confused why she was suddenly so popular and to answer their questions she would just shrug and hobble off but by the fifth person she had realised it was just because everyone was trying to work out if it was true and she really wasn't talking. She headed over to the lunch table where all her friends were and sat in the seat next to Nathan and buried her head in his neck although she refused to cry.

"It's ok Haley" Nathan said, he didn't know what had upset her so he just stroked her hair. Haley refused to move she didn't want to have to see the real world again, she wanted so much to just ask Nathan to take her home but she knew if she started talking again she would have to talk about all the other stuff and she just couldn't.

"I heard about what happened in maths today Haley, he's such a dick and don't worry he can't kick you out of the class." Peyton said sympathetically.

"He said he would do what." Nathan practically shouted although his anger made Haley shake slightly so he calmed himself down again for her.

"The gossiping will stop as well" Brooke tried to reassure her, Brooke had had people approach her all day trying to get gossip but she had just shouted at them to leave Haley alone. Haley finally leaned away from Nathan and gave Brooke and Peyton small smiles before she started picking at her lunch.

The others talked around her but she wasn't paying attention she was going to see the counsellor after lunch and she was starting to think it might actually help, to be honest she was starting to get a bit desperate she didn't know how long she could carry on like this. The bell rang signalling the end of lunch and they all started to get up Nathan leaned over and gave Haley a kiss on the cheek and squeezed her hand.

"I'll see you at home ok, don't worry the days nearly over." Nathan said Haley just quickly smiled at him and let go of his hand to grab her crutches. Everyone had training after school so Skill's had offered to give Haley a lift home so she didn't have to wait around in the gym. Haley made her way over to the counsellor's room feeling slightly embarrassed if people didn't think she was crazy before they certainly would now but enough part of her didn't care what anyone thought about her. She entered the room and saw a youngish looking woman sitting behind a desk.

"Hello, I'm Ms Lightbody take a seat please." She motioned to the seat so Haley sat down. "Now anything you tell me here is confidential and I won't tell anyone anything you tell me not even your teachers or parents." She said smiling. Haley just stared at her. Ms Lightbody waited for Haley to say something but she remained silent.

"I understand you have been through a tough couple of weeks but you might find talking about it will help." She tried but Haley still said nothing. They sat in silence for a minute before she tried again.

"When you're a teenager I know every problem seems so massive but when you talk them over with other people it really does lighten your load." She said slightly patronisingly. Haley still stayed quiet but was getting annoyed she didn't like the insinuation that she was making a bigger deal out of her problems then she should be.

"I know your quite a mature student here and seem to do very well in your studies surely you can see you behaviour is a bit childish and maybe even attention seeking?" She said. This made Haley mad but she knew what this woman was trying to do, she had figured out Haley wouldn't talk so she was trying to anger her to get her to say something. Haley just stared at her and kept her lips tightly sealed she really didn't like this woman who assumed that it was some infantile reason why she wasn't talking.

"I must say I am disappointed but we have an hour so I will just wait for you to decide you want to be an adult." She said sternly, Haley felt like she was being told off which she certainly didn't deserve but to be honest she was just happy this woman wasn't going to speak any more. The hour passed quite quickly for Haley who spent her time thinking about her history project and at the end of the practise Ms Lightbody spoke again.

"Well we haven't covered much but I think we've made a nice start, I defiantly think you should come see me again." She said smiling brightly, Haley just gave her a disbelieving look and left the room she couldn't believe this women was responsible for trying to make the students feel better. The rest of the day wasn't too bad but Haley was relieved when classes ended and she finally got to go home. Skill's dropped her home and asked if she wanted him to stay but she shook her head she had homework to do.

The week seemed to pass slowly and every day was a struggle for Haley, she was finding it hard enough getting round the school with her crutches but luckily no more random people were trying to get her to talk as Brooke seemed to have scare them all off although this didn't stop people gossiping about her.

Although whispering would be the wrong word they were talking quite loudly round her calling her a freak they seemed to think just because she couldn't speak she couldn't hear either, although Haley tried to ignore it it hurt that people would make judgements about her without knowing the full story.

Friday was by far the worst day though, it had started snowing Thursday night and by Friday everything was covered in a blanket of snow, although not enough for them to get the day off school. Haley was feeling sluggish on Friday morning so it took her extra long to get ready for school and by the time they pulled into the car park they were just on time.

She managed to get to home room on time but had maths next and was late as it took her extra long to walk through the corridors as the floor was wet and she was being careful. Her maths teacher had taken to ignoring her all week but now that she was late to his class he felt this was another show of defiance against him.

He allowed her to settle down and started the class but he would ask her every time to give an answer to the equations and every time she didn't he would make some small comment about her being stupid while the class sniggered. The class continued on like this for a while but he was showing signs of getting annoyed that she still wasn't talking and he suddenly started smirking.

"Ms James" he always refused to call her by her married name "if you do not answer this equation for me then the whole class is going to have a test on Monday all because of you." He said and smiled at her. Haley sat there stunned and for once the rest of the class weren't laughing, she wasn't sure if he was being serious or not, seeing her look of uncertainty he continued.

"I'm not joking there will be a test on Monday all because of you if you don't give me an answer." He demanded, Haley just looked forward at the equation it was hard and in her tired state she knew she wouldn't be able to work it out. She could feel the other pupils in the class glaring at her and she just shrugged her shoulders.

"Well test on Monday then all thanks to Ms James." He said gleefully before continuing on with the class ignoring Haley again. Haley felt like crap and at the end of class everyone glared at her as they walked past. The day passed without any more drama but she felt miserable and even Brooke's attempts to cheer her up at lunch failed. When the final bell went Haley was so thankful, she couldn't wait to spend the whole weekend away from this place, she couldn't believe she ever enjoyed coming to school.

After going to her locker she was leaving the main building to go over to Skill's car when she was walking past one of her class mates from maths earlier and he stuck his elbow out causing Haley to slip over into the snow. She got soaked and couldn't help but shed a few tears as Skill's came over and helped her up and led her slowly over to the car.

Skill's dropped her off and she had violently shook her head when he suggested he come in with her, she wanted to have a good cry and didn't want him to witness it. When she got in she was happy the central heating had been on all day so the house was nice and warm, she got out of her wet clothes and decided she would just put her pyjamas on which were a pair of shorts that fit over her cast and a cute vest top.

She went back down stairs and settled onto a sofa to do her homework; she was doing well and was half way through her history project when she suddenly heard the front door come crashing open and someone very drunkenly stumble in.

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	19. Just the Way I’m Feeling

**Chapter 19 - Just the Way I'm Feeling **

**E**ver since the shooting he had been a wreck. He had spent day's getting drunk and sobbing. Ever since he had shot his brother Keith dead Dan had been feeling guilty, ever since that day he had been trying to work out what to do to make himself feel better again.

He had acted out of jealousy because he had seen Keith and Karen together looking so happy and he couldn't stand it. It was also revenge he thought it had been Keith that had tried to kill him by setting his office on fire.

When he had gone into the school it had been to find out how Keith was doing but when he saw Jimmy shoot himself he hadn't really been thinking he just picked up the gun and shot Keith.

It had then been easy to say he had walked in and found them both shot. Everything after that had been a blur and it wasn't until he had woken up the next day that an awful feeling of guilt had set in.

He wanted more then anything to make that bad feeling go away and in his drunken state he figured the way to make him self feel better was to be a good father to Nathan. He had stumbled over to his old house to find his son and make himself feel better. He still had his key but in his drunken state he had burst through the door with some force. He had stumbled into the kitchen and finding it empty had stumbled back through into the living room where he found a very shocked looking Haley.

As soon as Haley heard someone come in through the front door she froze because she was so scared. She heard the person stagger into the kitchen and knew this was her chance, she had left her mobile upstairs but there was a phone in the hall she could use to call the police but no sooner had she got to her feet when Dan came into the room.

She didn't know if she was relieved or not that it was Dan and not a burglar, she hadn't seen him since back in the hospital when Keith had died and he didn't look good. He was unshaven and his hair was unwashed and from the way he was walking Haley could tell he was drunk. He was surprised at least in his drunken state to find Haley in his house and it made him angry.

"What the hell are you doing in my house?" He bellowed, Haley was back to being very scared again she didn't dare move but flinched at his angry words, she had no idea what he was going to do. Dan didn't move either he just glared at her.

"You are no good for my son, you've caused him nothing but pain and I won't let you do it any more." He said and made his way over to Haley, she tried to move away from him but she hadn't had time to grab her crutches so he easily grabbed her.

He started dragging her towards the front door while Haley struggled trying to get out of his grasp her legs being dragged across the floor. Dan as he regularly worked out had no trouble pulling Haley to the door and shoving her out into the snow, she landed on her arms.

"Never come back to my house ever." He shouted and slammed the door shut. Haley sat on the floor where she had fallen wondering what the hell she was going to do she had grazed her arms and knew she would be bruised.

She had no phone, money or a coat she only had on her pyjama shorts and vest top. There was no way she was going back into the house though with Dan there she had no idea what he was capable of in his drunken state. She tried to work out the nearest place she could go to get help, she couldn't go to any of the neighbours they were all too snooty and had always turned their nose up at the couple and believed them to young to get married.

She figured the nearest place would be Karen's café and she knew Karen would be working there at this time. She looked around for something to use as a crutch but the only thing she could find was a spade that Nathan had used that morning to clear the snow from the drive, fearing Haley would slip.

It took Haley 40 minutes to walk to the café and it was the longest walk of her life, she was freezing cold as she had next to nothing on and due to being dragged out of the house and shoved her leg was aching and the flannel slippers that she was wearing were soaked through. Also because of the snow no one seemed to be out on the streets so she couldn't get any assistance from anyone she passed. When she finally got to the café it was pretty much empty and Karen just stood there shocked for a second at the sight of Haley stood only in pyjamas slightly bloody shivering inside her café.

"Haley what happened" Karen said rushing to the girl and brought her arms around her and Haley started crying. Karen gently directed her to the back of the café grabbed a blanket and wrapped it round Haley and steered her to a chair. She left Haley and quickly shut up the café looking at her watch she saw Nathan would be in soon to collect dinner so she didn't ring him but returned to Haley who was still crying.

"Haley you need to tell me what happened." Karen said, she was very worried Haley was freezing cold and shivering and had lots of scratches along her arms and legs. Haley didn't answer though she just continued crying and shivering.

"Were you at home?" Haley nodded still crying.

"Did you and Nathan have a fight?" she asked, she knew Nathan would probably have been at practise but she needed to make sure, Haley shook her head.

"Did some one get into the house?" Haley nodded again, Karen noticed the fear in her eyes.

"Was it someone you know?" Haley nodded slowly trying to wipe the tears away with her shaking hands. Karen just sat and looked at her trying to think who it could have been.

"Was it Deb?" she asked gently but Haley shook her head. It then hit Karen who it must have been she looked at Haley

"It was Dan wasn't it?" Haley nodded Karen just hugged the girl and tried to comfort her, she didn't deserve all the bad things that had been happening to her. Karen then heard the door open and the voice of her son.

"Hey mum whys the café closed? What's going on?" Lucas asked sounding worried.

"We're in the back." Karen replied, Lucas and Nathan came into the back of the café and Nathan immediately rushed to Haley's side when he saw her huddled in the blanket.

"What happened" Lucas asked Karen knowing Haley wouldn't be talking. Haley upon Nathan's arrival had put her arms around Nathan's neck and was quietly crying on his shoulder she felt safe now she was in his arms. She had been really scared back in the house with Dan and through out the walk to the café she was worried Dan would suddenly appear again.

"It seems Dan kicked her out of the house but that's all I got out of her." Karen said sadly. Nathan stiffened at Karen's word and unhooked Haley arms from around his neck and stood up. At the lose of contact with Nathan Haley stiffened although it was a different situation she couldn't help but be reminded of being back at the beach house when Nathan had rejected her.

"That son of a bitch, I'm going to kill him." Nathan ranted obviously furious.

"Nathan calm down." Lucas said reaching out to try and restrain him.

"No he's gone to far this time, no body hurts my wife." He said and made for the door but one little voice stopped him.

"Please don't leave me." Haley said.

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**Hey guys, thanks for the lovely reviews. It seems most of you aren't happy with Haley not talking so hopefully you will be happier now. It was actually really hard writing Haley when she wasn't talking. Not too much of the story left now only about 5 left. Enjoy. **


	20. Signal Fire

**Just a quick note that this chapter contains adult content (ie sex) so if you dont want to read that then skip the chapter. Also i have never written a scene like that before so sorry if it's rubbish. Thank you for all the reviews.**

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****Signal Fire **

**N**athan stopped suddenly upon hearing his wife talk for the first time in over a week and quickly returned to her side all his anger forgotten.

"I need you to stay with me." Haley said softly. Nathan stroked her cheek and kissed her forehead making her shiver slightly but not because of the cold.

"It's going to be ok." He said reassuringly, although Haley was scared because she was talking again she also felt relieved.

"I think we need to take you to a hospital you've been out side in the freezing weather and I'm sure you leg needs to be looked at again after all that walking." Karen said grabbing her car keys and starting to lock up. Nathan gathered the still shivering Haley up in his arms with the blanket as well.

"I don't want to get sick again I don't think I could cope with it" Haley said starting to get upset "but I don't want you to have to shut up the café for me you don't all have to come."

"Haley we want to come we need to know your ok, you're our family." Lucas said and squeezed her hand. When they got to the hospital Haley was seen straight away as they were worried she would get pneumonia. She was kept in hospital until Sunday afternoon when they were happy her body temperature had returned to normal although her leg would take longer to heal due to the added pressure put on it.

Nathan stayed by her side the whole time because he wanted to protect her and partly because Haley wouldn't let got of his hand. On the Friday night when Haley had gone to sleep due to the drugs they had given her Nathan and Lucas went back to the house and found a passed out Dan on the sofa.

They had woken him up and chucked him out of the house telling they didn't want to see him again. He had tried to plead with them and said he would apologise to Haley but Nathan told him to stay away from his wife. Haley was drowsy and slept through most of Saturday and woke on Sunday so she hadn't said much all weekend.

Haley was quiet on the journey back to the house not that she had been talking much in the hospital but she knew once she got back soon or later Nathan would want to talk about the stuff that had been going on with her for the past few months and she wasn't sure if she wanted to talk about it.

When she kept the stuff to herself it was almost like it hadn't happened, like it wasn't real or it had happened to someone else. Haley was also nervous about going back to the house, Dan had really scared her and although Nathan had promised that she wouldn't see him she kept expecting him to just appear. They pulled into the drive and as Nathan helped her out the car she couldn't help but grab hold of his hand and hold on tight.

"He has really gone" Nathan said reassuringly although he loved the fact Haley was holding his hand.

"I know." Haley replied.

"Ok so I'm going to take you up stairs then I though I could make some mac and cheese and we could watch a film." Nathan said when they were inside the house.

"Sounds great, although maybe I should help you with the cooking." Haley said sceptically. Nathan looked at her with a mock hurt face and Haley couldn't help but smile.

"I'll have you know Karen's been giving me some cooking tips and I think I will be able to make this easy." Nathan said happy to have made Haley smile.

"Ok hotshot I guess it would be good if you had more then one talent." Haley said cheekily "but don't take too long down here." She said seriously.

"Well how about you stay down here and watch the master chef at work and then we both go up stairs." He said, he didn't want her upstairs worrying by herself. Haley just smiled in agreement and followed him into the kitchen.

An hour later they were upstairs in Nathan's bed watching Talladega nights having finished eating, it had taken Nathan two attempts to make the food as he had burnt the first batch but Haley had complimented him and told him she'd have to let him cook more often. Both were staring at the screen but neither were watching the film, Nathan desperately wanting to talk to Haley but was too scared and Haley unsure if she wanted to talk now. Haley finally spoke up

"I'm really grateful you know for you looking after me." Haley said

"You don't have to be, I've been such an idiot this year, I should have been helping you a lot earlier." Nathan said sincerely. The room was dark with only the tv for light and both Haley and Nathan were looking forwards, they found it easier to talk this way.

"I just don't want you guys to be nice to me because you pity me, no one owes me anything." Haley said.

"I can't speak for anyone else but when I found out about all the bad stuff that had been happening to you all my anger went, I realised I had been pushing you away cause you had left me but you were back and I should have been working to be close to you again." Nathan said, Haley didn't know what to say to that so she just squeezed his hand. They were silent for a while before Nathan spoke again.

"I wish you had told me about you parents Haley, I would have been there for you even if I was still cross." Nathan said firmly.

"I know" Haley said sadly "It's just I didn't want you to pity me and it wouldn't have been fair to you the first time I see you for months and me to tell you that." Haley eyes were filling with tears and she just let them roll down her cheeks. At this Nathan sat up and scooped up Haley so she was sat in his lap leaning against his chest.

"I know how hard it must have been for you I know how close to them you were how much you loved them." Nathan said sincerely. This made Haley cry harder, Nathan didn't say any more while Haley cried, when she had mostly stopped she spoke again.

"It's just like they are still in their R.V somewhere just they don't have signal to contact me." Nathan gently tilted Haley's face up to his and spoke softly but firmly. Lucas had told him that Haley had not talked about her parents or to his knowledge visited their graves since the funeral, he wanted to comfort her but he knew he also had to be firm.

"Haley you can't pretend like that or you'll never be able to move on." Haley started crying again into his chest while he just stroked her hair.

"I can't help but feel guilty." Haley said so quietly Nathan almost couldn't hear her. "If we hadn't of gotten married then they wouldn't have left travelling and they wouldn't have been killed." Haley didn't want to say this to Nathan because she was scared he would take it the wrong way, she had never regretted marrying him. He lifted her chin up again and looked directly in her eyes while he spoke.

"You never know when people are going to die, if they had stayed in Tree Hill maybe they would have died here and then they would never have got to live out their ambition of travelling the country. You should never feel guilty for someone else's death unless it's you that purposely did it. They would never want you to feel guilty." It felt so good for someone to say those words to her, it almost made her wish she'd talked about her parents sooner. Haley smiled up at Nathan and he smiled back he was glad the conversation seemed to be doing Haley some good but he knew there were other difficult issues they needed to talk about. Nathan spoke again tentatively.

"What about the not eating, when you were in hospital the doctors said you were malnourished, was it a cry for help?" Haley looked at him as if he was joking, she was kind of cross at the suggestion she might do that.

"Nathan I haven't been able to afford to eat, my parents left me money but I can only get at it when I turn 18. Karen and Keith helped, they were giving me food at the café when I didn't have any left after paying bills but when Keith died…well it's been a struggle." Haley said carefully she didn't want to talk about Deb with Nathan because last time he had snapped at her. Nathan picked up on her hesitation though.

"Surely you could have still eaten food from Karen's when Keith died it's not like she didn't have money." Nathan said unsure of what the problem was.

"It was my fault really" Haley said trying to make light of things, she didn't know if she was worried to say it because Nathan might be cross at her for saying bad things about his mum or if it was because he would be more cross at his mum. "I never told her I couldn't afford groceries, well I didn't tell anyone and she wasn't herself and well she hasn't been very happy with me since I left." Nathan just looked at her and his face fell.

"I'm so sorry Haley." He said "I guess I knew she was back taking stuff again I was just trying to pretend everything was normal. I'm sorry that she was treating you that way." Haley gave him a small smile and stroked his cheek; she didn't want him to look sad any more.

"It's ok I forgive your mum for everything, she was just trying to protect her son that's what mothers do." Nathan returned the small smile and enjoyed the feeling of her hand on him "And when she's better I want her to come back here and live with us." Nathan leaned down and kissed her on the forehead, he was so grateful he had such a forgiving wife. He was still slightly worried about her eating though, she still wasn't eating like she used to.

"So you're not going to be skipping any meals now." He asked looking concerned. Haley shook her head.

"I can't wait for my full appetite to return but it'll take time." Haley said still smiling, she loved that he cared for her so much.

"So if I told you that I had some Ben and Jerry's down stairs you'd be interested?" Nathan asked.

"Sounds perfect." Haley replied.

"Ok stay right there." Nathan said and Haley lay down as he went down stairs to get the ice cream. It took him a little while as he had to wash two spoons and find the ice cream in the freezer which was full of frozen meals Karen had made for them. When he returned up stairs he found Haley fast asleep, he smiled to himself she looked so peaceful.

He returned down stairs and put the ice cream away. He did the rest of the washing up and then was returning up stairs, he went into Haley's room and kissed her on the forehead and turned off the light. He stripped down so he was only in his boxer shorts and went to brush his teeth, he was returning from the bathroom when he heard a whimpering sound coming from Haley's room. He walked into her room and from the light in the hall he could see her writhing around in bed and looking distressed. He was at her side immediately; he turned on the bed side light and shook her gently.

She awoke looking confused and upon seeing Nathan she threw herself into his arms sobbing. Nathan stroked her back and whispered comforting things to her. Of the many nightmares Haley had been having for the past few weeks this was the first time she had woken up having someone there with her and it was a great comfort to her.

"I'm sorry." Haley said when she had almost stopped crying. "I shouldn't be this upset I should be used to them."

"How long have you been having nightmares for?" Nathan asked gently.

"Since the shooting." She answered quietly still in his arms. Nathan felt guilt well up in him, she'd been having nightmares right here in his house and he hadn't known. Seeing Nathan's guilty face Haley spoke again.

"I wanted to tell you just I haven't been talking" She continued slightly desperately "I just don't know how to make them stop." Nathan was at a lose too he had no idea what to do so he suggested something he had been longing to do since she had come to live with him.

"How about I stay with you tonight, if it will help you sleep." He asked slightly hesitantly.

"I would like that." Haley said giving him a small smile, she lay down on her side and Nathan turned off the lamp then got into the bed behind her so her body was pressed against his front so they were spooning. Nathan lightly put his arm around her waist and noticed how stiff her body was. Although Haley was loving having Nathan next to her in bed she felt so tense after her bad dream and she couldn't go back to sleep because she was scared of having more bad dreams. Her mind just wouldn't switch off and even Nathan's warm body behind her did not relax her.

"Haley you're so tense." Nathan said stroking her arm and moving his hand to stroke her back. "Is that feeling any better?" Haley made a small noise of approval and Nathan started slowly massaging her upper back. The action was defiantly relaxing Haley but it wasn't making her tired, her back tingled from Nathan's touch and as his hand went lower she couldn't help but let out a small moan.

It had been ages since someone had touched her and just having her back rubbed was incredible. Nathan was having increasing trouble breathing steadily as he massaged Haley, being so close to her was intoxicating and he felt all his blood run south. Haley was wearing a strap top and shorts and all her exposed skin was driving him crazy, when he heard her let out a moan all thought's went out his head.

He brought his lips down to Haley's neck and started tenderly kissing her, Haley let out another moan, she was in heaven. She turned round and captured Nathan's lips in a passionate kiss, one hand in his hair the other on his bare chest. It felt so natural to Nathan having Haley like this he brought one hand down to stroke her unplastered thigh and the other moved very slowly up her torso.

He slowly rolled her onto her back conscious of being careful with her injured leg and got on top of her so none of his weight was resting on her. He then started kissing down her neck; he quickly ridded her of her top before he began kissing her breasts. All Haley could do was moan in pleasure as he nipped and tweaked her nipples with his mouth and hands.

He returned to kissing her mouth and she brought a hand down to gently caress his upper thigh occasionally brushing against his hard erection. He was still playing with her breasts but would let out groans of pleasure when she touched his erection. He slowly worked his hand down her body until it was on her thigh which he caressed higher and higher until he plunged two fingers into her wet core.

Haley moaned louder and arched her back at the pleasure, Nathan found the sound a huge turn on and her arching forwards had only brought their bodies closer together. As he continued to gently finger her she brought her small hand down into his boxers and started to rub his hard length. They were both kissing each other passionately and loving the feelings they had been denied for so many months.

Haley then started pulling down his boxers and he knew that was her signalling it as time for them to have sex. He rolled off her and took off his boxer and grabbed and put on a condom while she removed her shorts. He got back on top of her careful to avoid her leg in cast and started kissing her again.

His hand found hers and they entwined together as he thrust into her. They both groaned against each others lips and Haley moved her body up to meet his thrusts. Being together like this was too much for them and it wasn't long before Haley was pushed over the edge of her orgasm and she moaned loudly which was all Nathan needed to follow her over the edge too. When they both had their breathing under control Nathan rolled off her and pulled the blanket back up over both of them.

Nathan put his arm round Haley who was now lying on her back he leaned over and gently kissed her a few times. He felt her body relaxed and it wasn't long before he heard her breathing steady signalling she had gone to sleep, he soon followed her safe in the knowledge that if she had any more bad dreams he would be right there for her.


	21. Distance

**Thanks again for the reviews they are really great. After this one only 3 chapters left I'm afraid. Any way I hope you enjoy what's left.**

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**Chapter 21 - Distance**

**N**athan woke up the next morning with a massive smile on his face last night had been amazing, he opened his eyes and was confused to see the bed empty. He went and checked the bathroom and the kitchen but there was no sign of Haley just a note saying she had gone in early with Brooke, he had a bad feeling in the pit of his stomach. She hadn't mentioned anything about going to school early so he assumed she was regretting last night, he felt like such an idiot he shouldn't have pushed her. He got changed grabbed some breakfast and vowed to apologise to Haley the first chance he got. When he got to school he went to his locker hoping to find Haley but Lucas was there instead.

"Hey man, have you seen Haley this morning?" Nathan asked putting some stuff in his locker.

"Nope I was just going to ask you where she was. You haven't lost her have you?" He said joking, he hadn't noticed how tense Nathan was. Nathan finished putting his stuff in his locker and looked down the corridor.

"No it's just she left for school this morning with Brooke and didn't tell me." Nathan said nervously fiddling with his keys in his pocket. Lucas looked at him suspiciously.

"I'm sure she's safe man, Dan's not going to do anything again." He said trying to reassure his brother.

"Yeah I know, no one would want to mess with Brooke it's just…." Nathan looked down not finishing his sentence. Lucas was really confused now.

"What did you do?" Lucas asked seriously recognising the guilt on Nathan's face. Nathan sighed slightly, he couldn't believe what had been so amazing last night was turning into a nightmare now.

"We slept together. Last night I found her having a bad dream and she was really upset and tense and it sort of happened." Nathan finished, he kind of felt ashamed of himself now like he'd taken advantage of her. Lucas didn't know whether to be cross or not, his instinct to protect Haley was in overdrive at the moment but he also knew Nathan wouldn't deliberately hurt Haley.

"Are you sure she's upset about it?" Lucas asked.

"Well she wasn't there when I woke up this morning which kind of indicates she didn't want to see me." He said sadly "I need to find her and talk to her."

"Until you find her try not to worry too much, you never know maybe she did just have stuff to do this morning." Lucas said trying to reassure his brother he was pretty sure Haley wouldn't have slept with Nathan if she hadn't been ready. There conversation was then interrupted by the arrival of a very happy Peyton and an old friend. Lucas and Nathan looked startled to see him.

"Jake when the hell did you get back?" Lucas asked happily hugging his old friend. Jake smiled at Peyton.

"This weekend, I've been so busy though settling Jenny back in and seeing Peyton." Jake said. Lucas and Nathan then noticed Peyton and Jake's entwined hands.

"Wow I'm so glad you got Jenny back, what happened to Nicki?" Nathan asked. Jake smile got wider.

"Well she finally decided that she didn't actually want a daughter. I let her have Jenny for a couple of days and she realised how much it interfered with her going out and stuff. So here I am with complete custody and I can come back and be with Peyton." Peyton smiled at him, she didn't know when she had been more happy, it had been the best surprise when he had turned up on her doorstep on Sunday morning and he hadn't left her side since then.

"It's great to finally get some good news around here." Lucas said smiling.

"Yeah Peyton filled me in about Haley. How's she doing?" Jake asked, he had been friends with Haley after working in the café with her and was horrified to find out all the stuff that had happened to her. Nathan looked slightly uneasy.

"She's doing better." Was all he said.

"You guys haven't heard about this weekend though have you?" Lucas said, Peyton and Jake shook their heads. Lucas started explaining about Dan and they all started walking towards their homerooms. What none of them noticed was Rachel had been eavesdropping the entire conversation and now had formed a plan to get back at Haley for taking all her friends away, she walked off to class with a evil smirk on her face.

Haley had woken early on Monday morning feeling great, she had enjoyed just watching Nathan who was still fast asleep. She did truly feel wonderful she had slept the rest of the night next to her husband and without any bad dreams.

She wanted to stay in bed until Nathan woke up but she felt in a productive mood, now she had pretty much caught up with her work she wanted to return to tutoring. She knew Brooke had to go to school early for a student president meeting so instead of disturbing Nathan she had texted Brooke and asked for a lift. It was a bit scary for her to get up knowing Nathan was asleep, since Dan had come crashing into the house on Friday she hadn't not been with Nathan.

She knew she had no lessons with him so she wouldn't be able to see him until lunch anyway but the thought he wouldn't be there to protect her left her feel a bit uneasy. She had managed to get dressed with out disturbing him and only hurriedly remember to leave him a note. She had got to school and been assigned new students who she was to tutor in her free period before lunch and after school. She was just packing up after her first session and was looking forward to going to find Nathan for lunch when Rachel walked into the tutoring centre looking worried.

"What do you want?" Haley asked her icily, she really disliked the girl who had done nothing nice for her since she had arrived. Rachel walked over to her and sat down at the chair opposite her.

"Actually I was looking for you." She said still looking anguished, it seemed obvious to Haley she was looking for her as no one else was in the room.

"And you want?" Haley asked in an annoyed tone she felt no need to be nice to Rachel.

"Well I know I've never been very nice to you but I thought there was something you should know, I've been feeling guilty about it for so long I just needed to confess." Rachel said, Haley looked at her suspiciously as far as she knew Rachel never felt bad about doing anything.

"What is it?" Haley asked bluntly she didn't want to have a long drawn out conversation with the other girl she wanted to go find and kiss Nathan.

"Well I just want you to understand I was upset and so was he and we both regretted it afterwards." Rachel said fiddling with her hands.

"Just tell me." Haley said, she was starting to get a heavy feeling in her stomach she didn't like where this conversation was going.

"Nathan and I slept together." Rachel said. Haley was shocked, she hadn't expected Rachel to say that.

"I don't believe you." Haley said uncertainly. She tried to be rational Rachel was a liar and she had no reason to believe anything she said.

"Well it was just after the shooting we were both upset and he was comforting me and one thing lead to another, I don't think he was thinking straight." Haley felt sick, she really didn't want to believe what Rachel had said but hadn't the same thing happened last night, Nathan had been comforting her and it had lead to sex.

"My husband would not sleep with you." Haley said although she still felt a little doubt ebbing away at her. Rachel stood still looking troubled.

"Well I tried to tell you, I was trying to be nice for a change." She said but as soon as she turned her back on Haley and was walking out the door she had a massive grin on her face although Haley had said she hadn't believed her she had seen how unsure she looked.

As soon as Rachel was walking out the room a few tears slid down Haley's cheeks, she was pretty sure that Rachel was lying but just the thought of Nathan sleeping with someone else upset her. She needed to go find Nathan so he could deny it and they could laugh about what a bitch Rachel was but first she had to let her tears dry.

Nathan had been looking out for Haley all morning but hadn't seen her anywhere it was only at the beginning of lunch when he bumped into Brooke and she suggested he try the tutoring centre that he finally found her. He bumped into a grinning Rachel as he entered the tutor centre but he was too busy thinking about Haley to pay any attention to her. He walked in and saw Haley wiping at tears looking upset. He couldn't bear her looking sad so with out letting her speak he sat down next to her and started apologising.

"Haley I'm so sorry it was a mistake ok, I wasn't thinking properly. I've been trying to find you all day to talk to you." Nathan said he hated seeing his wife upset and he wanted her to know he felt bad about rushing her into things last night. Haley seemed to cry more at his apology; she assumed he had seen Rachel leaving and upon seeing her state guess she had told her and that's why he was apologising.

"I don't see how you can just say it was a mistake and expect me to be able to just move on. How can I trust you, know you won't do it again." Haley said feeling sick to her stomach, she hadn't really believed Rachel but now it seemed her husband was confirming he had slept with Rachel. Why hadn't he told her earlier, her mind was clouded by pain.

"I'm sorry" he said again he had found it so hard being around her but not being with her and felt that until last night he had been amazingly restrained "it's just hard to control myself sometimes" Nathan was cut off by Haley rising to her feet a look of pure anger on her face. She couldn't believe he was justifying sleeping with Rachel because he couldn't control himself. She needed to get away from him, she needed fresh air and she needed for it to be last night again when she had been so happy.

"I can't look at you right now." Haley said her eyes full of tears, she grabbed her crutches and left Nathan alone and miserable in the tutor centre. He had thought she was going to be upset but she seemed really angry too, he felt awful for rushing her into sex after she had been through so much and he just hoped she would have forgiven him for not having enough restraint with her.


	22. Warning Sign

**Chapter 22 - Warning Sign **

**A**s Haley left the tutor centre she was in shock, if Nathan had slept with Rachel then that meant they were over. This was too much for Haley after she had just got him back so she decided to just ignore it. Its how she had been dealing with most of the bad things in her life and if she could just act normal then everything would be ok she told herself.

This attitude got her through the rest of her classes and then she tutored after school after that she had rung Lucas and found out he was helping Peyton paint her room so that's where she headed.

It took her a while to get to Peyton's as she was walking with her crutches and she tried to concentrate on just the small pain in her injured leg every time she made contact with the ground.

She got to Peyton's and just let herself in as everyone did, she already felt closer to Peyton and Brooke again even though she hadn't actually spoken to either of them yet but just hanging out with them had been fun. It was nice although Peyton could be a major bitch when she was your friend she was lovely. Haley got a major surprise when she walked in the room and found Jake in the room with Peyton and Lucas, she hadn't seen any of her friends all day so had no idea he had returned.

"Jake" Haley said surprising the three friends who hadn't heard her coming up the stairs.

"Hey" Jake said going up and giving her a big hug.

"So your back?" Haley asked excitedly completely forgetting the other things on her mind because of the good news.

"Yeah I've got custody of Jenny and I'm back for good." Jake said smiling again at Peyton who returned the smile.

"That's so amazing." Haley said and walked over to the bed where Jenny was lying and tickled her chin. "She's so beautiful Jake, you must be so proud."

"Yep I'm a very proud father." Haley smiled down at Jenny "We're repainting the room if you want to help; I want to make it more child friendly." Peyton said they had started painting the walls a pale blue and there were a few while clouds on the walls.

"I'd love to." Haley said and grabbed a paint roller and some blue paint. They had been painting for half an hour and laughing and messing round when they noticed Haley wasn't joining in. She had been painting but she had not said anything since she had started. Peyton gave Lucas a meaningful look and he went and sat down next to Haley who was on the floor painting to rest her leg.

"Hey, is something up." Lucas asked delicately. Haley looked up at him and smiled, it was the fakest smile he had even seen.

"No I'm fine, just a bit tired." She said in a very fake voice.

"Hales is it Nathan." Lucas asked gently. Haley's face fell and her eyes began to water. "Please tell me, you don't have to keep stuff bottled up." Haley said something quietly but Lucas didn't hear it. "What?" He asked.

"Nathan slept with Rachel." Haley said a bit louder as the tears rolled down her cheeks. Lucas looked confused for a second.

"Haley are you sure? Nathan actually told you that." Lucas asked he was pretty sure Nathan wouldn't do that to Haley.

"Well I wasn't when Rachel told me but Nathan confirmed it, he said it was hard to control himself sometimes" She finished her sentence off bitterly she couldn't believe he had tried to use that to justify himself like that. Lucas feeling of confusion quickly turned to anger, he couldn't believe Nathan could do that to her he rose to his feet and turned to the door just as Brooke and Nathan entered. Peyton had texted them a bit earlier to ask them to come help them paint, they froze in the door way as they saw an upset Haley and a very angry Lucas.

"Come with me now." Lucas said menacingly to Nathan.

"Broody." Brooke said concern evident in her voice at what had caused Lucas obvious bad mood.

"Not now Brooke." Lucas replied he walked out the door down onto the porch and a very confused Nathan followed him. Nathan had no idea why Lucas was so pissed off at him now; he had talked to him this morning and had seemed to be sympathetic towards him.

"Luke what the hell?" Nathan said when he got outside with Lucas he was pretty sure he didn't deserve the death stares Lucas was sending him.

"Don't what the hell me, how could you sleep with Rachel." Lucas said angrily pacing up and down the porch.

"What the hell are you talking about; I would never sleep with Rachel." Nathan said now feeling very confused. Lucas turned back to him

"You told Haley you did." Lucas said relief starting to replace his anger.

"No I apologised earlier for rushing things last night." Nathan said still feeling confused, how the hell had Haley thought that meant he had slept with Rachel. Lucas was not angry any more, it took him a few seconds but he figured out what had happened.

"I guess Rachel must have told Haley that she slept with you then when you apologised Haley thought it was for something else." Lucas said, he was so glad it was all a misunderstanding.

"That bitch, I can't believe she's still going out of her way to cause trouble. I need to go talk to Haley. Nathan said and headed back inside, he got up to Peyton's room and found Haley sat drying her tears with Peyton and Brooke on either side of her, it made Nathan happy to see that the girls were all back to being friends.

"Hales we need to talk." Nathan said and the others excused themselves from the room taking Jenny with them.

"I have never slept with Rachel." Nathan said and watched as a look of relief spread over Haley's face but instead of also feeling happy Nathan felt pissed off. He couldn't believe after all the stuff he'd done for her she would ever believe he could do something like that.

"I can't believe you think I would sleep with someone else." Nathan said angrily, the smile immediately fell from Haley's face at Nathan's angry tone.

"Do you think my wedding vows mean nothing to me, you're the one who left me I did nothing wrong there is no reason that you should doubt my love." He said the stress of the days worrying about Haley finally catching up with him, all the issues he still had but kept bottled up were spilling out.

"Nathan I" Haley started but Nathan interrupted her.

"I'm your husband Haley you're meant to believe me and not some whore." He shouted the last word whore and quickly left the room, Haley winced as she heard the front door slam as he left the house. She suddenly felt dirty because of the things he'd inadvertently accused her of doing, of forgetting her wedding vows of leaving him.

Haley felt so frustrated like she was back at the end of the summer again when Nathan wasn't talking to her. She couldn't believe things had turned around so much in just a couple of hours. The others all came back into the room and came to sit round Haley who had sat down on the bed. Brooke was the first to speak.

"What happened?"

"Nathan left." Was all Haley said she felt a familiar sense of misery settle over her.

"You can talk to us Haley, we can help you make stuff better." Lucas said.

"Yeah you need to let us in this time." Peyton agreed. Haley's frustration came back and instead of taking her anger on Nathan who hadn't let her tell her side of things she took it out on her friends. She stood and turned round to face them.

"Let you guys help me." Haley said and sighed sarcastically. "Like you guys all helped me last time you mean." They all looked at Haley shocked they were not used to her being mean. "Do you really think I want any of your help." She turned to look at Peyton

"You were a complete bitch to me when I got back and maybe I deserved it but then when Jake comes back he's welcomed with opened arms and he doesn't have half the problems I had, but I guess he's obviously a lot more special then I am." Peyton was stunned and didn't know what to say.

Haley then turned to Brooke "And you are a selfish cow, Lucas was pretty much the only friend I had when I came back and still you begrudged the time he spent with me even though I didn't tell him about my parent's deaths all summer just so he could stay having a good time with you."

"Well I didn't ask you too." Was all Brooke managed to mumble out. Haley then turned to Lucas and for a second he thought she wouldn't have anything to say but she continued with her rant.

"You're meant to be my best friend Lucas but you continually chose Brooke over me pretty much every time and made me feel like a burden to you. I heard you arguing with Brooke when I was ill about not wanting to look after me and it made me feel a million times worse, also Nathan wasn't coming to look after me the next day but I didn't want to get in the way of your make out sessions with Brooke." Lucas felt so bad, he knew Haley must be really upset to be lashing out like this.

"And when Keith died you didn't even see how I was doing, you knew he was like a second father to me, you knew how much he meant to me and you just left me slaving away at the café.

This year you guys have made me feel like I don't deserve to be cared for, like I did something so bad and that I'm an awful person. After I got shot again you guys final talked to me again and I forgave you all for the harsh way you treated me because I felt I deserved it but I really didn't. So you know what guys I don't need any of you, I made a mistake and so you all didn't have time for me so now that you've all made mistakes I don't think I have the time for any of you."

She finished looking so sad that none of them dared say anything horrible back. Haley grabbed her crutches and for the second time that day stormed out of a room. It was only when she got outside that she realised she had no where to go.

Her anger had subsided slightly and she felt ashamed of herself for having a go at her friends who had been so great lately. Although it was winter and she didn't have a coat she decided to go down to the docks to the table where she had once tutored Nathan.

She arrived and was glad to find the area empty. She sat down at the table and shivered slightly trying to work out what to do next, where to go who to see what to say. No answers came as she stared out to sea and the hours passed she was so deep in thought she didn't notice the tall dark haired guy approaching her table.


	23. Halo

**Chapter 23 - Halo**

**A**fter shouting at Haley Nathan went to the river court and played some basketball for a while to clear his mind. He knew he shouldn't be getting cross at Haley he didn't want to lose her but at the same time he couldn't help some of the unresolved issues he had. After two hours he worked out most of his anger and knew it was time to go speak to his wife again. When he got to Peyton's he was told about Haley's out burst and once again he was very worried about her.

He knew Haley though and knew where she would go so he left Peyton's promising to let them know later how Haley was. He arrived at the docks and just watched her for a few minutes. She looked so beautiful staring thoughtfully out to sea. Eventually he made a move towards her and sat down on the bench next to her.

It felt like the beginning of the year again when they had talked the first lunch back but he was determined to have it turn out differently. He didn't speak though, he was unsure of what to say as he had got cross for a reason. Haley was still staring out to sea but began speaking.

"I think you guys think too much of me, you have very high expectations of me." Haley said not looking at him. Nathan had been expecting many things but not for her to say that, he was unsure of what to say so he let her carry on talking. She turned to look at him.

"So when I make a mistake like going away on tour everyone's really disappointed in me, more then they should be, more then in someone else who makes mistakes all the time. I mean you recon it's due to me that you changed and that's a big thing to credit one person with" Haley said.

"Would that someone who makes a lot of mistakes be me." Nathan said neutrally.

"Everyone makes mistake's not just you, but that's my point because we all do it and we all need forgiveness." Haley said softly.

"I want to forgive you, I really do I guess I'm just scared that your going to go again." Nathan said sadly.

"Nathan I'm not going anywhere! I'm applying to Duke and I'm never going to sing again. No one can make me leave you again, apart from you." Haley said earnestly.

"Really?" Nathan said his face so full of hope that it made Haley smile.

"I'm a smart girl Nathan I don't make the same mistakes twice." Nathan just stared at her happily for a moment then his face creased in confusion.

"You're never going to sing again?" Nathan asked confused, he didn't like the thought that she might leave him again on a tour but at the same time he didn't want to be responsible for her missing out on a dream of hers. Haley looked away from him, it had never really come up the fact that she didn't play or sing any more and she didn't really want to talk about it but she knew she had to be honest with her husband.

"I just can't any more I associate singing and playing with loosing people and I don't think I could get any happiness from it any more." She said sadly. Nathan gently lifted her chin up so she was looking in his eyes again.

"I'm really sorry Hales maybe you just need to give it some time." Nathan said. Haley quickly kissed his lips, she was so grateful that he hadn't just been happy for her to give music up and maybe she could return to music at some point but not for a while.

"I need to explain about earlier too." Haley said but Nathan cut her off.

"No I'm sorry I guess everyone over reacts sometimes." Haley then cut him off.

"No look I didn't believe her ok, I was upset when you came in the room just because the thought of it was horrible and it was only when you seemed to confirm it that I believe it." Haley said, she wanted to set him straight she really didn't think he would ever cheat on her. Nathan looked at her and gave her a small smile.

"Good, I don't want you to think I'm capable of that. I was actually apologising because this morning you weren't in bed when I woke up so I thought you regretted last night and I had pushed you too far." Nathan said sadly. Haley gave him another quick kiss but he was ready for it this time and he deepened the kiss only letting her break away when he needed to breath.

"Last night was amazing." Haley said slightly breathily she shivered slightly.

"Here take my jacket, you must be freezing." Nathan said slipping out of his coat.

"No then you'll be cold." Haley replied.

"You can keep me warm" he said then smirked. He draped the coat round Haley then pulled her into his lap so she was facing him, he kissed her again and he felt her shiver again but he knew it wasn't due to the cold.

"You know last night after you joined me in bed was the first time in ages I haven't had a nightmare." Nathan looked at her seriously.

"Maybe talking about the shooting will help stop the nightmares. You don't know how bad I feel I bumped into you at the hospital and let you comfort me when you had just been through hell." Nathan said with regret in his voice. "I wish you had told me though." He finished softly. Haley's eyes filled with tears as she thought back to that horrible day.

"I was going to tell you, that's what I was coming to do, I left my hospital bed to find you but when I heard what had happened with Keith I couldn't add to everyone's unhappiness." She had felt stupid at the time not telling them but also she had found it an impossible thing to bring up when everyone had presumed she was at home all day.

"You know that night I was cross that you hadn't come to see me in the evening. I was so sure you would come comfort me and I thought you were being so selfish and then you didn't come and visit me at all. I should have realised something was wrong." He said sadly, it still drove him crazy that he hadn't been there for her.

"That first night my arm was hurting so bad I couldn't think of anything else but if it hadn't I would have come round and then the days after that I was working and you always seemed to be with other people. You know I didn't even see Lucas. I think that was one of my worst weeks, I was so tired." Nathan stroked her hair and she leaned her head on his shoulder so when she spoke her breaths tickled his throat.

"What happened in the tutor centre?" Nathan asked gently wrapping his arms securely round her waist. She shuddered slightly apart from her constant nightmares she had not gone over what had happened that day and her eyes filled with tears again.

"We didn't know that Jimmy was the gunman to begin with." Haley said her voice thick with emotion. "It wasn't until we were going to leave the tutor centre to get out of the school that he pulled out the gun.

Everyone was just so shocked and he made us all sit at the back of the room. We all tried to talk to him but he was so angry and sad. It kind of seemed hopeless then and I began thinking maybe it would be ok to die as at that time everything had been so crap I didn't know if I had anything to live for anyway." Tears slid down Nathan's cheeks just the thought that Haley may have been feeling so down that she didn't know if she wanted to keep living upset him so much.

"But I realised I did have stuff to live for and I wanted to make stuff right for us. I don't know what changed but we managed to convince Jimmy to let us go, I think he was just sick of all of it, he hadn't wanted it to go that far. So he let us leave in pairs, there was six of us and Skills and Abbey went first cause she's diabetic and then Rachel obviously insisted that she got to go next and she took Mouth." At the mention of Rachel Haley's voice had got harder.

"It was then so stupid, we were leaving but Marcus had not kept his mouth shut the whole time he was in there and I think he couldn't stop himself from talking sometimes." Haley said sounding like she was trying to make sense of what had happened. She paused, the next bit was the worst bit and although she had been reliving it in various forms in her dreams it was hard to talk about.

"It's ok you can tell me take your time." Nathan said softly, his body was freezing cold despite Haley being on his lap and it wasn't due to the weather. The though of all this stuff happening to his wife while he was in the stupid gym was horrific.

"We were leaving the room and Marcus made a stupid comment and Jimmy got so cross and came towards us and said he deserved it and pulled the trigger." Haley's voice was getting quieter and quieter.

"I didn't want Jimmy to be a killer so I pushed Marcus and then I got hit, it was so painful and I fell to the floor." Haley started crying as she told the last bit.

"I heard another shot then Marcus was on the ground next to me and I called out but he wouldn't move and then I must have passed out." Haley finished still in floods of tears. Nathan stroked her back and held her really tight. It was weird she realised she had been the last person to see Marcus alive. When she had stopped crying she spoke again.

"I think I need to talk to Marcus' parents, it might make them feel better knowing his final moments."

"You might need to sugar coat it a little, it sounds like he brought it on himself." Nathan said.

"He didn't deserve to die." Haley said shocked "He just had trouble keeping his mouth shut we were all scared."

"I know I didn't mean it like that, your right I think they would really like that." Nathan said seriously "I think also we should go visit your parent's graves, well if you don't want me to come you can take someone else like Lucas."

"I would love you to come, it's going to be hard though." Haley said still wrapped in Nathan's arms.

"I know baby but I'll be here for you all the way and I promise in the long run it will make you feel better." Nathan said and kissed the top of her head. They stayed like that for a while just in each others arms when Haley spoke again.

"I messed up, I shouted at everyone again." Haley said sadly.

"Did they deserve it?" Nathan asked, when he had seen them before while trying to find Haley they hadn't seemed cross just worried.

"A bit, yeah. I guess I had some unresolved issues with everyone too." Haley said.

"Well if they deserved it they won't be cross. Plus at the moment they still feel guilty so you could probably get away with most stuff." Nathan said trying to lighten the mood. Haley thought for a moment.

"I don't want to be treated differently." Haley said she just wanted stuff to be back to normal.

"Give it some time although I'm afraid I'm always going to treat you differently." Nathan said and Haley looked up at his face. Her cheeks were wet from her tears, her eyes were red and her hair was messy but to Nathan she was the most beautiful girl in the world.

"Because you love me." Haley said.

"Yeah and I always will." He said and kissed her gently on the lips.

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This is my last chapter well still the epilogue to come. Hope you all liked it, i personally think it was a little bit rushed and maybe not everything is resolved but hopefully i can tie everything up in the epilogue also i had no idea how to end this story which may explain why it isn't so good. So epilogue tomorrow and i just want to thank everyone who's reviewed and especially everyone who had repeatedly left reviews they mean a lot to me.


	24. Epilogue Part 1

**Hey loyal readers, basically I've had quite a busy weekend so I'm going to post part 1 of the epilogue and post part 2 tomorrow. Just means both bits will maybe not be too long but because I'm not as rushed they will hopefully be better. Thanks**

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**Epilogue Part 1**

"**I**'m going to miss you so much, I hate the fact you're going to university so far away. I don't think I'm going to cope not seeing you everyday, we won't be the same any more." Haley said sadly. She was sitting in Karen's café and had just finished her final shift as it was the end of the summer and she was off to university in two days. Her eyes filled with tears but it felt nice being able to be open with her feelings, she knew now it was the best way to deal with things.

"Haley we will never change our friendship will last forever." Lucas said holding his best friends hand. "Plus you have Nathan going to the same university as you and Peyton and Jake are only an hour ago, you will always have someone." He was still a bit worried about her, she was doing a lot better and was finally looking healthy and happy but he still worried after all that had happened in the last year.

"But they aren't you, I've known you since I was little. I guess at Thanks giving we will just have to hang out lots and no seeing Brooke and Nathan." Haley said smiling a little.

"Well if you can go with out seeing Nathan I can go with out seeing Brooke but I'm thinking it would last about 5 minutes." Lucas said also smiling.

"Okay so maybe we wouldn't be able to last long but still lots of us hanging out too."

"So how about one last game of mini golf before I have to dismantle it?" Lucas said standing Haley also stood but looked horrified.

"You can't take it down we will need it for when we return and you'll need it to teach Lily how to play." Haley said following Lucas upstairs.

"Lily's not even born yet and ok just for you I will persuade my mum to let me kept it up." Lucas said.

"Yay thank you." Haley said smiling widely, if that's what it took to keep Haley happy Lucas would do it and a lot more.

"So on our final night in town together we're not going to a party." Brooke questioned. The others all laughed.

"There are going to be lots of parties when we get to university I thought it would be nice for out last night just to be us." Lucas said kissing Brooke on the forehead. Brooke, Lucas, Haley, Nathan, Skills, Mouth, Bevin, Peyton and Jake were all hanging out at Karen's café which Karen had closed early for them so they could hang out together.

"I'm the only one here single, it's a complete couples fest." Mouth complained.

"We'll all be good I promise." Haley said although she knew Mouth was joking and just happy to hang out with his friends as they all were. "I'll go get our food." Haley said starting to get up she was still loving the fact she could get around with out the help of crutches.

"No you don't we will." Nathan said as he and Lucas stood up.

"Girls you should all get shot then you'll get waited on hand and foot too." Haley said joking. No one laughed though. "What too soon." Everyone nodded their heads seriously.

"You never were that funny any way Hale's." Lucas said trying to lighten the mood, it had been a couple of months but no one really liked being reminded of the beginning of the year and how they had all behaved.

"Fine don't laugh at my jokes then pick on me that'll make me feel better." Haley said and mock pouted. Nathan kissed her on the forehead.

"We love you really Haley and we can fake laugh if it will make you happy." Peyton said and Haley swatted at her arm.

Haley was happy though, things had been pretty normal for the last few months of school, they had all graduated and Haley had been valedictorian. She had been a bit weepy because her parents hadn't been there but was massively surprised when all her siblings turned up instead.

The summer had been spent for Haley working at Karen's, babysitting and spending time with her friends. They had all treated her with kid gloves for a bit but every thing was pretty much back to normal now, although no one liked her joking about the bad stuff that had happened. Nathan and Lucas came back with the food and they all enjoyed eating and talking about the good times they had had over the years. The evening went quickly and they also talked about their favourite events of the past few months.

"Winning state championships was amazing it's been my dream since I was a child." Nathan said fondly.

"Yeah just seeing coaches face, I'm glad he could retire proud and happy." Lucas said.

"It's a good job Skills joined the team or you'd never have won." Bevin said kissing Skills proudly, he had joined the team for only the last few months but had been impressive enough to get a scholarship.

"Personally I think if the commentating hadn't been so good you would never have made it." Mouth said and the others laughed.

"Graduation was defiantly the best." Haley said, she had been so proud of herself for being valedictorian after all she'd been through.

"Your speech was great Hales, I always knew you'd be valedictorian since we were little." Lucas said and Haley smiled at him.

"I didn't really like graduation it was embarrassing." Bevin said blushing slightly.

"It wasn't your fault you tripped baby, the gown was too long, plus you were so excited it was very cute." Skills said kissing her and Bevin just smiled at him.

"Prom was my favourite." Brooke said with a wicked twinkle in her eyes. "You never did tell us Haley how you managed to wet Rachel's dress just before she was announced Prom queen so it looked like she had wet herself." Haley smiled, she knew it was childish but the revenge had been amusing.

"It was so funny when Matt the prom king wouldn't dance with her cause he thought she had." Peyton said smirking.

"Well I got Nathan to distract her, not like that." Haley said when she saw the look on Brooke's face. "I just splashed a bit of punch on her and she didn't notice." Haley said smiling.

"It was just so funny how no one believed her when she denied it; Rachel is defiantly someone who deserves some public humiliation." Peyton said.

"I can't believe she won in the first place, I mean who voted for her." Bevin said.

"No one else well known went up for it." Brooke said matter of factly.

"It was nice that that picture of all of us from prom was in the year book." Mouth said.

"I hate year book, do you know how many fresher girls asked me to sign theirs." Nathan said rolling his eyes.

"Probably the same number of freshman guys who asked me." Brooke said cheekily she had loved the attention.

"Aww poor you Nate being hot and popular." Haley said sarcastically.

"It's a good job we are or you two wouldn't be interested in us." Brooke said to Lucas and Haley joking along.

"It's true we are very shallow." Lucas agreed while laughing.

"They were the first things that attracted me to Nathan along with his cruelness and massive" Brooke raised her eye brows and Haley swatted her and then continued "ego."

"I'm better now though." Nathan said slightly paranoid.

"Of course." Haley said and kissed him.

"We've all changed quite a bit in high school, become better people." Peyton said thoughtfully. Lucas raised his glass of coke.

"A toast to us, because high school didn't fuck us up." And they all raised their glasses too.


	25. Epilogue Part 2

**Sorry the site wouldn't let me up load it yesterday, hope you enjoy.**

**Epilogue Part 2**

**I**t was just past midnight when Brooke started to get emotional.

"I don't know if I can be so far away from you guys, I've got no one." Brooke said pouting.

"You have me." Lucas said looking very offended. Brooke kissed him.

"I know but I'm not going to have my girlie friends, you're all on the east coast and we're on the west." Brooke pouted again.

"Brooke like its possible you're not going to make millions of new friends. We'll all go our separate ways and make loads of friends then visit each other all the time and have lots of fun all over the country." Peyton said matter of factly.

"Plus we're all going to be so busy with University stuff; it'll seem like no time before its thanks giving." Haley added, although she didn't want to leave behind her friends she was very excited about going to university, she'd been dreaming of doing so for years. Jake looked down at his watch.

"I'm sorry guys but we should go, big drive tomorrow and I want to make sure Jenny sleeps well." Jake said getting up.

"Yeah we have early flights tomorrow so we should go too." Lucas said. They all got up slowly and slightly awkwardly, knowing it was the last time they were going to see each other for a while.

Haley hugged Skills and Bevin first they were also going to Duke so she knew she would be seeing the two of them in a few days, safe journey was all she said. It was funny if anyone had told her a few years ago that she would be happy about going to the same university as Bevin she would say they were crazy but she really liked Bevin, she was a really sweet girl.

Next she hugged Mouth, it had always made her feel more secure when Mouth was around, he was a bit geeky just like her and she sometimes really noticed the difference between them when she was hanging out with her friends.

Next she hugged Jake, "Keep up the singing." He whispered in her ear, she looked at his shocked. It was true she had been singing again but only when babysitting and Jake had heard her singing to Jenny. "You'll be able to sing again with others soon."

"Thanks." Haley said smiling at him gratefully. It had been so nice having Jake back and since he had full custody of Jenny he was a lot less stressed.

Then she hugged Peyton, she was so glad Peyton wouldn't be too far away, although she loved Brooke to pieces she felt she had more in common with Peyton and also it had been really helpful talking to Peyton about losing parents.

"So I'm coming to visit in 3 weeks." Peyton said to her.

"Yep and I promise I will find all the best music shops to show you." Haley said smiling.

"You better, from what I've seen where we are they just have a big super store thing." Peyton said and rolled her eyes and Haley chuckled. Haley knew that if the start of university was bad at least she could look forward to seeing Peyton.

Brooke walked over to her then with tears in her eyes.

"Were not going to loose contact are we?" Brooke asked.

"There's no way, you're so loud when you want to be I'm sure I'll be able to hear you all the way across the country." Brooke laughed slightly. "Plus you have to promise to look after Lucas for me." Haley said seriously.

"I promise I will, plus I guess maybe in the future we'll be sister in laws." Brooke said more cheerfully. Haley laughed again don't let Lucas hear you say that it'll defiantly scare him off. Brooke just stuck her tongue out at her and went to talk to Peyton.

Haley hugged Lucas last and she didn't want to let go. The others had finished saying good and just waited.

"Do you think we should be jealous?" Brooke asked Nathan.

"Well it does seem Lucas does only go for girls I've slept with." Nathan said cockily. Lucas broke apart from Haley.

"That is not my criteria and I would never sleep with Haley." Lucas said.

"Yeah yuck, were not 14 any more you can have a best friend of the opposite sex without fancying them." Haley said and gave Lucas one more quick hug. They all left the café into the dark going their separate ways all happy that come what may they had some good friends to fall back on.

Haley lay in bed that night but couldn't sleep. It wasn't because she was worried about nightmares because she hardly had them any more only when she got stressed but because she was excited and a little scared. She kept tossing and turning and this was what was keeping Nathan up.

"What's wrong?" Nathan asked sleepily.

"I can't sleep." Haley said pouting a bit.

"I could work that one out, any reason why?" Nathan asked now more awake.

"I guess I'm nervous about university, the fact Lucas is going to be so far away." Haley said.

"Maybe I should be jealous about you and Lucas." Nathan said chuckling.

"I'm just a bit worried, if something goes wrong with us then he's always the person I fall back on. He's always been there and now he won't be." Haley said sadly, it was always a worry at the back of her mind that something would happen with her and Nathan again.

"We are going to be fine." Nathan said and kissed her. "Plus its only going to be four years who knows where we are going to be after that, we may well be back near Lucas." Nathan said to reassure her.

"So you're not going to fall for some slutty cheerleader?" Haley said.

"Ha no way, slutty cheerleaders are over rated. I would rather have my smart beautiful wife. I don't need to go any where else as you give me everything I need." He said and kissed her again, Haley deepened the kiss.

"And you're not going to fall for some super brainy guy." Nathan asked, it was always a secret fear that Haley would leave him for someone better, he always felt that Haley could do better then him.

"I nearly lost you once, never again. Plus going out with you makes me seem smarter." Haley said laughing.

"Oh yeah." Nathan said and started tickling her. Haley begged him to stop as she laughed away uncontrollably.

"You're a mean bully, picking on me when I'm so little." Haley said pouting again but truthfully she had loved having Nathan all over her.

"I'm sorry baby I'll make it up to you." He said and kissed her gently. Although leaving Nathan had meant she had nearly lost him she was glad she had gone, she now appreciated every second she had with Nathan and every kiss made her tingle.

"Just think in four years time you could be playing in the NBA." Haley said.

"If I don't injure myself." Nathan said

"Or realise how rubbish basketball is." Haley said, Nathan just stuck his tongue out at her.

"A lot can happen in four years Hales but I can guarantee at least for the summer we'll be back right here in four years and hopefully our friends will be too." Nathan said and kissed her on the forehead. "I was also thinking maybe when we're done with university we could renew our vows but do it in front of everyone this time." Haley just smiled at him.

"I would love to, I'm so glad though that my parents were there the first time."

"Yeah they were so happy for us." Nathan added slightly saddened knowing his parents hadn't been the same.

"I hope that one day I'm as good parents as they were." Haley said.

"I have no doubt you will be. Just not for a few years I hope." He added and they both smiled "Now we need some sleep." He said and kissed her again. Haley snuggled up to her husband knowing how luck she was and drifted off into a peaceful sleep.

The End

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**So that's the end the stories over and I would really like to thank everyone who's reviewed the feed back did make me feel so great and spurred me on to make my story better. If possible an over all review of the story would be good what people thought was good and bad just so I can do better with my next story. Although at the moment I have no idea what it will be, I have a few ideas but normally I need to work them through in my mind so it may well be a while before I write something else. I really appreciate everyone who added this story to their favourites as well. Also I'm afraid i have no plans to write a sequel to this story. **

**Also just quickly has anyone else seen any of the plots for season 5? I'm really disappointed for Haley it looks like she's just going to have to be dealing with a moody Nathan so I hope they give her her own good story lines. **


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